For New York sports teams, to rule the tabloids' back pages is the traditional Holy Grail of free publicity, the essence of spiritual and economic power.
And the winner was never in doubt: The Yankees ruled Gotham. Easily.
Well, today, that may change. The Matrix is fluctuating, and the cultural magnetic poles appear ready to shift.
The Yankees enter today's Subway Series doubleheader with the slimmest June margin - 10.5 pages - since our count began. Moreover, they have been unable to shake the Mets despite holding first for the last month. (Last night, the Rays took the lead in the AL East.)
Though the Yankees have outdrawn the Mets at home - (they rank third in home attendance behind the Dodgers and Cardinals) - something weird is happening on the road.
Historically, the Yankees are one of the biggest away-game draws. (Last year, they finished 2nd behind the Dodgers.) But look, look, look...
Today, they rank eleventh - 11th! - in road attendance... behind, gulp, the Mets. Good grief, the Cincinnati Reds are drawing more on the road. (In fact, the top 10 are NL teams. Can anybody tell me why?) The Yankees are playing in front of more empty seats than the San Diego Padres. W.T.F.?
One guess: Fans are tired. The over-shifts have robbed sluggers of their lure, and big-hitting teams simply strike out or hit homers. Meanwhile, the NYC tabs - like Yank fans everywhere - have come to recognize the disinterest of our billionaire ownership, which is more concerned with making money than winning. (The difference between Hal Steinbrenner and his father can only be measured in light years.) This week, the Yankees were outbid by Atlanta for a starting pitcher that we desperately needed. The stated reason? We didn't want next year's draft pick to drop 10 slots. Ten slots? Oh, sure... money had nothing to do with it, eh?
The second half of 2019 is here. With a sweep today, the Yankees could regain first in the AL East, and perhaps restore order to the Matrix. If they get swept, you might want to put an asterisk on this date.
Today could be the day that New York City turned.
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60 comments:
Could it be that fans aren't coming out on the road to see a starless visiting team? Without Judge and (the slugger you love to hate) Giancarlo (and, to a lesser extent, RoY runner up Andujar), this team lacks the HR and big hit theatrics that draw in opposing fans.
ALTHOUGH I DESPISE THE METS (AND SOME OF THEIR FANS), I WILL SAY THIS...
THEY HAVE ALMOST A "MYSTICAL" FAN BASE.
WHEN I WATCH MET GAMES ON THE ROAD, I OFTEN HEAR FANS CHANTING, "LETS GO METS! LETS GO METS!"....AND I CAN'T REALLY UNDERSTAND IT.
IT SURPRISES ME THAT I HEAR IT IN MORE THAN A FEW CITIES.
I KNOW IT'S A FREE COUNTRY AND PEOPLE CAN ROOT FOR WHOEVER THEY CHOOSE, BUT I COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND WHY A YOUNG PERSON, GROWING UP IN NEW YORK, WOULD CHOOSE THE METS OVER THE YANKEES.
WITH ALL THE INCREDIBLE HISTORY, THE HEROES, THE STORIES, AND THE GLORY'S, WHY WOULD YOU CHOOSE CLEON JONES NUDE IN A VAN, OVER BABE RUTH AND LOU GEHRIG? IT JUST NEVER MADE ANY SENSE TO ME.
TO EACH HIS OWN, I GUESS....
LETS KICK THEIR ASSES TODAY....TWICE PLEASE.
Yeah, why choose Cleon nude in a van over The Babe in bed with three women, a hamhock, and a pitcher of beer, as Ty Cobb claimed to discover him in a brothel? Or being chased down the aisle of a train with a knife-wielding woman behind him, much to the delight of his teammates?
When it comes to moral depravity, nobody, but NOBODY outdoes our Yankees!
WHY WOULD YOU CHOOSE CLEON JONES NUDE IN A VAN, OVER BABE RUTH AND LOU GEHRIG?
