Tuesday, July 20, 2021

The Iceman Bloweth

(Written by HoraceClarke66) 
You know, I hate to pile on, but…Aww, who the hell am I kidding? 

love to pile on, and now that the Miami Millstone is about to play the field for  the first time in two years, I can’t help myself.

 

We all know the stories of Yankees greats in the past climbing out of hospital beds and brothels to win a key game or series, right?  

 

Joe, Joe DiMaggio flying up to Boston at the last minute to rout the Red Sox in a key series in 1949. 

 

The Mick limping to the plate on half-a-knee and a hangover the size of Oklahoma to belt the game-winning, pinch-hit home run on numerous occasions in the 1960s, and somehow managing to not puke until he had reached the clubhouse again.

 

The Great One, Mariano Rivera, confessing after he had wrapped up the deciding game in the 2009 World Series—the last one any of us will ever see the New York Yankees win—that he was hurting so bad he didn’t know if he could pitch.

 

Then there’s Giancarlo.

 

Critical series against the hated Red Sox. Every other Yankee, including his Twin Tower, Aaron Judge, felled by the cowpox. 

 

The team was up against it, and the breaks were beating the boys. Time to win one for us all—right, Mr. Stanton?

 

Wrong.

 

Instead, Giancarlo was as icy cold as he has been for over a month-and-a-half now. Against some highly hittable Sox pitchers. 

 

In what was otherwise a marvelously gutsy, hustling win over the Carmine Hose, the workout king sang songs of futility.

 

Stanton was 0-12 on the series. That’s right: not one, measly, infield single. Not even a walk—just 5 strikeouts. He did manage an RBI—on a groundball that narrowly missed becoming his 14thdouble-play on the season.

 

But that’s par for a long course now. Our icy slugger has had 116 plate appearances since June 10th. In that time, he’s managed 3 home runs and 12 ribbies. Two doubles, no triples. Some 20 walks—and 30 strikeouts.

 

But even that’s deceptive. For the entire month of July, Giancarlo has all of 3 walks, and 14 Ks. 

 

Our big bopper, our last slugger standing, has iced up just when we need him most.  


To paraphrase Oliver Cromwell, by all means put Stanton in the outfield, he has sat too long for any good he has been doing. And let’s hope that hastens his departure.





59 comments:

JM said...

I'll miss having a good outfielder out there, but as Trey and Locastro know, those walls are not very forgiving.

Not that I wish ill on anyone, but just saying.

JM said...

Gardner is leading off? Are you kidding me? Jesus Christ. And Rob Brantley?? What the fuck is going on here?

Anonymous said...

Gardner's swing looks very slow. Stanton taking strike three again is zero bat speed. What is it with Cashman and these crippling long term contracts? You would think a bulb would have gone off after the Ellsbury fiasco.

ranger_lp said...

Gardner has a one year deal. Hopefully his last one year deal.

If Hicks were semi-healthy, we would have seen Gardner so much...

ranger_lp said...

wouldn't = would

Anonymous said...

Gardner should never have been re-signed and should be dfa'ed now, all irrespective of Hicks. Plus the Hicks contract was another Cashman folly. He's got a million of 'em.

TheWinWarblist said...

Garner should have been given some sort of farewell tour last year and not resigned. We still have time left this year to give him a nice send off to make sure he isn't on the roster next year. Call it The Banging on The Ceiling Farewell Tour. Give him a freaking Day. But no more.

TheWinWarblist said...

Hey, did you see the Florial hit behind the runner and got the run in?!?

ZacharyA said...

Best part is Gardner’s contract comes with an option for 2022 which you just know Cashman will pick up.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Why can't the Yankees find players like Torreyes?

Wait, what?

Never mind.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Odor is going to be DFA's before the game is over.

TWO bunts in three days? Blasphemy (in Daffy Duck voice)!

Anonymous said...

Kaperlian has the lowest ERA for rookies? Why can't the Yankees find players like that?

Wait what?

Doug K.

13bit said...

Never forget - this is Brian's team. What you see out here is his. He owns this mess. He is responsible for the team, the farm, the training staff - you name it. THE BUCK STOPS WITH BRIAN. Yes, Brian does serve at Hal's pleasure, but Hal is clearly happy with Brian and thus endorses every move Brian makes, has made and will make. This is Brian's team

Winnie, if you saw this on an earlier thread and answered, please forgive me for not going back to check, but I have been wondering - can someone be vaccinated, get an asymptomatic or mild case of Covid, then end up with Long Covid symptoms in 8 months? Or is there just not enough data yet to know such things? I am just a dumb Yankee fan.

And remember, this is Brian's team.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Billy Martin would have the squeeze play on here.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Gardner must read this website.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

I guess the Yankees might be able to trade the windmill to the Phillies.

JM said...

Allen is my new favorite Yankee. Great speed, and knows how to use it.

You know the pitcher is severely rattled when he gives up a home run to Gardner and Stanton gets a hit. Toast.

