Monday, April 14, 2025

In the early results, the AL has become the League of Extraordinary Tomato Cans

Three weeks in, one finding...

The American League doth sucketh. 

After three weeks of interleague play, yiketh! Not only are the winningest teams from the NL, but last year's AL division champs are struggling to float above .500. 

Last I looked, the Angels - tied for the best AL record - provoke as much hope as the market for Teslas. It's been years since the AL East loomed as MLB's power division. Toronto's talent wave came and went, and Baltimore's might follow suit. For now, the paltry Blue Jays lead, two games above whatever. It's rather sad, actually. 

Over the next month weeks, the imbalance will shrink; that's because the Yankees (8-7) will play amongst themselves, in the league of extraordinary tomato cans. 

With our current staff underwater - (the injury rotation of Cole, Schmidt, Gil and Stroman is superior to that of Fried, Carrasco, Rodon and Warren) - it's hard to imagine the Death Barge getting a leg up on the division. Check out the ERAs from yesterday. Keep in mind, that was a relatively successful game, not a blowout.

As Yank fans, we are preconditioned by a 1,000 years of Zolio Almonte in-breeding to look at box scores from the front nine down, then draw conclusions. This year, you can check the BAs and dream happily. But our pitching is a nightmare, from tonight's starter - Carlos Carrasco - to our shaky closer, Devan Williams. With the fingers-crossed exception of Max Fried, all our starters are lucky to reach the 5th. From there, the bullpen is beans and shoe leather. We're riding with Boxcar Willie. 

Will any AL team emerge? Of course. The Tigers are a surprise. KC will ride Bobby Witt Jr. (.305 with 1 HR.) The O's will rise or fall with Jackson Holliday (.213 with 1 HR.) Boston will ride on the shoulders of three rookies. The Yankees have two youngsters of impact: The Martian (.239 and 1 HR) and Hulkster Rice (.298 and 4.) There's always hope, I guess, as long as everybody else keeps sucking. But it's a dim light, and right now, the tunnel looks rather endless.

17 comments:

  1. I'm getting tired of all the winning.

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  2. 13 B... Yep, they're winning at rates never seen before in this country.

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  3. someone keeps on leaving out the letter h

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  4. Come on People Now
    Fire on Your Brothers
    Everybody Get Together
    Try to - - - - One Another Right Now

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  5. RIP Jesse Colin Young, AA.

    Considering the injuries, we're not doing too badly. Considering the lineup, we're not doing too badly. Considering the weather, we're not doing too badly. Considering our manager, we're not doing too badly.
    Considering our GM, we're not doing too badly. Considering our main owner, we're not doing too badly.

    Considering the rest of baseball, we're doing pretty badly. But, hey, it's early yet. Only April. Plenty of time to get worse.

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  6. For those of you into reggae, Max Romeo died the other day. A sad day.

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  7. Don't become encouraged by what has just happened. Temper expectations.

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  8. This team....is strange...there's Actually a lot to like about the lineup...all there .ops are lot better than last years it's actually more exciting to watch that last years lineup...but their defense is still ass and the pitching is a fuckin tight rope

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  9. Like this Williams asshole, for instance. Glorified garbage time reliever.

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  10. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  11. I can't understand why Boone can't "get" these guys to play better "baseball". Actually, what I really can't understand is why a manager who can't get his players to get their heads out of their asses still has a job. WTF? You know?

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    Replies
    1. Perhaps Kevin Boone needs to watch the ending of Scream and Scream again and be told that his fate will be the same as Vincent Price at the end of that film if he doesn’t win the 2025 WS. Thoughts?

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  12. Remember the way the dogs ended up in "Theater of Blood?"

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