Five straight, and five more to go against the finest tomatoes the West Coast has to can. I cannot remember when a Cali road trip seemed so inviting. Hon joo, Hollywood! I'll take the 405 to Sepulveda...
Takeaways from last night:
1. In the buildup to Harrison Bader's looming first walk on Planet Earth - (a small step for man, a giant leap for Brian Cashman) - here's yet another reason to fling our feces at that trade.
Oswaldo Cabrera might just hit his way into the starting lineup, forcing another dilemma. Would Cash force the playing of a high-profile acquisition - Bader - over a rookie? (Why am I asking. Of course he would.)
Last night, the switch-hitting Oswaldo - (he's already earned First Name Status; sorry Oswald Peraza) - delivered three hits, including a triple. When/If Mister Bader returns, Cabrera will presumably march to the bench and disappear. Was he really even here? It reminds me of Croninberg's 1986 rendition of The Fly, when Jeff Goldblum says, "I'm an insect who dreamt he was a man and loved it. But now the dream is over." That movie didn't turn out well, eh? Let's hope Bader doesn't start dissolving his food with spittle.
2. If the Yankees were to lose adorable sparkplug catcher Jose Trevino, who rolled around in agony last night after fouling a ball off his big toe, along with the abject sense that the universe is toying with us, it would pose an interesting possibility.
Presumably, the Yankees would turn to Ben Rortvedt - the 24-year-old, defense-first catcher who was a linchpin in last winter's Gary Sanchez trade. Rortvedt - dubbed Benny Biceps for his weight room curls, has gotten to know Scranton this year, following multiple tweaks of gristle and sinew. It's not as if he's broken down fences: He's hitting .188 with two HRs in 96 at bats. But Rortvedt brings one advantage: He hits left-handed.
3. Yank fans have always been elite influencers, godlike entities who stand as vanguards of major cultural movements. But last night, in a dizzying phone call that I'm not sure he'll remember, Alphonso followed up on the recent beer-straw-hot dog incident by vowing to drink his brewery nectar via a straw inserted into - gulp - a hamburger.
Somebody, anybody, do something. (But don't wake me up while we're winning. Let me keep dreaming I'm a man.)
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32 comments:
Cabrera does everything Gonzalez does...and betterer. Gonzalez is replaced by Cabrera on the post-season roster...if you think there's gonna be a post-season...
There will be a postseason for the Yankees, ranger, but it will be brief.
Unmercifully brief.
Again.
We are all wide awake and dreaming
Whether it's brief or not, the whole point will be for us to get crushed in the end.
The deeper we go, the bigger the setup, the worse it'll be when the big foot comes down from the sky and squashes us like little pinstriped bugs.
The fix is in.
Bader out of the boot: "One small step for man, one giant leap for Brian Cashman."
Simply brilliant.
All that matters to Hal - and thus to his minion, Cashmoney - is the profit number. The bottom line. The net cash flow.
[have you ever had a job in which the boss had a set of priorities, and you ignored them and went in another direction? For reference, see Kaepernick, Colin]
Call it whatever you like, Hal knows what these numbers are, in which direction they are moving, what they are likely to be. He knows the exact value (TO HIM) of making the playoffs, winning the W.S., etc.
We have no friggin' idea what the numbers are. He does. Calling on him to do something for reasons other than these is just plain irrelevant (to him, and he's the deciderer).
Therefore, the mystifying things that happen so frequently to we fans of the NYYs aren't really all that strange. Hal knows. He puts his priority(ies) where he wants 'em. The rest of us can only guess.
*** note: I honestly believe this. It's why we here all want Cashmoney to be disappeared, and it appears to be a reasonable expectation -- and yet the guy keeps showing up for work every day.
However, this way of looking at the sitch still doesn't explain the Monty-for-a-booted-chump deal.
Bader would replace Hicks. Start in CF moving Judge back to right. Beni in left. Stanton DH.
Oswald would rotate in the IF. Don't know what happens in the playoffs. Maybe moves IKF to the bench.
Still have one too many in the IF if DJ/Gleyber/Rizzo/Donaldson.
I'd go with
DJ 3B
Oswald SS
Gleyber 2B
Rizzo 1B
but Donaldson gets 25M so Brain would want him to start.
