Vlad Jr. - the famed Yankee-in-Training - bounced one to SS Anthony Volpe, who waited on a high hop and, well, it wasn't exactly Tinkers to Evers to Chance. (More like Johnson to Nixon to Ford.)
Junior beat out the DP, prompting Stroman to throw a four-alarm, toad-licker, hissy fit, which seemed to be directed at current team whipping mule Gleyber Torres. The prosecution lasted about 30 seconds - a lifetime on YES - then Stroman walked another batter, got the Boonie hook, and was left to scream in the dugout like Al Pacino in "And Justice for All," which I promise is the final '70s image in this post.
Two innings later, Gleyber homered, prompting YES/WNBA play-by-play announcer Ryan Ruocco - freed for the night from sucking Caitlin Clark's perfumed toes - to shout "GLEYBER TORRES, WELCOME BACK!" This launched the YES team's nightly "big-hit-that-could-snap-him-out-of-his- slump" jubilation protocol.
Let's hope. Last night, after the mystery tongue-lashing, Gleyber delivered: 2 for 4 with 3 RBIs. So did DJ LeMahieu - 1 for 4 with his first extra base hit of 2024, which was greeted like Travis Kelsey keg-lifting Taylor - and Alex Verdugo's 2-for 5. They weren't exactly Mazeroski: The Yanks scored 7 in the 9th, padding numbers in a 16-5 laugher.
Today, here's where everything stands.
Baltimore has won three straight, Boston has a canned tomato scent, Tampa will surely soon launch a sell-off, and - despite their hate-fueled win Thursday - the Blue Jays look ready to tank.
A split won't work. The Yankees need to win a series. It feels like a lifetime, just to the all-star break. God knows what set off Stroman - fuel for his next literary effort? - but let's hope his tantrum becomes a meaningful date on the 2024 calendar, like the turning point it seemed to prompt last night.
"This launched the YES team's nightly "big-hit-that-could-snap-him-out-of-his- slump" jubilation protocol. "
ReplyDeleteMore duque gold. I can almost see the checklist.
ReplyDeleteI was already screaming, for a month. Do I get any credit?
RIP Martin Mull
ReplyDeleteRIP: Orlando Cepeda
ReplyDeleteRIP: 2024
RIP: VAN WINKLE
I saw visions of Phil Linz with his harmonica being confronted by Yogi.
ReplyDeleteThat's a 60s reference.
I'll light a match for Orlando Cepeda.
ReplyDeleteI'll throw a handful of dirt on these, our 2024 Yankees.
Carl, one difference is no one told Gleyber to play like he didn't care. He did that all by hisself.
Reflux - what is your favorite type of Cabot cheese?
ReplyDeleteCarl - If the hot dog and burger joint is still on Route 1 - a half mile or so west of Damascus road - please go have a hot dog and a Foxon Park white birch beer for me today.
Thanks
Rufus, light one up for Martin Mull while you're at it.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure he would encourage you to interpret that any way you want.
JM,
ReplyDeleteYou are of course correct. My favorite memory of him was on Johnny Carson. A skit that started "I don't want to brag, but hey -- *I've* been to Europe." Followed by a 'bi-lingual' song. He sits down, puts a checkered table cloth on his lap and a cluster of grapes on the neck of his guitar. "I'll sing the first verse in English and the second in French" The second verse was entirely la-la, la-la-la...
Plus the English part of the lyrics had "I'm an asshole, but you -- You're an asshole, too." A sweet love song.
AA,
My favorite Cabot is extra sharp cheddar, as sold by Henry's Meat Market. They age it another year in their basement.
But my favorite cheese is blue.
Martin Mull. One of my favorites. He was part of a shift in comic sensibility that rippled for decades. RIP. :(
ReplyDeleteAA...do you mean The Hornets Nest? I think before that it was Augies. In the complex with the record store Exile on Main Street and the tuxedo rental place? In any event, I'd only eat a veggie dog or burger.
ReplyDeleteAlso, Friendly's in Branford closed about a dozen years ago because the landlord tripled the rent. But the joke is on them because after a year or so of vacancy, several diners have opened and closed in that spot. Reminds me of the spot that used to be Pasta Fair on Route 1. At least a dozen places have opened and closed in 25 years, some only lasting months.
Do you still have family in town?
It is impossible for me to think of anyone funnier than Mull and Fred Willard on the "2 Night" shows in the 70s. Better than a Stroman meltdown.
ReplyDeleteDoug, if you mean shows like Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman, I couldn't watch that because I couldn't tolerate Louise Lasser's voice or face. She looked like a female Alfred E. Neuman with pigtails and a high-pitched Long Island voice.
ReplyDeleteAnd Joyce Dewitt was much hotter than Suzanne Somers. It was a classic Maryann or Ginger redux.
ReplyDeleteMary Ann, all the way. Though maybe if Ginger had ever worn shorts and a cut-off top...
ReplyDeleteIt's the age old question -- Are you renting for the hour, or the day?
ReplyDeleteIt's about time someone screamed at Gleyber to wake the fuck up.
ReplyDeleteWait. Isn't that the manager's job?