When I was 15, I recall being allowed by my parents -- for the first time -- to travel by bus with four teenage male friends from New Jersey to NYC to see a Mets game. We got off in the Port Authority bus terminal, somehow managed to find the #7 train, and went out to Shea. By dumb luck, it was the first home Mets game immediately following the "nude in a van" incident (i.e., where Cleon was caught sleeping naked in a van with a white woman ... who was not his wife).
There was an elderly man sitting near us, all alone, scoring the game. When the stadium announcer was going through the starting line-ups, the man was listening attentively, filling out his scorecard.
When the announcer said, "Starting in left field for the Mets, Cleon Jones", the place went crazy with a mixture of cheering and laughter. The man looked around and then said out loud to no one in particular, "Hey Cleon! How's the wife?"
I can assure you that the elderly man made four 15-year-old boys laugh out loud that day.
P.S. FWIW, there's a blog devoted to Cleon Jones: https://cleonjones.sport.blog
That was, really, another of M. Donald Grant's attempts to assert his authority over the players—and pretty gross in its racial aspects.
On an average night, for the past 150 years or so, you could probably catch half-a-dozen ballplayers on any given team having sex in a van. Or, say, with the mayor's daughter in a preserved, WW II plane set up in the town square to honor our veterans—something that happened to Steve Whitaker in the minor leagues.
Jones was picked out to humiliate for some reason of Grant's—probably that he was making too much money, or was disrespectful to the contemptible old fraud. (Grant was a working-class guy who became a notorious old money poseur.) It was another low point in Mets history, that's for sure.
The reason the Yanks' away-game attendance average is so low is pretty simple. They've had a lot of games in Baltimore and Tampa, where the only people who show up are Yankees fans. Those two incredibly low-attendance parks would account for it.
Tanaka with the gopher ball again today. Oy. And Didi looks just a tad rusty at short. Just a tad.
Urshela was pretty clutch there.
Voit wasn't clutch. Too few at bats. Kendrys Morales should go to the all-star game instead. He has more career at bats. And there'e some statistic that says he's better. Somewhere. In someone's mind. Or lack of mind.
Funny, I thought Tanaka would be more pumped coming back from paternity leave. Basically, we have zero reliable starters.
And ALL-CAPS, so far it looks like you've called it: Kendrys has come alive versus the Metsies.
We'll see if the Arson Squad can hang on.
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
7 runs up.
They might not need to use Chapman this game...
Can we get Doctor Old to start a new thread for the next game?
OLU, damnit, not OLD
I can't do anything right anymore, can I?
Is their some kind of brain virus that afflicts people like Dufus T. Firefly and ALL-CRAPS so that they cannot make the simple conceptual distinction between clutch hits--which of course happen all the time--and clutch hitters--people who are consistently better than their typical performance in clutch situations--which is a provably false notion. Clutch hits--yes, they happen. Clutch hitters--people who consistently excel in clutch situations--do NOT exist, and have never existed.
I mean really--only people with IQs in the neighborhood of 80 or less can fail to grasp this very basic distinction. For example: It rains on a given day. We do not thereby deduce that it rains every day. We look at a broad sample of days over the years, or over many years, and see that it rains only 21 percent of the time. But retarded people like Dufus T. Firely and ALL-CRAPS see one clutch hit by Luke Voit and deduce that certain people get clutch hits all the time.
Shouldn't there by some kind of IQ screening for posters in this blog?
Here's a prime example. Try it with any other hitter in baseball history--you'll see the same thing. SUCK ON IT, Dufus T. Firefly and ALL-CRAPS!
Reggie Jackson
Total career slash line (11,418 plate appearances):
.262/.356/.490/.846
Career slash line for 2 outs and RISP (1,416 PA):
.252/.378/.473/.851
Career slash line for late and close (1,847 PA):
.251/.352/.452/.864
Forget IQ screening - there should be verified identities so that morons and anti-social people cannot post from behind the cowardly veil of anonymity.
Fine, 13bit--lead by example. Publish you real name, address, and phone number--ya' fucking hypocrite.