13 bit,
Harvard says: "COVID-19 patients typically recover their sense of smell over the course of weeks."
So have patience and take advantage of you inability to smell
Ride the subway a lot.
Take taxis where the driver is at the end of the shift.
Hang out in cheese shops.
Go take pictures at the Fulton Fish Market!
Look at the bright side - eventually we are all going to die.
How many of us want to be buried in a pinstriped coffin, or have our ashes tamped down in a pinstriped urn?
( a show of hands will do)
SEE - now you all understand - at least the ones that didn't already.
And the few of you out there that still are uncertain and confused, searching for meaning in every pitch . . . every swing of the bat . . . every burst bubble 'o' Boone - I say this:
I salute you.
(NOT written in sharpie on moist tiles above a urinal troth at the Oakland Coliseum - May 31, 2011)
@JFOB, Absolutely, agree 100%, HAL knows and is getting he what he wants.
As far as the Bader deal, I do think that the HAL finance theory explains that too. It's risk management. In the off season, they'll be negotiating with Judge. His agent will bring up the fact that Judge is the CF on this team, therefore, he is even more valuable to the Yankees and should be paid commensurately. Cashman will counter with the Bader argument: Bader will be our CF, Judge just needs to play RF. Right or wrong, there it is. In management's heads, they believe that they won't have to pay as much for Judge because they now have Bader.
Then there was the potential that they'd have absolutely no one in the outfield come winter. Because isn't Benintendi a free agent? And Hicks doesn't even count. They've lost confidence in him, and rightly so. They obviously don't believe in Florial. If they are unable to re-sign Judge, they'd have to fill all three outfield positions with free agents!
What would that do to their bargaining position with free agent outfielders? So this Bader acquisition, at the least, is a viable CF candidate (at least on paper), and fills the most difficult outfield position. Now, they're positioned to save money re-signing Judge, and if he leaves, they only need to fill the two corner spots.
That appears to be part of the reason why they're giving Oswaldo Cabrera a shot. They're giving him plenty of time out there in RF. If he works out, then if Judge leaves, they only need to fill LF.
The Bader deal works out beautifully for Cashman from a risk management standpoint. HAL is proud of Brain-less Cashhole. Will give him a good raise this off-season, I'm sure. In their heads, Cashman has already saved HAL at least 50 million bucks. And if Judge goes elsewhere, then HAL saves xxx million bucks.
And Bitty, get better soon. We need you here.
At least for now, you won't have to worry about enduring the stench of the Oakland Coliseum and that dreadful team that plays there.
Mr. bit,
I would add to the sage advice above -- use the restrooms at the Penn Station bus terminal.
Sure to awaken the senses.
Bit:
You could also volunteer at our vet's office in the fecal analysis dept.
They're always processing pet stool samples for Giardia (aka - Intestinal Parasite Panels)
It wouldn't offer the earthy charm of the near Post-Pandemic Penn Station experience (its not just the restrooms anymore) but you'd be providing a service to the pet loving community.
Yes, get better, Bitty. We desperately need you for shared playoff misery!
"Please, don't wake me
No, don't shake me
Leave me where I am
I'm only sleeping..."
Love the Ruth Buzzi line, Duque!
Duque, Mister Bader? Come on, we all know what it should be. Give in to your inner adolescent.
Master Bader.
There. I said it.
Get well, Bit. Our front office stinks, try a visit there.
Hammer, a Yankee fan friend and I often debate why it is that HAL keeps Cashman on. (A good use of time, with the planet burning, Covid lingering on, the war in Ukraine, etc., etc...)
I mean, if he wants to save money, why not just hire some of those baseball wizards running TB or the Cardinals? Let them build a contender from within, as cheaply as possible.
I think the answer is the long game. HAL really doesn't want any of those geniuses building a long-running dynasty, in which player after player blossom into stardom and then makes irresistible demands for major NYC money.
In Tampa, or in Pittsburgh, say, they can keep conning the attendance by talking about rebuilding and what a financial disadvantage they're at, blah-blah-blah. He in New York? That won't pass muster.
