Saturday, May 8, 2021

Saturday Afternoon Live... IT IS HIGH Threadheads unite

 


89 comments:

HoraceClarke66 said...

Weirdly, the Mets and Yankees are playing in the same city today. The Mets are playing, the Yanks have the tarp on the field.

HoraceClarke66 said...

So yeah, having a staff made up mostly of pitchers who have trouble going five innings has led to the bullpen already starting to wear out in May.

Hmm, who could have predicted that? Oh, right!

Just wait until September.

HoraceClarke66 said...

My bad. SNY was just re-running last night's game.

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Can we take bets for when we’ll see a baseball game?

No, “they haven’t payed real baseball since 1969 and never will again. “ is not an acceptable answer.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Hilarious, Beauregard!

Hey, it's just the routine mistreatment of the modern fan. Wait two hours for the rain delay to end.

HoraceClarke66 said...

So, our lineup today features a No. 4 hitter with 0 home runs on the season and a .234 average; a No. 5 hitter with 0 home runs and a .200 average, and a No. 7 hitter who is batting .091.

(Yes, Miggy is back on the bench. Yes, I am sure he will soon regain that major-league swing playing a game once a week or so.)

HoraceClarke66 said...

They just announced it: first pitch in 45 minutes.

So those fans who stick around will have spent at least 2 1/2 hours on a freezing afternoon, waiting for a game to get underway.

The front office, the players, the announcers are all somewhere warm and comfortable. The fans sit out in the cold, paying extortionate prices for bad food copiously laced with rat droppings, while ads are blared at them at ear-splitting decibel levels.

Gee, I wonder how it is that baseball is losing popularity?

DickAllen said...


Count your blessings. Hicks is not in the lineup today. May his cramps persist!

At least until next month.

TheWinWarblist said...

Ah the glory of rain delay theatre dysentery.

DickAllen said...

BUT...

The Genius of Aaron Boone has Gardner batting fifth.

What a manager.

Never thought I would hear myself say: "Can't wait for Luke Voit to show up."

JM said...

Looking at that photo, do you think the Master is related to Lewis Black?

TheWinWarblist said...

The weird thing about last night was the rehabilitation project who started the game and pitched to a mediocre level, was our pitching star last night. And yes, I am intentionally ignoring Whatshisname cause I'm still hurt over the departure of my TuchusMan.

TheWinWarblist said...

Once more: Does August 18th work for everyone? We should all be vaccinated by then and restrictions lifted.

JM said...

Yes for me. Every day being much like every other.

Ken of Brooklyn said...

Yes Winnie, count me in for Aug 18th!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Works for me!

13bit said...

Barring and act of God or Satan, I should be able to come. How we going to work this fiasco?

HoraceClarke66 said...

Simply brilliant play today.

Mike Ford, after a mental mistake in the field that led to a run, strikes out to go to 3-34 on the year.

Hey, at least he shaved his moustache!

Ken of Brooklyn said...

HIGGYBURGER!!!!!!!!!!!!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Only question today is if Scherzer will pitch a no-hitter (or a perfect game). Michael Kay keeps inviting the juju gods by talking incessantly about all the no-hitters so far.

HoraceClarke66 said...

But...HIGGY!

Love me some Higgy.

JM said...

Higgy is so obviously the superior catcher in every respect. Sanchez should just be traded.

HoraceClarke66 said...

So, two walk and three strikeouts in that inning. With two of the K's called third strikes.

This reminds me of when I was a kid and no one was around to play ball, and I would just throw a ball against a fence, seeing how many I could throw for "strikes."

"Baseball: Come spend $100 on the same game you could make up as a kid!"

HoraceClarke66 said...

Judge looks lost.

TheWinWarblist said...

Bitty, I'm just the ideas person. Now I need you and LBJ to do all the work getting the tickets.

TheWinWarblist said...

I'll pay for tickets for whoever does everything!!

HoraceClarke66 said...

4 innings, 10 strikeouts. Yeah, I'm really glad we never even tried to get this Scherzer guy when he was a free agent. It would have got tired, celebrating all those World Series wins.

TheWinWarblist said...

