You tell yourself that it cannot get worse...

 ... And then you realize it's not a dream, that you won't wake up, and that the floorboards have a trap door dropping straight into Hell. 

The other day, Chancellor Angela Merkel said the German language has no word to describe the devastation of her flooded homeland. I don't mean to suggest that a sports team's losing streak can compare to the tragedy of so many lost lives, but today, I have no words for the 2021 New York Yankees. 

Really. What can anyone say, other than that this fiasco franchise will be long remembered for brutal, horrifying losses, like yesterday. Few teams have ever brought such disappointment. As far as the Yankees are concerned, global warming cannot flood the coastlines quickly enough. For Yankee fans, it's football season.

Today, are we're supposed to think the return of Aaron Judge and Kyle Higashioka will matter? I sure don't. Are we supposed to look forward to another deadline of Brian Cashman's backfiring deals? I sure don't. 

This team cannot shed the stench of its own mediocrity, a smell so pungent we cannot even enjoy the irony of a No. 3 hitter named Odor.  

For the second time in less than five years, Yankee fans this week must consider rooting against their team, hoping that a few more diabolical losses in Tampa will dissuade Food Stamps Hal and Cooperstown Cashman from trading away the future. Once again, we are chasing the final wild card birth, the brass rail of sports irrelevance. 

Yesterday, even as Domingo German seemed to be pitching a masterpiece, who could truly shed the sense that Boston wouldn't rally to win? You kept wondering... who'll pitch the eighth and ninth? Each stranded baserunner - (I think we should call them "Giancarlos") - the fears deepened. When it finally happened, when the floorboards cracked, all you could do was laugh. 

Wow. Somehow, they did it again. 

Listen: The Redsocks own us. In every phase of the game, from their ballpark's storied past to their farm system's ripping future, they are our master. The Rays also own us, but without the history and with a bit less noise.  

I try to not rip players for their contracts or injuries. Neither is their fault. But mediocrity - that's something else. On that note, I'm starting to think the Yankees must suck up their wallet - as they once did with A-Rod - and make a clean break with Giancarlo Stanton. We need a rebuilding plan, not a surgical tweak. If we trade any prospects in some desperate effort to win the wild card, we will find ourselves in this same wretched spot next year, although then, we will also be chasing Baltimore. 

You tell yourself it cannot get worse...

Well, it can. We just don't have the words.

Series Wrap-up

After battling and scuffling for four games.

After great pitching and laughable failure:

1.  They stole two games

2.  We stole one game

3.  They won another that wasn't stolen.

So we took 1 of 4.  About par for the course.

Dramatic win keeps Yanks from passing Toronto in Tankathon standings

 It felt nice, but we've seen this before. 

Not ready to buy into this team's comeback spirit.

Photo: Omar Robinson @Piff131

 

Any Info?

Gary Sanchez left yesterday's game in the 6th inning (?), replaced by Rob Brantley.

Brantley is starting today's game.

I can't get any information on Gary from anywhere.

I didn't keep watching the game because, when a rookie ( making his debut ) struck out three Yankees with the bases loaded, I realized there was no point watching Cole suffer. 

And I have now conceded that none of the Yankees recently elevated from Scranton have any future  in the game.

The Boston phenom is, indeed, a phenom.

But we have Jessica Dominguez, who is better than Mantle.

 

Excitement brewing about Yankee team in Dominican Summer League

They recently rolled up 21 runs in a tough 22-21 loss to their Dominican Summer League rivals, the Dominican Summer League Mariners.

The team stole 10 bases, recorded 13 hits and 19 walks, going 8-29 with runners in scoring position!

All 22 players who came to the plate, including scrubs, reached base.

Looks like the Yankees should be stocked by 2026!

Yankee loss elevates team to 19th in next year's draft

It's time to tank.

Text of the day

 From Mustang...

"I am never shopping at Kresge's again."

Thank God....

 ....Boone saved Chappy for tonight, when we'll be down seven runs.

....that someone publicly insulted the Rays by saying they, " just acquired their Stanton ( Cruz )."

....that Gleyber only gets a few ground balls per game.

....that July 31 can't come soon enough.

I just want to remind everyone that this team was always destined, at best, to the play-in game of the wild card episode. 

( Despite the lies from Yankee central that " this team is built for winning the World Series.")

Lying is a sin.

God said so.

Ask the fucking painting. 

What if...

If we had not blown four games in the last inning during the past month, several with amazingly large leads going in, we would be 54-41.