HAL probably thinks he dodged a bullet when The Brain's dream team didn't develop. Imagine if The Gleyber were also slamming 40-50 home runs, Sancho playing like a young Johnny Bench, Bird looking like Tino, Sevvy the best starter in the AL? We would all be ecstatic.
HAL would be having conniption fits, as he signed one check after another. He understands that competence is the real enemy, not just today but tomorrow.
Hoss, great Beatle song!
Now this is crazy money: Star rookie Julio Rodriguez and the Seattle Mariners have finalized a massive long-term extension that guarantees the 21-year-old outfielder $210 million and could max out at $470 million, which would be the richest deal in American sports history, sources told ESPN on Friday.
Thanks, Kev! And I can see NOT taking gambles like that—though a lot of the money seems to be based on incentives.
Maybe a bigger per annum, shorter contract—would seem to make more sense.
Rodriguez's deal is just plain silly - the kid hurt himself already during the HR derby and missed about ten days afterwards.
But it will still have an impact the Judge deal.
The Judge deal needs to be close to Cole money - so at 30 years of age (31 at the start of next season) I honestly see it coming in at 8 years at between 36 to 40 per year - plus incentives.
Oh, and hey: last night? Won on a three-run homer. By Judge. Glad the Sabremetricious want to minimize THOSE.
I think our best hope for the playoffs, is: Crusty Rusty Donaldson finally wears through, leaving Oswaldo to play third. And The Gleyber tweaks a gonad.
So, we could go:
DJ, 2B
Beni, LF
Judge, RF
Rizzo, 1B
Mr. Glass, DH
Trevino, C
Oswaldo, 3B
Falafel, SS
Tots, CF
IF we get the Invalid Corps back, we could have:
Cole
Nasty
Sevvy
Domingo
And in the pen:
Montas
Taillon
Schmidt
Flossie
Lasagna
Peralta
Flotsam
Jetsam
SteinbrennerSabremetriciousness abounds
AA - I answered your question in the previous thread.
But now I see that you caught that.
I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!
Off to sniff the subway seats!!!!
@Hoss, re. "the long game" & HAL knows competence is the real enemy.
Absolutely, that is the ultimate answer to why HAL keeps the intern around. A few years ago, I used to think that Cashman was just a stupid buffoon and that HAL was also clueless and liked to keep a family friend around forever as GM. But we know there's more to it. It took me a long time to figure it out but I see it all quite plainly now.
It also explains why the Yankees hire poor coaches. Just look at what guys who leave the Yankees do. Montgomery has turned into Cy Young and even Gallo, the hapless Gallows, has been hitting since joining the Dodgers. They have absolutely ruined Gleyber Torres. They were unable to fix Sanchez. Heck, even Cole became an ordinary pitcher after coming here. They must be looking for mediocrity here. They're just too good at being bad. Nobody is that stupid or sucks that bad. Some of it is definitely intentional. Yankee management doesn't really want to win.
Don’t know if they don’t want to win, Hammer, in my view they just see winning as secondary to their real concern, which is profitability. In the spring, Steinscummer (in a rare burst of clarity) talked about all the “bondholders” he has to answer to. It’s a corporate mentality that we as fans simply can’t relate to. That’s why Cashman-du is coming back - he fits in perfectly in their uptight, puckered asshole, money obsessed world.
One other thing. Not re-signing Judge would be a PR disaster. I’m not saying it’s definitely going to happen, but I think it will. The contract will have to eclipse Cole’s in either per annum or total value. Some of the 2023 cost reduction moves at the deadline anticipate this.
@borntorun999, semantics, semantics. If winning is "secondary", what exactly does that tell you?
Obviously, this is a business, and winning is going to have be part of a fiscally prudent business model. No one is saying the Yankees have to be the biggest spender. We're just saying the Yankees should be the best run franchise in the game. Which it ain't. Not by a zillion zillion miles. They should have the best management, the best scouting, the best coaching staff. They should easily have the best player development in baseball. But they appear pretty mediocre to me. And it appears that that's what they're shooting for.
And absolutely, not re-signing Judge will be a PR disaster. They must have a maximum number in their heads, however. And if some team, be it the Mets or the Dodgers, blows them out of the water, I don't think they'll go bid crazy at the auction.
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