Judge strikes out on a ball out of the strike zone. Torres strikes out on a ball in the strike zone. Gardner strikes out looking on a ball in the strike zone. Multitude ways of ineptitude.

Leinstery said...

10 strikeouts through 4 innings. Holy Shit are they unwatchable.

How much longer can the Yankees and MLB keep the charade up that Judge is one of the best in the sport?

HoraceClarke66 said...

Judge looks awful. And he often has, for some time now.

Nice finish by Kluber. All right, all right, a decent outing all-in-all. But 2 runs in 5 2/3 with potentially another run out there? Not exactly his old self.

This is not a clutch team. It's not a team with good fundamentals in any sense of the word.

And now Chad Green is on. Sigh.

TheWinWarblist said...

Keep pitching Green until his arm falls off. No worries if he's ineffective down the stretch. We won't be in the running for a playoff spot.

TheWinWarblist said...

Gardner is done. He will always be a great and true Yankee. He should retire now. Have one more trip around the league, get his goodbyes in and watch the second half of the season at home where he can't do anymore damage.

ranger_lp said...

That 2-1 score seems like 9-1…

Joe Formerlyof Brooklyn said...


They were mostly NOT hitting in spring training. "It'll come," I said to myself.

They mostly did NOT hit in April. "Maybe later," I said to myself.

NOW: I am no longer talking to myself. If the NYY pitchers aren't near-perfect -- all the way thru ALL of the bullpenners -- we ain't got a chance.

JM said...

If Boone let's Ford bat in the right, he should be fired.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Nah, Warbler. Don't send Gardy home. Make him a coach. Maybe make him the third base coach where, unlike Phil Nevin, he could successfully wave a runner home without getting him injured.

HoraceClarke66 said...

JM, that's like saying I should fire my Apple for my next typo.

TheWinWarblist said...

Hoss, just so long as Gardner never gets another at bat.



Ford! Ford! He's our man! If he can't do it ... AND HE WON"T DO IT BECAUSE HE'S TERRIBLE! HE'S NOT A MAJOR LEAGUE CALIBER PLAYER!! WHY IS HE HITTIG!!

FUCK YOU BOONE!!! FUCK YOU BOONE!!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Un-fucking-believable. .086.

Hey, lefty-righty match-up!

Who wants to bet Ford exceeds expectations here and hits into a DP?

HoraceClarke66 said...

And Chapman is up. Boy, that's optimism!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Washington had the shift on against Ford, which I think was insane. He was as likely to hit an opposite-field dribbler as anything else.

TheWinWarblist said...

To think I sent my warbling pants to the cleaners for this ...

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Tawny Kitaen died :(

HoraceClarke66 said...

And Stanton takes a swing at ball three, from a guy who can't get the ball over the plate.

TheWinWarblist said...

Great. A "rally." Now they are intentionally fucking with us.

TheWinWarblist said...

GELYBER!!! IT'S A GLEYBER SIGHTING!!! A HIT!! A PALBAPLE HIT!!

HoraceClarke66 said...

I dunno. I think LeMahieu should have taken more of a risk on that...

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Boone wants to lose the game.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Nice!! And glad our runners were able to advance on that single.

Oh, good Lord, it's Hick!

HoraceClarke66 said...

A break from the ump!

HoraceClarke66 said...

And now the make-up call...

HoraceClarke66 said...

I guess that was a brain cramp.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Pathetic

HoraceClarke66 said...

I know Hicks was just coming off the bench and all that. But with the game on the line you cannot go up there and swing at 1 pitch in 4. He was lucky he wasn't called out on three straight pitches.

And now Frazier takes the first two strikes...

HoraceClarke66 said...

Awful, awful hitting. And now comes bullshit-ball.

If Stanton is patient there, we win the game.

Platoni said...

Three good games against the minor league Tigers and two more against a hated opponent, do not make this a good team

HoraceClarke66 said...

And of course, this is the day Chapo has nothing.

Anonymous said...

They truly suck!

Doug K. (somewhere in Missouri)

HoraceClarke66 said...

One run handed to them on a mental error. One run detracted from us because of impatience at the plate...after watching legions of called strikes float by.

Bad clutch pitching, worse clutch hitting.

All in all, a team that once again showed up looking like it would rather not show up.

