Batting third for the mightiest lineup in baseball... and hitting, gulp, .204?

The Yankee saga of Aaron Hicks began in Nov. 2015, when the Retrieval Empire dealt John Ryan Murphy - the catcher formerly known as "JR" - for the then-failed Twins ex-first-rounder. That season, it looked like a straight-up trade of clap for chlamydia. Hicks hit .217 - about 70 points above Murphy - who was exiled to the Triple A hinterlands.

In the spring of 2017, Hicks emerged from his pumpkin. In the first half of the season, he hit .290, (10 HRs) with an on-base percentage of .398 - all-star stuff! Then he strained a saddlebag and returned to his gourd. In the second half, he hit .217, finishing the year at .266 and 15 HRs, still enough for the Yankees to have "won the trade." 

Last year, though his average continued to fall (.248), Hicks hit 27 HRs, and was commonly hailed on YES as "the second best centerfielder in the AL," which was sort of a joke, because nobody tops Mike Trout. This spring, he signed a deal that extends through 2026, at $10 million per. The writers called it an omen of the new frugal Yankee ownership, signing a core player to a lifetime contract. Days later, Hicks again strained his cabbage-basket and went onto the EL (the Ellsbury List.) He stayed in Ellsbury Hot Tub Land until May 15. 

Since returning, Hicks has been nothing less than mediocre. Last night, he fanned twice and stranded six runners; he has killed more scoring opportunities than plaque psoriasis. Worse, he's done it while batting third. In a lineup brimming with All-Star candidates, he's a Thruway rest stop. Here's what happens: DJ LeMahieu singles, Luke Voit walks - and Hicks hits a grounder into the over-shift. It's been this way for a month. When the Yankees obtained Edwin Encarnacion, we figured Hicks would drop in the order. Nope. When Giancarlo Stanton returned, we figured Hicks would drop. Nope. Next week, Aaron Judge returns. Well, WTF?

Listen: This isn't a rip on Hicks. He's a gazelle in CF. And one of these days, he'll heat up. But batting third? Seriously. In a good year, Hicks shouldn't bat third in this lineup. The more he struggles, the more rallies he strangles, the more we should start to worry about his long-term value.

And then there is the saga of Mr. Cameron Maybin.

Lately, the debate over what to do with Hammerin' Cameron has neglected one possible option: CF. In fact, once Judge returns, Maybin's ticket to the waiver wire is as good as punched. There simply is no path for playing time, unless somebody gets hurt. But, but BUT... if Hicks is still fanning once every four at bats, and if his average dips below the Mendoza Line, shouldn't the Yankees consider maybe Maybin in center?

Oh, why am I bothering! Of course, this won't happen! We have an eight-year contract with Hicks; plus, his trade remains a signature victory for Zoilo Cashman's GM record. The Yankees "won the trade." (Murphy, for whatever it's worth, is now a Diamondback, hitting .177 with 4 HRs.) So it's Hicks... for now. But what if a month from now, he's still clogging the arteries... or tweaking his tummy-tuck? Wouldn't it make sense to keep Maybin... just in case?

One other weirdness: According to Scranton manager Jay Bell, the newly declawed Clint Frazier will play CF for the Riders of the Rail. Supposedly, Frazier is more comfortable in CF, though this is sort of like saying Lyme Disease is more enjoyable than Ebola. Could the Yankees actually be prepping Frazier for center, if Hicks continues to flounder? The answer, we all know, is NO. Frazier is now officially an afterthought, a player in pre-trade Purgatory. He might as well play shortstop. 

One final point: Last night, some intrepid Gammonites ripped Frazier for not reporting to Scranton immediately after his cruel demotion. What disgrace! What blaspheme! The horror, Mr. Kurtz! They compared him to Tyler Wade - who took an Uber to reach a Triple A game, and Mike Tauchman, who practically emailed himself to the Electric City. Well, both Wade and Tauchman flubbed their trials in Gotham, while Frazier had been the Yankees best hitter. If he needs to get his head right, he has 72 hours to do so. Thus, there is no outrage, no collusion, no obstruction, WITCH HUNT! In fact, the stories stick of media hissy-fit, considering Frazier's strained past relations with the scribe tribe. If he doesn't show within the required 72 hours, write your stories, asswipes. But this guy is playing baseball - he's not being vetted for the Supreme Court - and he just got screwed by a team for which he dreamed of playing. Gimme a break. And for everybody's sake, bat Hicks eighth or ninth, until his bat catches up with the league. This shouldn't be so hard.