And I notice that you have no sermons to issue on the anti-social virulence of people who clog this blog with deranged ridicule of the working poor--the kind of people who struggle to survive in service-industry jobs that are just TOO PATHETIC for the losers who obsess over a baseball blog--like you.
13bit--And you want to know why you don't give a shit about all the psychopaths who spray this deranged diatribes? It's because you are intellectually lazy, a herd animal like them--you share their instinctive antipathy to analytics or any other original unorthodox thinking. So you sit on your hands when those assholes spray their abuse and assume your pose of bullshit sanctimony when someone gives them back a taste of their own--but only if that someone is effective in exposing the mental sloth of people like them and you.
Well tough shit. Now still waiting for your personal info, 13bit.
13bit--keeping the blog safe for mentally handicapped, abusive old farts. Great job!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
Doesn't take much to set you off, does it? Time to start saving all of your precious posts. It'll make for interesting fodder.
Meanwhile, from the secure bunker of the evil empire PR staff, the announcement that Toonces had another setback.
How long before Tommy John?
13bit--Oh really? Then why do you bother addressing any posts to me? Hypocrite much?
Please do save my posts--it might jog a few of your dead brain cells back to life.
Meantime, waiting for your name, address, phone number--and throw in your Social Security number while you're at it, tough guy.
Fuck off, worm.
13bit--not saving all the psychopathic vomit from the other posters who can't deal with analytics? You're just fine with all that, you spineless herd animal?
Who was the athletic, cheerful, power-hitting catcher the Yankees started today!? Have we seen him before? Did they trade for him? Call him up? Grow him in a vat at the old Polo Grounds? And what did the Yankees do with ICS? Strange times, strange times.
Stat Boy!®™ I need two sausage calzones, and make it snappy!!
Winnie, you trademarked the name? Imagine the marketing opportunities:
Underoos
Acne cream
Hand cream
Boy's Life
Pocket calculators
Spanish fly
The possibilities are endless!
Another great start.
Winnie, you trademarked the name? Imagine the marketing opportunities:
I really wish there was a "Like" button on this software platform. Nice job RTF.
I would add to your list:
- Official StatBoy Depends
- StatBoy Mail-order Bride Service
- StatBoy Cruex
- StatBoy Odor-resistant Orthotics
- StatBoy's Dating Tips for Used Car Salesmen
- StatBoy's Guide to Hiding Your Halitosis
- The Official StatBoy Hernia Truss
You're absolutely right, the possibilities are endless.
X-Ray vision glasses!
Winnie, don't forget your friends when those royalty checks come in!
Hey Warplist--I thought you were SO SENSITIVE about posts that display crudeness toward oppressed social groupings--yet you pile on in glee in a crude, vicious stereotype about the working poor. You're a disgusting, malicious psychopathic suburban Babbit with the sensibility of a frat house dunce, without an ounce of real compassion for anyone who doesn't tool around in Cadillacs.
Do you realize that most restaurant workers don't make enough to feed their families? And you think that these desperate people are a fit subject for your contempt and ridicule? You are subhuman scum. Why don't you read the following and acquaint yourself with some of the increasingly harsh social and economic realities outside the ambit of your planet-killing car collection:
https://truthout.org/articles/most-restaurant-workers-dont-earn-enough-to-feed-their-own-families/
Local Bargain Jerk's Guide to Preadolescent Frat House Wit.
It's remarkable how so many crude, stupid people think they're hilarious. As Socrates taught us, the most abominable ignorance is that which does not know itself.
Hey Warplist--why don't you take your carbon-poison Cadillac out for a spin? I guess the planet isn't burning up fast enough for you--right, you callous, diseased worm?
https://www.accuweather.com/en/weather-news/san-francisco-hotter-than-vegas-as-it-shatters-record-high-amid-extreme-heat-wave/70008516?fbclid=IwAR1RP0eN4fQz99HOQFy0mZH2avA6-xX-qHkPdc1ySTLR0jTYlH4lWuldxmA
Oh, by the way--proof that there's no such thing as a clutch hitter, for any of the assembled morons who haven't seen it yet. I can provide many other examples if you're interested, morons.