Dick, Dick, Dick —- but there really isn’t a manager
ReplyDeleteI honestly didn’t know what doo-rag boy was yelling about. I guess the relay could’ve been faster, but it’s hardly the most egregious thing Torres has done. Give credit to Guerrero for busting it down the line, something 90% of our team would not do.
ReplyDeleteCarl,
ReplyDeleteFernwood Tonight for starters. The first fake talk show. Louise Lasser wasn't a part of it. But Fred Willard was.
Martin Mull's comedy career is long and glorious.
BTR: He didn't get to a gettable ground ball earlier in the inning that would have changed its whole tenor. The second DP ball was just the straw that broke the camel's back.
ReplyDeleteOk, thanks Doug.
ReplyDeleteJoyce De-halfwitt as SCTV portrayed her. There’s an 80’s reference.
ReplyDeleteSCTV was always funnier and wittier than SNL. I will die on that hill.
Jordan Montgomery’s recent line : 1.98 WHIP in his last seven starts. A 6.03 ERA on the season. 45 strikeouts in 65 2/3 innings pitched.
ReplyDeleteThe value of ST for pitchers should never be overlooked.
While the emergence of Volpe has improved Yankee fielding fortunes, they continue to demonstrate they can't turn a double play! Look at the past 30 years:
ReplyDeleteYear Rank Yanks Best Team
2024 23 137 213 CO
2023 22 291 418 CO
2022 30 248 449 CO
2021 24 282 366 STL
2020 28 85 190 KC
2019 11 336 423 CO
2018 30 231 420 CHW
2017 30 240 443 LAA
2016 28 283 471 TX
2015 24 319 473 TX
2014 29 310 438 TX
2013 26 325 452 ATL
2012 24 310 458 CHW
2011 21 318 411 STL
2010 7 388 448 MN
2009 26 314 436 STL
2008 27 310 465 CLE
2007 3 430 463 LAA
2006 22 356 477 TX
2005 17 352 500 PIT
2004 25 324 450 PIT
2003 29 288 469 DET
2002 29 289 437 ATL
2001 25 348 557 KC
2000 28 349 503 CHW
1999 27 348 541 TB
1998 20 386 517 CO
1997 13 411 555 CO
1996 20 383 515 OAK
1995 22 327 509 MIL
The only outliers in these years are 2019, 2010, 2007 and 1997. In these years the Yankee version of Tinkers to Evers to Chance were:
2019 - Gregorius, Torres, Voit
2010 - Jeter, Cano, Texeira
2007 - Jeter, Cano and a committee of (in order of innings) Mientkiewicz, Phillips, Phelps, Cairo, Giambi, Betemit, Duncan, Damon (and a couple of one-offs)
1997 - Jeter, Sojo/Kelly/Duncan/etc., Martinez
The other 26 years, they've been in the bottom 1/3 or last in the majors for turning a double play! I used to say when I taught college that if one kid got it wrong, it was their fault. But if everyone got it wrong, it was my fault.
Looking at you, Brian, your stats department and all your fielding coaches for the past 30 years. Do you not teach how to field as a team? Or do you not teach fielding at all?
Okay, I'm done now. Marcus, I feel for you.
I forgot one
ReplyDelete2005 - Jeter, Cano, Martinez
Okay, 25 years of fielding incompetence out of 30 years of baseball.
Doctor...those stats must be skewed because if a team gives up more hits and walks, then more attempts will lead to more completed DP. You omitted how many attempts the teams had..
ReplyDeleteFor example, your list has CO leading in DP turned the last 3 years. In those 3 seasons, The Rockies were dead last in ERA in all of MLB. So, there definitely is a correlation between how bad a pitching staff is and double plays turned and not necessarily how proficient their middle infielders are. This is an example of how stats and analytics can be twisted.
ReplyDeleteCarl Weitz makes an excellent point. And by the same token, the best hitting teams generally hit into more double-plays; they just have more men on base.
ReplyDeleteBut interesting stats, Doctor T. And especially interesting that the years when the Yanks ranked highest in DPs, Jeter always seemed to be the shortstop—often with some terrible second basemen. Hmmm...
Granted, there's more to a team's collective DP output than the competence of their middle infield and 1st basemen. A team full of strikeout artists will offer fewer opportunities for DP's than a team full of ground ball specialists. The field, stadium and a myriad of other factors play out for differential outcomes.
ReplyDeleteOne might assume a team with a lower WHIP would have fewer chances for DP's, But 3 of the 9 teams with lower WHIP's than the Yankees have more DP's: Guardians, Dodgers & Braves. 2 more (Phillies, Tigers) have the same number of DP's as the Yankees.
One thing all those teams have in common is that their pitchers also induce more ground balls than the Yankees. The Phillies and Dodgers also have lower ERA's, despite the Yankees ranking 4th in that category. Dodgers have more K's (Phillies, 2 less than the Yankees) and both teams
(34 and 30 respectively) gave up far fewer home runs than the Yankees 54.
All 5, except the Tigers, have better fielding % than the Yankees. But then the Yankees made more errors than 24 other teams in baseball. So there's that...