We would be four games out of first. And only three in the all-important loss column.  Since last night's fuckup was against Boston, we'd be three games out and two in the loss column.

None of us would be hanging our heads in shame and anger because we're Yankees fans.

This year's Yankees team is the Anti-Jeter squad

 When Derek Jeter retired, and Keith Olbermann and the stats folks rolled out Excel spreadsheets showing the Jeet's fWarOPQ+/~¿EIEIO ratio ranked his career equal to Wayne Tolleson, I made a comment on a post to say that those folks were missing the point. Jeter was about moments, and how he had a knack for being part of so many special plays and memories that you could not measure with whatever supercomputer you want to trot out.

This team is the anti-Jeter. The season is being defined not by the team's win-loss record, but by the ever-increasing number of "What the fuck just happened?" moments.

You look at the numbers, and Boone and Cashman will bring up their spreadsheets and say that this team is pretty good. Hey, it's 5 games OVER .500! It's still in the playoff chase! We're just a 42-year-old right-handed DH away from being a World Series contender.

But it's not the record. I've never seen a team blow so many games, so horrendously, with such maddening incompetence. Just when you think it can't get any worse, someone else steps up and says, "hold my fifth of tequila." 

The awful extra-inning blown-third-strike loss against the Red Sox. Chapman's implosions against the Mets and Angels. The debacle against the Astros. After each one, it was loudly proclaimed that the Yankees had "hit rock bottom."

Each time, we all thought "it couldn't possibly get any worse."

And then there was last night. The bunch of no-names was starting to generate some buzz, getting our hopes up that we would have something to root for. It was all a tease. Green blew the save, of course. (Where have you gone, Mariano?) The Yankees scored the "ghost runner" in spite of themselves, and Stanton had the worst at-bat in the history of baseball (swinging at two pitches that didn't come close to reaching the plate). Then Kriske's epic performance, throwing an incredible four wild pitches (all of which Stanton would have swung at). MLB's stats folks immediately noted that it was a record for most wild pitches in an extra inning in history. I assume it also set the record for most TV screens kicked in. Boone had the audacity in the presser to mention the "big strikeout" of Martinez that Kriske got.  

And again, it's said that the Yankees have "hit rock bottom." Eventually, you have to admit that this team hasn't hit rock bottom, it has set up camp there.

And so, the anti-Jeter season goes on. The YES Network folks will shake their heads sadly, but tell us that things will get better. By now, we know better. At this point, the only thing we can do is wonder what could possibly happen next. 

This is a team only a masochist could love. 

The season didn't end last night, but the Yankees' quest for the AL East did

We're not cows, right? If the Jumbotron says, "MOO," we don't "moo." We're thinking fans.

And we have personal limits of self-abuse, right? We do not subject ourselves to methods of enhanced self-interrogation, such as waterboarding or reading the Daily Mail. We are Yankee fans - not a doomsday cult. 

I want that understood. We are not Met fans, Jet fans, Knick fans... once upon a time, we rooted for the marquee team in all of baseball. Under the rules of the Geneva Convention, we do not allow self-torture. 

That said, we are dying here. Hand in the blender. Can somebody turn it off? Eleven days after the worst loss of the season - a horror show ninth against Houston - we topped it last night. You can say the common denominator is Chad Green, but he's not alone. To paraphrase Hillary, it takes a franchise to raise a debacle. It's the trimmings - the botched grounders, the lunging swings, the pitches to the backstop - that turn victories into PTSD flashbacks. Chad Green isn't a closer, that's all. The real question: Why was he out there? 

Nope. I'm not staggering down that path...  No self-torture! That's my motto. They cannot hurt us anymore, because we are already dead. 

So, it's a last-birth-in-the-wild-card season, now. It always was. We just didn't know it. I personally shall spend the next eight days wondering if we're not better off losing. The great fear now is that Cooperstown Cashman, in a desperate quest to keep his job, will make some generationally horrible trades, like the ones that got us here. 

Today, the Yankiverse pulses with rumors that Cashman will drain the farms for a Trevor Story or a Jose Ramirez. Whatever he does, the YES men - that is, the Yankee- owned media - will quickly applaud it as the work of genius, and the team will chase that last birth, the carrot on the stick for middling mediocrity - for teams who don't know enough to tank. 

Last night, the Rays traded for Nelson Cruz. Soon, Boston will activate Chris Sale. The Yankees? We look forward to the return of Nestor Cortez. 

I can't take much more of this. Right now, let's just hope Cashman sticks to the one thing he has historically mastered: Scouring the scrap heaps for talent. Let's direct all our juju towards jamming up his phone, so he cannot make another midsummer, decade-killing blockbuster.  