Reggie Jackson
Total career slash line (11,418 plate appearances):
.262/.356/.490/.846
Career slash line for 2 outs and RISP (1,416 PA):
.252/.378/.473/.851
Career slash line for late and close (1,847 PA):
.251/.352/.452/.864
Wow, millennials ARE snowflakes!
Always good to hear from Dufus T. Firefly, who thinks that 98 AB is a significant sample size in a career of 11,000 plate appearances. What was it, Dufus T.? Did your mother batter you about the head with a baseball bat at a tender age? Is that why you're so fucking stupid?
Reggie Jackson
Total career slash line (11,418 plate appearances):
.262/.356/.490/.846
Career slash line for 2 outs and RISP (1,416 PA):
.252/.378/.473/.851
Career slash line for late and close (1,847 PA):
.251/.352/.452/.864
I said NO anchovies!
Stat Boy!®™ Binkies
Stat Boy!®™ Onesies
Stat Boy!®™ Diapers
In other news, Paxton is stinking up the joint.
6 in 2.2. Remember to vote for the All-Star game. If only we could vote for pitchers.
All our starters are openers, and not very good ones. Unless they mean opening the door for the opponents.
Dufus T. Firefly--Resident Animal House wit and debased animal who thinks it's hilarious to ridicule a class of people who live in desperate economic straits--this from a old geezer who obsesses over a baseball blog. Dufus--I can assure you that any pizza joint worker has far more integrity and decency than a brainless, nasty herd animal like you.
Adams. Wow.
All we are saying is give Chance a chance.
Stat Boy!®™ Colic remedy
Dufus T. Firefly--at your advanced age, there's no remedy for your chronic stupidity and witlessness. That's your sickening fate from here to eternity--dumb guy and Internet loser.
Ok, Chance didn't take advantage of this chance. Ouch.
ugly
Don't get sand kicked in your face!
Get Stat Boy's!®™ Jack Lalanne super muscle builder.
I love you people so very much! Not you Puckered®™, you a sad angry Turdlet ®™.
I'm just gonna run with this ...
Fuckers!!!!
Stat Boy!®™ Day Care Center
Just checked in on the game. Eeeuuuwwwwww ... Chance may end up with a better line than Tanaka and Paxton.
Luv ya Rufus T.
Are you Mrs. Teasdale?
Paxton is useless. Aside from that first game vs Boston what has he done? And Clint Frazier is a poor man's Giancarlo. So now I have to back Cameron Maybin because I don't like the other options.
What in the actual fuck?
I'M GETTING THAT SINKING FEELING WITH PAXTON.
COOP DID IT AGAIN.
HE JUST CAN'T TRADE FOR A PITCHER THAT MAKES A DIFFERENCE FOR US.
NO MATTER WHAT OR WHO HE GIVES UP.
IT'S 2 DECADES NOW.
Hey Warplist--do you love Dufus "callassally"? You make a great match--he's so dumb that he can't spell either. Hope you two morons are very happy together!
LBJ, JUST SAW YOUR CLEON JONES STORY....
LOVED IT.
NUDE IN A VAN. (HOW'S THE WIFE?)...
LOL
Hey Warplist--you seem to have no answer about your contempt for the working poor--your joining in a jackal pack of derision at the plight of the working poor. Did you read the piece I sent on restaurant workers and see that 80 percent of them are women of color? So you're spitting on women of color--how very UN-PC of you. Keep that in mind the next time you mount your high horse to accuse Carl or anyone else of speaking ill of women. Right now no one can top you on that score--you who heap derision on the struggling wretched of the earth--you subhuman scum.
Dufus T. Firefly--the moron who thinks it's hilarious to snicker at crude frat-boy stereotypes of service workers who are struggling to stay alive in this neoliberal shithouse of an economy. Go back to your rathole where you can feast on the turds of your boy/girlfriend, Warplist.
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I’m Stat Boy, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!
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