That's right! A mere 253 years ago today, a cheeky little Corsican scamp by the name of Napoleon Bonaparte (originally, Napoleone Buonoparte) entered the world.
He had such big dreams and such ambitions that he would not stop until he had managed to leave much of Europe a smoking ruin, and had killed off a generation of Frenchman.
Hmm, remind you of some other short megalomaniac running something into the ground?
I kid, I kid! Brian Cashman is no Napoleon. Napoleon did some good stuff, too. A military genius and master strategist, the Napster was called by one historian, "the most competent human being who ever lived."
Does that sound like our Brian? No, it does not.
Speaking of The Brain, he got his own cockade handed to him last night, on ESPN's weird, alternative programming, the "Kayrod Show." Hosted by Michael Kay and Alex Rodriguez, with Derek Jeter as extremely uncomfortable guest.
A-Rod went into his usual, cringing and cringeworthy apology for having been such an asshole half his life, telling Jeets again how sorry he was. When Kay asked Jeter if he felt angry at the one sportswriter who voted against his selection to the Hall of Fame, Jeter, predictably, said no, but made the excellent point that HOF voters ought to stand up and explain their votes. Alex then chimed in by asking if he should be angry at the 83 percent of voters who denied him a place in Cooperstown.
Uh-boy.
But I digress.
The highlight of the show was Alex going all Dark Brandon A-Rod, taking apart Cashman's recent moves with the aid of an entire chart. While Kay fumfahed and tried to defend the man who signs his paychecks, Rodriguez tore the Napoleon of the Bronx into still smaller and smaller pieces.
What was this all about? Some weird A-Rod bid for a Yankees front office job?
Yet another self-reinvention of the Lost Boy from Washington Heights?
I dunno. But I sure preferred it to all the extended groveling to Jeets.
(Note to A-Rod: He's just not that into you. And hey, if we all went around apologizing for every stupid thing we did when young, we'd have absolutely no time to do more stupid things now that we're old!)
As previously stated, I think the man for the job of replacing our own, pint-sized dictator should be Derek Sanderson Jeter. But if he's not interested—Jeets was coy about ever coming back to baseball, saying he has three little girls to look after now—then, yeah...
After what promises to be an epic shitshow of a season, why not Dark Brandon A-Rod? A man who has already proven that he is willing to do anything, cheat in any possible way, tell any kind of falsehood, to be a winner?
That sounds like my kind of general manager!
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100 comments:
Here's how you know that Arod is campaigning for the GM job: he put Cashman through the wringer, but he fawned over Hal, giving him an A-plus for the business side of the operation.
I wouldn't mind having A-Rod take over as GM. For crying out loud, can anyone do worse than Cashman? I'm so sick of that evil weasel.
I think Evil Weasel is a GREAT nickname for him, Hammer. I am also claiming it for my next garage band.
It's not only Napoleon's Birthday but my twins turn 32 today!
Have no fear....When my crypto explodes, my son and I will purchase the Yankees from Hal. I'll hold job interviews here first. I will keep everyone notified.
By the way, Hal might be a cheap scumbag and perhaps a crook, but the current Mets owner, Steve Cohen is a known fraudster:
In 2013, S.A.C. Capital Advisors "pleaded guilty to insider trading charges in 2013 and paid $1.8 billion in penalties" and was required to stop handling investments for outsiders. Cohen "escaped criminal indictment himself despite being the living, breathing heart of S.A.C. Capital,"
Also in 2013,".... the lawsuit comes amid mounting pressure on Steven Cohen over an insider trading investigation that led to the arrest of Michael Steinberg, one of Cohen's closest confidantes at SAC Capital. SAC affiliates reached two civil insider trading settlements totaling nearly $616 million with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. SAC neither admitted nor denied wrongdoing in either case."
It's not only Napoleon's and Carl's twins Birthday today but also my neighbor Billy!
Let's celebrate in style with another Cole WIN/LOSS!!!
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Hammer
Big no to A-Rod. Do you really want to read about him EVERY SINGLE DAY! A-rod thinks this. A-Rod says that. A-Rod is dating player X's ex wife.
He's a classless me firster.
Yep, Cohen is a bad guy. Who wants to win.
Great first inning. Love that Donaldson.
Judge should have bunted. If he had, the Yankees would be up 1-0 now.
So IKF makes an error and Cole falls apart?
A-rod dropping off the face of the earth would be mourned by few.
Evil Weasel...I'm savoring that one...
!00% behind what Doug and Rufus said about ARoD.
