Five Easy Fixes

Well, the June Swoon is here again so it's time for my annual Five Easy Fixes post. 

As much as well all know what the big fix is, fire Hal and Boone, that ain't happening. 

So here are five things that they actually could/should do. 

1) Jazz to Second Base. DJ to the bench. 

Jazz is not a good third baseman and DJ is, sadly, too old to play the field. His lack of range is starting to be a problem. Last night's inability to reach balls put the Yankees in a hole that, given their inability to score runs, put the game out of reach early. 

2) Hire a team optometrist.

I've said this before but, if a player keeps blinking and squinting at the plate, Volpe and Bellinger come to mind, maybe they have issues with their eyes. 

Having someone on staff to dispense Visene or perhaps, write a prescription for glasses or contacts would be helpful. 

3)  Tape up a "Believe" sign in the clubhouse.

It worked on Ted Lasso. OK maybe not that, but how about they all wear lucky jockey shorts, or shave their heads, or get a huge cardboard cut out of Hal and every time they win they remove an article of his clothing... Wait, better to do the opposite. Start with him naked and then ADD clothes every time they win. Yeah, much better incentive.  

The point is... They need some thing. Some bullshit thing that they can all buy into that get's them out of their own heads. 

Normally this gets done by firing the manager but like I said, that ain't happening so it's time to rub the "lucky monkey". 

4) Stop screwing with the players.

The Yankees do this all the time. 

Ben Rice hitting dropped off a cliff when they gave him back his catcher's glove and had him start playing around at third. 

So now he's thinking about how he can stay on the team. 

He's doing extra crouching. He's forced to start thinking like a catcher again. Analyzing the Yankee pitchers, opposition hitters etc.  

Everything but hitting. 

5) Fire Boone! Arrgh.  I promised I wouldn't write this but my G-d it's so fucking obvious!  Uh, OK one more thing that could actually do... Fire Boone ! Damnit. Focus man... Make Paul O'Neill a bench coach.  

Yes! This does two things. 

One, it get's him out of the booth. I hate listening to him with Michael Kay. Most of what they say is the very definition of inane.  

Two, Paulie is angry. Paulie gets angry. No one in the dugout is angry. They are too busy working out handshakes and doing the happy HR dance.  

Look, Aaron Judge is the best baseball player I have ever seen on a regular basis. He also seems to be a very good human being but he's lacking in the anger area. He's a good cop and there is no bad cop. 

If the Yankees aren't going to fire Boone. Then they really need a bad cop. 

Putting O'Neill on the bench is a great way to do it. That way they don't have to trade for an enforcer and they REALLY need an enforcer.