"Moo?" Fuck that. I say, "Boo." 

The message of the modern day New York Yankees... in four simple words

 "You cannot buy hunger."

Just Had To Say It...

 Finally, this team is fun to watch.

Again.

Greg Allen lighting it up and running the bases.

Florial showing he cares.  And running the bases.

Gary being a steady player with power.

Odor hitting third.

Torres re-emerging ( even with that leaky glove) and hitting to right field.

LaMarre playing like it is a hockey game. 

Wojo on the hill with no chance at all.

DJ having fun with the grand kids. 

We are winning with chutzpah and speed.

Win or lose.  

It is a much better watch. 

We can trade those other guys.

Comment of the night

 

Zack and El Chapo better get their acts together soon - (like, beginning tonight)

 

Okay, here we go... 

Fenway. Four games. Two on national TV. A divisional race at stake. This time, the nutjobs will be throwing balls at our outfielders, spitting at our wives. Whatever lights blink in centerfield, they won't be from this planet. Moreover, the bullpen guards will want to fight. 

We still have time to catch Boston, but not if we blow this. Nope. Lose this weekend, and the AL East is  Tampa's and Boston's to luxuriate over. The Death Barge will spend another August/ September chasing the final wild card slot - the NYC equivalent of Hogwart's Golden Snidget. 

Also at stake: The existential future of this franchise. For better or worse, the front office seems determined to wade deeper into Big Muddy - trading prospects for immediate help at the Aug. 1 deadline. A few wins in Boston could amplify that madness - even as the victories might come, ironically, via the prospects they eventually trade. (Estevan Florial, Hoy Park... farewell?) 

But topping our Official List of Current Yankee Nightmares is the bullpen, once touted as baseball's best. Unless Jonathan "Patient Zero" Loaisiga returns with full command - (many don't, after quarantining two-weeks) - the Yankees have no late-inning option beyond the doe-eyed warhorse, Chad Green, and whomever just Uber'ed-in from Central Pa. To beat Boston, somebody must pitch the ninth. That's a problem.

Since returning from his latest tweak, Zack Britton has pitched in three games. Three. He has yet to throw a scoreless inning. Last night, a booted grounder by Gleyber Torres opened the floodgates, but suddenly Britton - an 11-year vet - could not throw strikes. The three-run lead vanished, and all we had was the disappointing Nick Nelson - he, of the plus-9.00 ERA. It's hard to imagine the Yankees succeeding in Fenway without Britton. It's now or  never.

Last night, Aroldis Chapman pitched a scoreless inning, with his customary leadoff walk and 10 near heart attacks. He later picked off the runner, so there's that. But it's no way to survive - walking them and picking them off. On June 6, El Chapo's ERA stood at 0.39; he was enjoying the greatest season of his 12-year career. Today, it stands at 4.28. That, my friends, is a fucking meltdown. 

In the last four outings since his pre-All-Star nervous breakdown, Chapman he has given up only one run. Still, every inning seemed to last 1,000 years. Last night, after El Chapo recorded the final out, Michael Kay giddily shouted, "THE STARE IS  BACK!" referring to the glare Chapman gives vanquished batters. Maybe. But I still see Chapman staring into The Abyss. And when you stare into the Abyss... well, we know what Freddie Nietzsche had to say about that, right? 

The Abyss stares back. 

We can't beat Boston without Britton and Chapman climbing out of The Abyss. Right now, they remain differing versions of a train wreck. They have today to figure it out. 

Pssst: Gerrit Cole is having a Cy Young season

 

Biting A Bullet

 After a pitcher of " Sidecars" and a bag of M&M Peanuts, here is what I would do.

Bite the bullet and;

1.  Give Centerfield to Florial

2.  Give left field to Allen ( is he related to Richie Allen of the old Phillies?)

3.  Give first base to Gittens

4.  Give second to DJ

5.  Keep Gary at catcher, and Torres and Urshela at their spots. 

Play ball.

A Couple Of Thoughts...

1) Sometimes The Jokes Just Write Themselves

Boone on Florial “He’s got loads of talent,” manager Aaron Boone said. “Tonight he was really good. … Hopefully he can continue to give us that shot in the arm.”

You know what else would have given the Yankees, "A Shot In The Arm"? 

2)  Trader Schmo 

Mr. Duque recommends that we stand pat and there is a lot of wisdom to the argument. I'm more of a damned if we do, damned if we don't type guy. Especially with Trader Schmo calling the shots. 