This is a man that has people on his payroll to capture his own farts so that he can snuffle them in later for his own enjoyment.
No thank you please to him having anything to do with Yankees upper management.
What the -
GET HICKS OFF MY FUCKING TEAM!!!
Time to DFA Hicks.
I'm beginning to think that's what he wants, with the guaranteed contract.
Suzyn: "Rookie mistake"
yeah seriously. Hicks can't keep his head in the game.
Had Hicks only had the time and the room to turn one more time I'm sure he would have had it
Hicks looked like a Little League right fielder on that drive -- the kid you put out there and pray the other team doesn't hit the ball to him. Totally lost.
I think Hicks sees the writing on the wall now that the Yankees got Bader. He's thinking about the off season, joining the PGA Tour, maybe the Saudis.
Miggy AYG-HAB 7.8
Hicks
The Yankees first base coach looked sick as he took the helmet and gloves from HICKs
Hopefully the Bader Boot is used to kick Hicks off the team
I cannot root against them, but goddamnit I cannot root for them. I hate this team.
Way past time. But he's owed 10 million for the next 3 years. So he will be a permanent fixture in the outfield.
Even Judge sucking now. And Rizzo.
Going into tonight's action, Ryan Yarbrough was 0-7, with a 5.08 ERA. His "strategy" seems to be to fall behind in the count, then come in with a 70-80 mph pitch down the pike. Which the Yankees can't hit.
The most boring team ever.
14 straight scoreless innings? 9 shutouts already?
I'm old enough that I can remember the 1968 Yankees, the team that still holds the modern record for the lowest team batting average, at .214. And I don't remember THAT team having so little chance of scoring.
Enough. I'm done for the night. The Mets are in a rain delay, but that looks more entertaining.
Carl,
Hicks needs to go the Ellsbury home for baseball activities.
Two shutdowns in a row?
I’m all for ARod as GM. 100% behind it. I don’t know of any other person who make a difference. Things have been lifeless without George.
Jeter would be a better GM than a-rod.
Weird Al would be a better GM than the intern. And more entertaining.
Hoss,
Thanks for making me even more depressed.
Jeter won’t do it. Might as well ask the Pope to do it (Francis not Mike)
Beau,
What about Dom DeLuise?
Wait, he's dead. Still would be better than the intern.
Even Lee Trevino is sucking. Swinging at a pitch a foot outside.
Should have bunted.
Hicks is a fan favorite!
Everyone is standing and (Bronx) cheering for him!
You’re mixing Dom up with Paul Prudhomme. I mean, I always do.
How about we get a magic 8 ball, and change the icosahedron to George Steinbrenner phases. With every question, always a wise decision. I’d go for an Ouiji but I think the girls all cheat.
But no, really, Arod is it.
Judge should have bunted.
Is it a historic collapse if the other teams in the division keep losing?
Baltimore 7 Toronto 3 in the 8th.
If The Rays win they are tied with Toronto at 10 back.
Everybody loses, we win. Kinda.
But my God, this blows.
The most fearsome offense in the majors, ladies and germs.
No Carp, no Stanton, no nothing.
this is where the rays get a run or two to put the game out of reach
annnnd there it is.
Fucking Peralta. Where's Maraschino fer chrissakes?
This is smelling a lot like September 2000. Only I don’t sense this team has a turnaround in them.
Everyone bailing out of the Stadium has one benefit: no one is doing the wave any more.
The Yankees crack (head) coaching staff has ruined AnDUjar's swing.
That was as enjoyable as waiting in line at the DMV.
But that Trivino has some spin rate, don't he?
Love it, JM! Came back to see that last inning. Wish I had not—though the sheer horror of it was kinda entertaining.
First, Hicks cannot start anymore. No matter what, Florial has to start in center until he plays himself out of the position. Then Locastro.
No more Hicks, period.
Hoss, I couldn’t believe those assholes doing the wave, they wanna do something? Give Steinsucker an empty stadium to suck on.
See, this where you you need, I mean REALLY need, a good manager. Boone is nothing but a corporatist shill, he cannot inspire, nor is he a leader of men.
Ownership doesn’t care. Management doesn’t care. The players don’t care. Why should we? Why the fuck should we?
Rufus, didn't Miggy have shoulder surgery a few years ago? Nobody is better afterwards, see Greg Bird. I had it three years ago, and now I can't break thirty..... Hell I can't break... never mind.
Hoss, if Hicks loses his job, 'whatever'.