TheWinWarblist said...

What just happened? What just happened? I'm not prepared to warble! I'm not! I'M PISSED OFF AND POUTING!! THESE FUCKERS - WHO ARE SUPPOSED TO BE YANKEES - ARE NOT ALLOWED TO TIE UP THE GAME, MUCH LESS WIN!! FUCK THEM!! FUCK YOU FORD!! GO BACK TO LOSING YOU FUCKING LOSERS!!



FUCKERS!!!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Wait, what's going on? Some big-ass pigs just flew by my window.

HoraceClarke66 said...

There are also strange, chilly drafts coming up through that weird portal in the basement...

ranger_lp said...

Voit will be here next week so we won’t have Ford to kick around no more…

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Boone batted Hicks as a PH.

Then he got worse.

ranger_lp said...

We have to score a run here…heart of the lineup…

HoraceClarke66 said...

I would red-light Judge on everything. This guy can't find the plate all of a sudden.

ranger_lp said...

Rainey’s got nothing…

HoraceClarke66 said...

Paulie just called Judge "Aaron Hicks." Paging Dr. Freud, paging Dr. Freud...

HoraceClarke66 said...

This would be a great spot for a Baltimore chop.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Baseball is gone.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Washington going to just two outfielders. All we need is a bloop!

HoraceClarke66 said...

yes. yay.

Anonymous said...

This is the greatest Yankee team ever!!!!

Doug K. (Somewhere in Missouri)

HoraceClarke66 said...

Paul O'Neill speaking truth: contact makes things happen.

The pitcher should have let Starlin take that one. But hey: a win is a win is a win.

Glad most of all for those people who sat out the last 6 1/2hours.

TheWinWarblist said...

Thuh Yankees win.



JM said...

I am astounded.

TheWinWarblist said...

FUUUUUCKERS!!!!!!

el duque said...

That was a big Yankee win.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Meredith asking Gleyber "how much of a grind it was today," what with the rain delay, Scherzer, and extra innings.

Stop. Enough. Fourteen months into the pandemic, these young millionaires having to sit around a couple extra hours in their luxurious clubhouse, face a great pitcher, and play a couple extra innings is not a grind. It's a slightly longer, slightly tougher day at the office. Which is, after all, a playground.

She should have gone and asked a couple fans that question.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

She should have asked the fans behind the plate not paying attention to the game in the 10th.

ranger_lp said...

We should have lost this game...good omen?

TheWinWarblist said...

Every Yankee win is a big Yankee win, but they didn't have to put us through that.


Fuckers.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Goodbye, Tawny Kitaen.

You were never the same after the plastic surgery.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Tawny, we hardly knew ye.

No, really, sorry she was so disturbed, and sorry she put poor old Chuck Finley through so much.

But can I also say: Tom Hanks is a force of nature. People he did movies, TV shows and whatever with in a different era have now retired, died, been reincarnated, etc. And he still goes on, an American icon.

Helen Hunt, where is her career? Peter Scolari? Meg Ryan? Melanie Griffith? Mary Steenburgen, Robin Wright, Gary Sinise, Sally Field???

I mean empires have fallen—and been put back together—and Tom Hanks marches on. Was he in films with Greta Garbo? Did he have an affair with Sophia Loren?

On he goes...

Kevin said...

As all of you know, we could have had Scherzer, Corbin, and Verlander on our staff (staph?) at a "reasonable" price. Instead we have to listen to that SOB Hal 'splaining to us that it's Championships are sweeter when bought for as little possible. Not the price that fans pay for tickets and merch, just what he pays. What would it take for sports fans in this Country to go on strike? Sorry, I need to take more peyote and come back to earth.

All of the above isn't enough griping, but gawwwd Meredith gets on my nerves really quickly. Another Hal money saving move I imagine.

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Hal’splaining... Is a new and accurate word!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Very true, Kevin. Not to mention Chris Sales, who could have been had for the price of Yoan Moncada.

But you know, much as we rightly ridicule Food Stamps Hal, the Yanks do have a pretty big payroll.

The trouble, again and again, is that HAL listened to Brain. "Get Sonny Gray, not Verlander!" Etc., etc., etc.

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