That said, we have to watch this collection of chuckleheads for the rest of the year. (And let's face it, for the rest of our lives) so I say trade away... with one caveat. 

Only players that are already on the 26 man roster and the IL. That way we don't hurt the future and we give ourselves new people to eventually hate. Plus, the guys who just came up get to stay. 

We also get to keep the current crop of future disappointments. 

Mr. Duque feels we don't have cards to play. I'm thinking it's about packaging. For example a team that's out of it and looking to next year, such as KC  might be interested in...  

The Mashers From M*A*S*H

We take Clint "Fastest Swing in the West" Frazier (Who sadly plays in the East), Aaron "He's Under Par" Hicks, and Luke "The Body" Voit  and put them all in a package for one good uh... anything.  The team we trade to gets THREE bonified major leaguers. (Eventually).  

It's quite a package...  A Gold Glove nominee (Like I said above, sometimes the jokes write themselves.) the reigning Home Run Champ and, an on-base machine!  

We get a player worth watching right now. 

Bullpen-A-Lose-A

Chapman has a history of failing in big games. But what if he was traded to a team that doesn't play in big games? All we need back is a good pitcher who can handle the 5th and 6th. (Because our starters only go 4-5).  They get a top closer we get a pitcher to bridge to Greene. It's a win-win. Toss in some money to pay half of Chappy's salary and get a top 10 Minor Leaguer from their organization. 

A top closer AND money? Who wouldn't go for that? 

 

Heading into the trade deadline, the Yankees basically have no cards to play

Every morning, a parade of cooing headlines touts possible Yankee trade targets, as our boys pursue that magical, final AL wild card slot. (We're four games behind Oakland, one behind Seattle and tied with Toronto.) Commonly, we see names like Marte and Gallo and Story (oh my!) coming to the Yankees at prices that only make sense to toad-lickers. 

Any major deal to shore up their sore spots - the rotation, bullpen and outfield - will come at a price tag that chases Cooperstown Cashman into the caves of Connecticut. With his job on the line - which it might just be - he cannot afford a bum trade.  

Unless the ghost of Syd Thrift inhabits some GM's body, nobody is going to give us decent value for Voit, Frazier, Andujar, Gardner, Gleyber or Stanton - all of whom are season-long disappointments. The few players coveted by other teams happen to represent the future of the Yankees. 

For example, Estevan Florial clearly isn't ready now - he's a .190 hitter with far too many Ks - but in three years, (he'll be 26), his speed and power could make him a solid CF. Likewise, several infielders have had breakout summers in our farm system. But trading them - that's how the Yankees got into this mess. 

It's hard to see the 2021 Yankees winning anything meaningful in October. But if we're thinking of a sell-off - what's the point of trading players at their lowest value? We're better off waiting until winter. 

On that note, a suggestion: Stand the fuck pat. 

Old Rumsfeld may be gone - and good riddance! - but the guy had it right: 

You go to war with the army you have. This is the 2021 Yankees. This is the army we have. 

Let's consider our problems: 

Rotation: Cole is great, maybe even Cy Young. Tailon and Montgomery remain quirky. Severino might return; nobody holds their breath. Cory Kluber? A longshot. Mike King? Meh. We have spare parts at Scranton, nobody sticks out. (Deivi Garcia has completely tanked, and Clarke Schmidt looks like a wipeout.) To get Max Scherzer, we'd have to trade Yankee Stadium. We're better off rolling the dice with Cessa and Nasty Nestor (Octavio) Cortez. Most of all, we don't need another Sonny Gray. 

Bullpen: O'Day is o-done. Loaisiga should soon return. Let's face it: El Chapo either conquers his demons this weekend at Fenway, or this season is over. The last key is Zack Britton. If he could return to form, we still have a bullpen. But late July is when teams love to trade us lug nuts who had a nice first half and are ready to implode. Must we do this again?

Outfield: Judge returns soon. (And everybody better be fucking vaccinated; anybody who isn't - I don't care who - should be sent home.) Don't we love the speed and hustle of Greg Allen? For kricesakes, put him in CF, fulltime. Make LF a mash-up of Gardy, Stanton, LaMarre, Andujar and Frazier (assuming he returns; I think there's a chance he's done for the year.) Yeah, Stanton must play LF now and then. Frankly, I don't care if he gets hurt. We're a 4th place team with him. We can be a 4th place team without him. If he plays OF, we have a better chance of trading him next winter.

You go to the war with the army you have. Cashman built this army. Trades cannot save this team.