Wednesday, July 10, 2024

Five Ways To Fix The Yankees

It can be done. Just follow these simple steps...

1) Drop Brian Cashman on Nebraska Avenue



Engaging with Tampa Bay street walkers cost the Yankees Steve Swindal and gave us Hal to begin with. They owe us.




2) Trade Juan Soto

He looks like a broken man. The Yankees are no longer fun for him. I haven’t seen him really smile in weeks. He is depressed.

A couple of days ago, instead of being in the jocular conversation with Judge, Rizzo, and Volpe in the dugout he was talking to a coach, and not about his at bat. Just bored chatting and killing time. 

He will not be re-signing with us.

Let’s just admit we’re going nowhere this year and try to build for the future with some kind of haul.

I know. I know. It’s still Cashman making the trade but maybe we do the hooker thing first. We still have a couple of weeks.


3) Fire Boone and Hire?

The first part is easy. Hell, I’ll do it. Give him my cell number. Who replaces him though? 




Stump Merrill is dead. 





Buck Showalter

I’ve seen people suggest Buck Showalter. I’m good with this as it’s going to take at least two years to get the team back to contention and then they can fire him again because, like Moses, Buck don’t make it to the promised land. 

Plus, I would like to see him kick the ass of the various lollygaggers that currently inhabit the Yankee uniforms.

Joe Girardi

I know. I know. We wanted him fired last time but that was then, this is now. He’s already in the building. Familiar with the team and the front office, such as it is, and I would like to see him kick the ass of the various lollygaggers that currently inhabit the Yankee uniforms.

Shelly Duncan

I know very little about Shelly Duncan as a manager other than I would like to see him kick the ass of the various lollygaggers that currently inhabit the Yankee uniforms.

4) Trade Rodon



He doesn’t have it. He will never make it here.  Pay whatever it takes. No walking on eggshells. No worrying about his mental state. No dreading his starts. He’s Ed Whitson Redux. Just ship him out.

Which takes me to the most important one...





5) Stop Acquiring  Losers (See Above Ed Whitson Photo)

The Yankees has virtually no one on the team who knows how to win. Cole. Uh… could that possibly be it?  Time to find guys who know how to do that. 

Last year the Knicks turned around the franchise by adding the Nova guys. They were not the most talented players in the league. Mostly late first and second round picks but they know how to win. They were NCAA champions. They know how to do the little things.  The Yankees should try to trade for undervalued guys like that. 

No more A’s. No more White Sox. No more Angels or Pirates, or Marlins (Cough. Stanton. Cough.) or Cubs. Get me former Astros and Phillies, and even Braves.   

Here's an idea... What NCAA teams won the Men’s College World Series in the last five years? Start trading for those guys.

 


11 comments:

  1. The first step to solving any problem is admitting there is a problem. The Yankees aren’t even there yet.

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  2. "No more A’s. No more White Sox. No more Angels or Pirates, or Marlins (Cough. Stanton. Cough.) or Cubs. Get me former Astros and Phillies, and even Braves" THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU Doug!!!!

    This whole season as you ALL have noted a bazillion times is just repeat of a repeat of a repeat of the same failures ad nauseam, time for real change,,,, I know I know, not in our lifetimes!

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  3. Fact remains that Cashman gave up too much for Juan Soto. There was no need to even trade for Soto. They weren't going to win this year. They could've just waited and signed him after this year as a free agent. So bottom line, they gave away four pitchers for nothing. How 'bout that?

    'Course, I heard that the season ticket holders were defecting en masse, abandoning ship during the winter. Which is what got ownership/management off its ass to do something. But what they did was not smart at all. Dumb, dumb, dumb.

    Okay, so they got Soto. So then they should've gone for it by signing at least Hader to be the closer. And dumping Stanton out to pasture. Dumping DJ LeMahieu out to pasture. Dumping Rizzo out to pasture. And bringing up The Martian when it was time. And bringing up Spencer Jones. They could've also traded Torres. Maybe worked another trade with Clarke Schmidt. And early on this year when Rodon was going good, they could've pulled the plug on him and sent him away and got something in return. Did they do any of that? No, of course not. Because then they might actually win.

    What they did do was hang on to all their garbage and then added Marcus Stroman, which appeared to be a halfway decent signing until recently. But now that he's come back down to earth, as expected, we have a full on sinking of the Yankee Titanic disaster, 2024 version.

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  4. They did bring up Ben Rice. I hadn't even heard of him until maybe a few weeks before he came up. So give credit for that. But too little, too late.

    They never seem to do anything with full commitment. That's what drives us nuts. It's always half ass management. Band aids on elephant butts. Waiting 'til the horses are out of the barn. Waiting 'til the house has burned down. The only way to explain it is finances/risk management. They're not doing anything to rock the boat, just kicking the can down the street, all the way to the bank. And there is no end in sight to this piss poor management.

    It's like a once great old mansion that has fallen into severe disrepair, with vines growing everywhere, cracks appearing everywhere. How long will it be before the House of Usher collapses of its own weight? Could be years, decades, centuries. The world might end with no more Yankee championships.

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  5. You won’t get anything for Soto or Rondon because the other teams have good GMs and realize the Yankees have no leverage. They will get 10 cents on the dollar. King, Higgi, Vasquez, Brito and Thorpe (3-1, 3.7 ERA) would be big contributors to this team, but the moron traded them for 1 year rental. It’s too the point to where no real Yankees fan gives a shit about this team

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  6. That Tampa streetwalker looks a lot better than the ones I used to see around Manhattan. Cashman deserves far worse.

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  8. @JM...53rd and 3rd...standing on the street...

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  9. Remember that see from "Patton" when the command post is being strafed? Patton jumps out of the window with his revolver and screams, "By God, I've had enough" and starts shooting at the fighter. Now THAT's a leader we could use! Somebody who will only take so much. Umm, do those kind of men even exist anymore? I mean in this Country.

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  10. Smack Hal in the head, kick him int the Ass. Make him fire Genius Cashman and his moron manager.

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  11. Let me add, when you fire Genius Cashman, give the job to Brian Sabean, whom is good with player development and keep Omar Minaya as the assistent GM.

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