1. Why is there no one, great, iconic song about Sacramento? (See right.) The town is Lodi on steroids, Ventura Highway on last call. Didn't Warren or Joni ever get drunk there? Thinking white bread, glistening Newsome hair, Stepford crowds... If so, Yank fans could dominate tonight. This is why the Yankee brand name must be preserved. Sacramento, my memento, heaven sent-o, you big Pimento...
2. JC Escara is supposedly trying to switch-hit. I say, you go, guy! He's hitting .200. Can he do worse?
3. Yank fans haven't fully appreciated Boston's rancid first two months. I know, I know... it's too soon to crow. But we play them seven times in June. We can scuttle them. Last winter, no fans in baseball had higher hopes. It's delicious now, watching them slink from bush to bush, avoiding eye-contact, as the totality of their failure emerges. They are Ebola. Seven games. If we win five, Boston's done.
4. The Athletic - the Gray Lady's sports page - lists bullpen and RH catcher as our trade deadline needs. (Christian Vazquez, finishing his journey?) But the failure of Ryan McMahon leaves 3B open. (Question: could - gulp - Rafael Devers still play 3B?)
5. For now, the Yankee farms offer no solution. George Lombard Jr. won't take over SS. Carlos Legrange walks too many. We have two outfielders - The Martian and Spencer Jones - and Anthony Volpe. That means trades. That means we are in Cooperstown Cashman's hands, and - I swear it - if he blows it again, if he botches another July 31, we must hit the streets in a violent insurrection and burn the Stadium to the ground. August 1, our new Independence Day!
6. Speaking of Cooperstown, let's hold up. Really now... who here expected Gerrit Cole to be lights-out? We may be witnessing a Hall of Fame-level career elevation. If Cole continues, the Yankees could have baseball's best rotation. This could change everything in the AL East. This is not Colter Bean coming up from Scranton and throwing a few scoreless innings. This is a great pitcher who might have just been granted a second lease on life. This is fucking huge.
7. Here's something that's not fucking huge: Giancarlo is said to be swinging a bat. Whoopie. Will he do better than Paul Goldschmidt? (.863 OPS.) The Yankees need to look at output, not exit velocity. Stanton should stay out until he can all-out sprint to second on a line drive off the wall. Until then, he's a GIDP waiting to happen.
8. Somehow, the Yankees must add a closer. Let's face it: Bednar won't last. One far-flung possibility: Rafael Montero, a 35-year-old former Met/Astro/Ranger, now a Scranton Railrider. He missed spring training because of a VISA issue. (ICE OUT OF TAMPA. NOW!) He's thrown 10 innings at Triple A, been knocked around - 5.91 ERA.) But in 2023, for Houston, guy was a killer. Gotta believe that, if he shows anything, he gets a call.
9. Jazz Chisholm (.724 OPS) must start hitting lefties. If not, he will be platooned. He will not like it - not one bit - and he will not hide the fact that he does not like it, not one bit. At that point, all the talk about how masterful Boone has been - keeping Volpe and Jose Caballero in harmony - will fly out the window. If Chisholm starts hitting, all will be fine. If he doesn't, a time bomb starts ticking.
10. Here's how the Yankees win it in 2026: Judge and Rice remain the best 1-2 punch in baseball, while Cole and Schlittler become the best 1-2 punch in pitching. Also, we add a closer. In the musical name of Sacramentos - eat my Mentos! - sing loud, people! Let them hear you in Bakersfield!
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5 comments:
First, there is this: https://www.playlistresearch.com/themes/places/city-sac.htm
Second, as I use my hand to the eyebrows as a visor and gaze west - west towards the National League - I think of the immortal words for the immortal asshole, Alan Greenspan, "Irrational Exuberance," and I shiver and quake. Okay, say we get the spare parts together and assemble them into a cohesive whole - say we find a lights-out closer - not sure how, but say we do - then we have to stay injury free, the bottom of the order, the boys in steerage, as it were, they need to hit. Then, we need to avoid the minefield of dumb field moves that Boone is capable of inflicting on us. Then we need to dodge the bullet of Brian's "Trade Deadline Decisions at Dawn©". Then we need to stay healthy. Then we need to hope that the Dodgers get lost in the Bermuda Triangle, a place, by the way, that nobody talks about anymore. Then we need to keep hitting and pitching. Then we need to not fuck it up in the clutch. It's a steep and rocky path to glory. We are still in the foothills, stumbling along and hoping to catch some team chemistry in a bottle.
OH, Hello everyone!
How’s it going over there?
I’m 83 miles away, you know
From seeing the Yankees in Sacramento
But I can’t go today
Too busy tomorrow
And Sunday we have
Other plans
But if we were
Still in the days of Mo’
I’d go go go
To Sacramento
But Cash’s team
In 26
Ain’t worth
What they’re charging
For those Tix
😎
Not sure where the new closer is supposed to materialize from. Perhaps there will be greater availability at the trade deadline.
BTR, I hear Kyra Sedgwick is available. She can bring along Jon Tunney if he can hit and play third.
I nominate this for the new Sacramento city song. All we need is music and they'll be dancing in the streets.
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