Thursday, May 21, 2020

Virtual Baseball: Yanks Go With What Doesn't Work, Lose to Brews. New Camp Doctors Order Bed Rest for All.

Deciding to give perpetual prospect Luis "Unecessa" Cessa one more shot, the Virtual Yankees were dismayed to see the young pitcher routed against last night, as Milwaukee rolled to a 12-6 victory.

Christian Yelich, the former NL MVP the Brewers grabbed while the Yankees were busy securing the services of their vastly superior outfielder and mystic, Giancarlo Stanton, Yelich hit two towering home runs and a pair of run-scoring singles to lead the team from the Land of Cheese.  Ben Gamel, International League MVP while still a Yankee farmhand, added another home run and two doubles for the Curds and Whey boys.

Luke Voit and Miguel Andujar each homered for the Yankees, who also left 17 men on base.

Elsewhere in the Empire, the new pair of European doctors taking over the Yanks' Legends Rehab Facility in Tampa, urged bedrest for all their patients.

"We recommend that they not only go to bed, but remain completely still there.  The slightest nervous excitement could be injurious to their health," Drs. Behrens and Krokowski told the press in a joint statement.

Asked if this did not constitute an archaic treatment for tuberculosis, Behren and Krokowski replied, "Of course.  This is a tuberculosis clinic, isn't it?"  The doctors also expressed the opinion that most of the reporters present were looking a little green around the grills, and should probably enter the facility for a long bedrest themselves.

Yankees creatures Lonn Trost and Randy Levine both denied any responsibility for hiring the German doctors, and blamed their arrival instead on longtime Yankees batboy Eddie Bennett.

2 comments:

  1. Not sure these new docs are going to work out. I'm kind of surprised they didn't go with Dr. Heiter.

    ReplyDelete

  2. I really want the world to know about this great man who brought back happiness into my life again after my husband left me and the kids 3 years ago for another women online when i contacted Dr Believe he cast a love spell for me within 48 hours my ex husband start calling me and begging for forgiveness for everything that have happened between us. I was so happy to have my family back together with love again here is the email of Dr Believe via believelovespelltemple@gmail.com a man with the great powers you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348156148821
    God bless you
    I am very grateful for your help in my marriage.



    ReplyDelete

Members of the blog can comment. To receive an e-mailed invitation, write to johnandsuzyn@gmail.com. And check spam if it doesn't show up. (Google account required.)

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.