Welcome to Detroit

Did you know that we live in Detroit?  Or maybe Liverpool?

Or Spain, or Paris, or Argentina, or Brazil, or Boston, or Canada?

Apparently, it's true.

I opened my New York Times sports section today, looking forward to seeing all those BoSox fans across from the bus terminal pay their grudging respect to how the Yankees' indomitable Second Line beat their heroes again.

Instead, I found myself in the newspaper edition of the Wide World of Sports.

There were articles on almost everything BUT the one NYC team to perform with any consistent competence for the last 40 years—the team that outdraws all the others, the team whose Tiffany logo today sits blazoned across the cap of every other person you see on the street.

A big, front cover piece on how the NHL isn't doing nearly as good a job as the NFL in trying to prevent concussions.  An article on the French Open's Round of 32.  Half a page on how former Warriors still feel connected to their old team (I'm not making this up.)

On and on I turned the pages, thinking It was a night game, but it wasn't on the Coast! 

I did a little something on how the Times ran, what, about 300 more soccer articles as Yankees articles last year?

Today there is another half-page about a guy who blew the whistle on an Argentine soccer scandal, a big column and photo on Liverpool winning the Champions' League, something about Neymar being accused of rape, and another story on how a minor Spanish soccer star, long past his prime, died in a car accident.

There was also another column about how a former Houston Texans receiver was accused of sexual assault, but then cleared.

Yep, all the rape and all the concussion stories that are fit to print.  The Times didn't even run its usual, incredibly boring Sunday baseball wrap-up, just a column by Billywitz about fans getting hit by batted balls.

Probably the worst, though, was an entire page devoted to a Detroit writer, pushing his new book, about how "When Detroit Was on Top of the World: Boston is on the verge of another title, but in the 1930s the Motor City Ruled."

It seems that if the Bruins win the Stanley Cup, Boston will have the reigning champions in 3 sports for the first time any one city has, since Detroit in 1935-36.

(Actually, Detroit did NOT rule in the 1930s.  In that pre-NBA decade, the Motor City saw 6 World Series or league titles, and 4 championships.  The Yankees alone took 5 rings in the decade, and overall it was 16 finals and 9 championships for the local boys.)

But that would mean saying something nice about New York.  And as always, The NEW YORK Times has as usual nothing to do with NEW YORK—certainly not New York sports.  For all the soccer, there was no article about the two local soccer teams, who notched a win and (of course) a tie between them yesterday.

And baseball?  Baseball?  Fuhgeddaboutit!

Aside from the exciting Billywitz piece on fans getting hit—conclusion:  There should be more protective netting.  Genius!—the only thing on baseball was a wire service article on the Yankees win.

One smaller than the piece on the Bruins win.  Much smaller than the LPGA tournament down in Charleston.  ("Former Duke Teammates Tied For Lead at U.S. Women's Open."  Wow—who could resist a headline like that??  I mean, if you were a professional women's golfer who went to Duke.)

Incredible.  The New York Times has now decided to use a wire service to cover Yankees home games against the Boston Red Sox.

And not even a real wire service, such as the AP.  Instead, it was by something called "Field Level Media."  And an action photo from Shutterstock, of Gary Sanchez completing his back swing on that home run.

Hooray.

But I see an opportunity here.  Why don't we form our own wire service, and try to underbid "Field Level Media"?

We can call ourselves Sterling Wire to Wire, in honor of our idol, or maybe Duke Alphonso Sports Reporting.

The Times will probably think we're from Europe, and therefore worth paying attention to.