Sadly, Miggy may be done. But...a hit in every game. I think we can let him play a little more to see if he gets it back...and right now, thanks to Cashman's incompetence, we have no choice!
Judge needs to slam some of these clowns into a locker. If I were BOONE, I would have a mouthful of cracked teeth I'd be so PISSED right now.
Boone's comment on the game: "...we're good, we're gonna get a little more whole moving forward."
No, you're not good.
No, you're not necessarily going to "get a little more whole moving forward," as your every big injury is now supposed to return some time between "a few weeks" and 2023.
Of course he can't push the panic button. But it's as you say, 999: this is where you need a really dynamic manager to keep the team concentrating.
As the bottom of the ninth began, Sterling observed, "The Yankees gave up three runs in the top of the ninth that they should never have given up." Never given up under what condition?
A different bullpen?
A different defense?
A different manager?
A different general manager?
A different owner?
A trip on the Wayback Machine that would have allowed someone to abort the births of Boone, Cashman, Hal Steinbrenner, and Aaron Hicks?
As usual, master-class baseball analysis from The Master.
And then, insisting, "We're gonna recover!" and agreeing with the questioner that, yes, it's hard missing D.J. and Stanton—"those are two great offensive players for us."
No, they're not going to recover. And no, those are not "great offensive players."
Look, I love D.J. LeMahieu. A few years back, in the Covid year, he was almost the MVP. But his going down is like losing Cesar Tovar. He's a nice player who does a lot of things well and can play anywhere, and when he went down he was hitting .279 with 12 homers and 43 ribbies. That's it.
Stanton is injured? Stanton is always injured. He was hitting .228 when he went out, and had not hit well for two months. How anyone could possibly expect him to do better or last longer defies common sense.
There's no "recovery" coming. There's just some of the aging, much-injured players maybe making it back before the playoffs. When who knows if they'll be in any shape to play.
. . . And speaking of Aaron Hicks--we all know the what the problems are there: Cashman's ego and the absurd long-term largesse he bestowed on this sub-mediocrity. If Hal could miraculously grow a pair, he would just eat the rest of the contract and DFA Hicks. And fire Cashman. And then fire Boone. And then sell the team to someone with even a rudimentary knowledge of and interest in baseball. Simple enough, right?
But who will fire them?
The Boss from Christmas past?
Come on now.
What we need at this point is a true RECKONING.
And El Duque - tomorrow's launch piece needs to provide some hugs and reassurances to the folks here that need to be walked back from the ledge of no return.
Seriously EL DUQUE - the time has come for you to embrace those here that need it.
BREATH people.
Its not going to be OK - BUT YOU WILL.
(ok maybe not - but I'm trying to help)
AA -- That was my point, which was why I inserted the adverb "miraculously" before rolling out my to-do list of salvation.
What this list needs now is not any counseling from el duque but an emergency intervention from Dr. Phil. Anyone have his cell phone number?
Boone sounds like Hitler in the spring of '45. Eagerly waiting for the new secret weapons to roll off the assembly lines, ordering Generals not to retreat, waiting for "paper divisions" into the breach. I'm not a believer in panicking and making stupid trades, or throwing untested rookies to kick start a team. But if not now, when? Time to mix it up on the left side of the infield, and let Florial play his way off the roster.
I have his number - but frankly he would have no interest in offering any assistance unless there was a substantial cost benefit involved.
I'm happy to have your support Barney - you know I try.
But when you're ONLY above average - sometimes its just not good enough :(
Gotta disagree with you, AA. Like Juice Newton, I'm old enough to face the dawn. I don't need a hug, I need some show of life!
I agree, Kevin: Florial has got to come up tomorrow, and has got to start in CF. Not because he has such amazing potential—he doesn't—but because Hicks simply cannot play anymore.
This team has been getting older and older in recent years, and now it has hit the limit. Carp, 36; Rizzo, 33; Donaldson 36; DJ 34; Stanton, 33 in November; Hicks, 33 in October.
In his usual manner of wishful thinking, Coops just assumed these guys would stay the same or even get better as they aged. Nope. They got worse, as non-juicing ballplayers will, and they get hurt. A lot.
In light of that, The Brain might have tried to get younger at the trade deadline—maybe even grab up young Soto. But he didn't. Now...there's really nothing much else to do.
PLEASE don't misunderstand me HC66.
I'm requesting that the HUGS go out to those who need them.
Emotional support is quite important in times like these.
Those who don't need it - are often recruited to provide it for those that do.
I'm only trying to provide assistance.
How does anyone know whether Florial has potential if he is never given a meaningful sample-size of PA at the major-league level?
Here is Florial's slash line at Scranton:
.284 .365 .487 .852
It's simply perverse to state emphatically that a player with his athleticism, speed, and overall ability and performance has no potential. AAA numbers are NOT meaningless--they require an adjustment, to be sure, but they are not meaningless. It is inconceivable that he would not be outperforming Hicks by a good margin on both sides of the ball if he were given a shot now.
It's Cashman's ego at work again. The only way for Cash to vindicate his idiotic policy of keeping Florial buried is to continue to bury him.If he comes up and succeeds, Cashman's ineptitude is exposed. He cannot allow that, even if it means torpedoing the season by keeping Hicks in the lineup.
I should add . . . Cashman's ineptitude AND racism.
Sorry, AA—I just couldn't resist a Juice Newton reference.
And as for tomorrow morning, well, maybe the sun's light will be dim. And it won't matter anyhow, if morning's echo says we've sinned (I hate judgmental echoes.). Well, it was what I wanted now (I do have trouble with tenses.). And if we're victims of the night, I won't be blinded by the light.
Just call me angel of the morning, angel! Just touch my cheek before you leave me, baby!...
Ahem. Sorry. Getting punchy. Too much Yankees baseball.
Oh God. Now we're down to quoting shlock rock.
It's all good, HC.
Everything but . . .
The Yankees.
And - Great comments, Barney.
For a giant purple dinosaur -- you ain't no TeleTubby.
Amazing Barney. First you went through a thread without attacking anyone. You then went to your Florial numbers, which would be a nice argument, if he was 23-24. But players who repeat levels, like he did, and is old meat at AAA putting up those numbers rarely ever become. MLB starters. I didn't say NEVER, but at this point he might be a nice fourth outfielder, which has value, but... The Brain should have brought him up when players started to go down, but I'm not involved in their reasoning which are three steps above any of us. But I could have left your ideas stand but for one reason. When ideas/actions don't line up with yours you can't help but calling someone a racist (or some other millennial verbal word bomb). What makes you think that the Brain is a racist? Do have a quote, heard an accusation from some professor at Brown, just WHAT EXACTLY? Calling someone a racist is just, if not moreso as calling someone a racial slur. It's an vicious attack on someone's character, and is a slur which, for the time being, is allowed to get tossed around without consequence. So please do enlighten me, I'm really sick of that smarmy, condescending son of a bitch.
HC, where in the hell did Juice Newton come from? Next thing you'll be quoting lines from "Twenty-sixth Century Schizoid Man". 😵
Kevin, I just thought of it when AA was very kindly asking Duque to console us all in the morning: "I'm old enough to face the dawn..."
And from there, well, it was all over.
Actually, the song was written by someone named Chip Taylor, in 1967 (hence all the agonizing over spending the night together). And I never realized before how much of it is weird. (The echoes will judge them? Okay.) Still, a fun song!
Have to turn to something in these late nights, after another Yankees abomination.
Right now I'm listening to:
"I remember
The 35 sweet goodbyes
When you put me on the Wolverine up to Anandale..."
ON KEVIN'S PERSONAL ATTACK
Kevin wrote, "you went through a thread without attacking anyone. You then went to your Florial numbers, which would be a nice argument." He's correct--as usual, I attacked no one personally, and, as usual, he initiated a personal attack against me. This is an old story by now that I have documented repeatedly. You could look it up.
ON KEVIN'S FABRICATED BASEBALL ANALYSIS
Kevin wrote, "players who repeat levels, like he did, and is old meat at AAA putting up those numbers rarely ever become. MLB starters. I didn't say NEVER, but at this point he might be a nice fourth outfielder, which has value, but..." This is pure fantasy and fabrication. Kevin often pulls these postulates out of his ass, and never offers any statistical, empirical, or analytical support for these asinine assertions. Just for the record--another dollop of BS from the bottomless pit of Kevin's diseased mind.
YANKEE RACISM
As I've stated before, and as others on the blog have agreed, I sense a tacit racism in the makeup of the major league roster. There are obviously no instances of Cashman being photographed at Proud Boys rallies or wearing Klan robes, you imbecile, but it's obvious that Cashman prefers to acquire and promote either white or light-skinned players of color for the starting eight. People of color make up 38 percent of MLB rosters; black players make up 7.2 percent of MLB rosters; (https://www.newsweek.com/mlb-has-lowest-percentage-black-baseball-players-3-decades-report-1708382#:~:text=Focusing%20specifically%20on%20racial%20hiring,percent%20of%20the%20U.S.%20population.). The Yankees seem to have a greater tolerance for dark-skinned pitchers than everyday players: people of color make up 30.7 percent of the 26-man roster, but there is only one dark-skinned black among the everyday players--Andujar--which is .07 percent of the everyday players; counting Hicks, who is lighter-skinned, and Judge, who is biracial, the total among everyday players is 23 percent. So the Yankees are far below the MLB averages for people of color and blacks. This kind of bullshit has been going on since forever on this team. Make of it what you will, but it is bound to seem obvious to anyone but apologists for racism like Kevin that there's something suspicious about the Yankees' constantly preferring older or washed-up whites like Rizzo, Gallo, and Donaldson (or light-skinned blacks like Hicks or biracial players like Judge) to clearly more-talented and younger dark-skinned blacks like Andujar and Florial--that it is part of a pattern of tacit racism among Yankee management.
Has anyone noticed that Kevin, alone among all the commenters here, wafts aura of characters like Travis Bickle (from fiction) or John Hinckley Jr. or Arthur Bremer (from real life)?
Relax everyone, only three more years on Hick's contract and then we can buy him out for a Coll mikkion.
Too bad Judge will be gone by then.
But at least we will still have "Big Mike" Stanton
" Barney said...
Oh God. Now we're down to quoting shlock rock.
August 16, 2022 at 12:59 AM"
" Barney said...
AA -- That was my point, which was why I inserted the adverb "miraculously" before rolling out my to-do list of salvation.
August 15, 2022 at 11:27 PM"
Blarney,
Thanks again for never, ever initiating attacks here. It wasn't you who first called another poster imbecile or said he pulled it out his ass.
You're right we don't deserve your super-smart prophesies or you gifts of salvation. Because you're too good for us. Such a great mind and never being an delusional asshole is really too good for this blog. You are really the great and powerful Oz.
Trivia Time (‘cause I’m bored): Chip Taylor who wrote “Angel Of The Morning”, is the brother of actor Jon Voight.
Baseball connection: His most famous song, “Wild Thing”, was the walk on theme for Ricky Vaughn in the movie “Major League”
I'd have never guessed those two songs were written by the same person, let alone Jon Voight's brother (coming full circle to the Daily News back page).
Which got me thinking (dangerous this early in the morning) Joe Buck (the douche bag announcer) was born in 1969. Joe Buck, the midnight cowboy, was released in 1969.
I already liked Jack Buck, but if the name reference was intentional, that goes to another whole level.
You're right we don't deserve your super-smart prophesies or you gifts of salvation. Because you're too good for us. Such a great mind and never being an delusional asshole is really too good for this blog. You are really the great and powerful Oz.
"Judge is biracial" writes Barney. He may well be, but he has never said so. Why is this racial bullshit of yours suddenly come out? Oh yes, the Millennial super power which quails anyone who disagrees. Baby, your powers don't work on me.
Insofar as my assertion that age and performance in the minor leagues is concerned, Barney shows that her knowledge of baseball is still very thin. Before spewing your crazy ideas and spewing names at me, do some research. And your thinly veiled issues with color and performance is straight out of Nazi propaganda. You should change your name to Fraulein Goebbels.
And your response to calling Cashman a racist by throwing some half-assed statistics out there doesn't cut it. To use your words, "that I SENSED THAT BARNEY is a......" (whatever you find most offensive) the answer you gave would cut it, not by half. I've wasted too much time on you, Fraulein Goebbels.
Horace, oh no Guadalajara won't do, and I'm never going back to my old school
Personally, I think the Steely Dan song for the Yankees should be "you go back, Ca$h, and do it again..."
And badly.
Hey Travis Bickle Kevin--I supported my contention about racism with hard numbers and a verifiable citation--you strut made-up notions about how players succeed at AAA with no statistical or analytical support of any kind--your usual modus operandi, just improvised, unsupported bullshit and endless flaming. That's because you're a pathetic fraud who reads nothing, knows nothing, and has no purpose on this blog except to sniff my ass all day--you and your fellow psychotic tag-team partner Dufus. Enjoy!
I'm way past college, I'm on here for fun. It's not a job. And if you think that anyone reads your,ahhh sources LMFAO! BTW, call me "Anton".
Anton,
Love your inciteful commentary.
PS, Yankees suck right now.
10-4 on that good buddy, lol!
Weird, BARNEY still can't explain why Cashman is a racist. But then again, when you are mad at the world....
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