JM said...

And a big thank you to Didi for throwing the ball away. We appreciate it, man.

JM said...

Q: Why isn't Allen leading off and Gardner batting eighth?

A: Boone is an idiot.

JM said...

Now we leave Lugnut in until he walks in the tying run.

TheWinWarblist said...

Blogger TheWinWarblist CUTS AND PASTES...

The RNA vaccines, Pfizer and Moderna, and J&J are all effective in preventing infection, and especially effective at preventing serious infection requiring oxygen, hospitalization/ICU and excellent at preventing death. But the Delta variants are here now. They are rapidly becoming predominant across the world. They are more infectious and probably more lethal too. Vaccinated individuals can be infected, but are still very well protected from serious infection requiring oxygen, hospitalization and ICU care. And are still extremely well protected from dying. Those still dying of COVID in the USA are almost exclusively unvaccinated.

No vaccine is perfect. No natural immunity is perfect. If you are exposed to a large enough inoculum of virus you will be infected. We are certain now that the "natural" immunity from being infected wanes quickly and that an individual can be infected a second time. The vaccines provide better immunity than a prior infection.

Bitty, it is not clear if the vaccinated are also protected from long COVID syndrome. They probably are(?) but diagnosis of the syndrome is unclear at best.

This is not over. The Delta variants are here. The fourth wave has started. Stay safe. Be prudent in your contacts. Wear a mask when in public. Don't let unvaccinated individuals into you home. Wash your hands.

I will leave you with the sage words of the great 13bit: Fuck everybody. I love you all.

July 15, 2021 at 7:28 PM Delete

TheWinWarblist said...

Looking for more to add.

JM said...

Ice cream!!!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Um...this is fun. I haven't had this much fun watching a ballgame since 2019, the last time the Yankees' regulars all got hurt.

Hmm...Mooooooore than coincidence???

Anonymous Bosch said...

All very well and good, but what will happen when the usual suspects slowly stagger back from the IL?

TheWinWarblist said...

Okay, quick literature search shows we don't even have criteria to define long COVID, much less a diagnostic test. It's more common and more severe in those hospitalized especially in the ICU. But that's all we know so far.

This is only a few months old:

"Long covid, the name commonly used to explain lasting effects of covid-19, may actually be four different syndromes, according to a review by the National Institute for Health Research (NIHR).1

A team of researchers and doctors reviewed current evidence and interviewed post-hospitalized and non-hospitalized patients and reported that long covid did not seem to fit as one syndrome. They suggested that people experiencing long term effects of covid-19 may have different syndromes such as post-intensive care syndrome, post-viral fatigue syndrome, and long term covid syndrome."


There is so much we do not know. It's like the first years of the AIDS epidemic; so many questions without answers. 30 years later there are TV ads for one-pill-a-day treatments for HIV that offer the promise of being permanently disease free.

HoraceClarke66 said...

How is it that we are not putting on a play with Tyler Wade up?

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Hoss,

Boone happens.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Oh, right: We were waiting for him to hit into the perfect DP!

Speaking of people I am tired of seeing on your New York Yankees...

But also:

That blew my last gasket of patience regarding Marionette Boone.

You won't put on a play even when the starters are out and the scrubbeenies are running the Phils off the field? Sorry, but you will deserve the inevitable tossing under the proverbial bus.

Leinstery said...

Tyler Wade should only bunt or try to slap a ball to the left side. Any decent manager would tell him he sucks and should use his speed to get cheap hits, but Boone wouldn't want to hurt his feelings.

Pocono Steve said...

Yeah, I was going to say, how is it that Odor realizes he needs to get cheap hits but Wade doesn't?

TheWinWarblist said...

6 straight pitches out of the strike zone. The Master is amazed. I'm amazed Boone isn't using the vaunted Yankee stat metrics to summon rain.

JM said...

Stanton!!!

Incredible.

ranger_lp said...

Since we signed Britton, we've never seen Baltimore Britton...

DickAllen said...

Realmuto...doing his best Sanchez imitation.

Thank you very much.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Not that good, but he's pitched very well for us, mostly.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Flower power!

DickAllen said...

You have to wonder what took for the Brain to call up Florial - a pandemic, perhaps?

TheWinWarblist said...

Florial is Adorable-ial!!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Not that I'm forgiving that dick of a home plate ump for calling a third strike on Greg Allen literally a foot outside of the strike zone.

Yeah, I know: the guys battling for his last chance to make a major-league roster. And you've got dinner reservations.

Of course, that might be a good time for Ma to come out and loose his shit. But whattaya want? He's no Luis Rojas.

Anonymous Bosch said...

Does Foodstamps get a group discount on bus tickets to Scranton?

TheWinWarblist said...

The Master and Suzyn are in rapture over the running and the bunting and the youth enjoying themselves. It fun to listen to. They like the 4 HRs too.

ranger_lp said...

Estevan made a Florial arrangement into the right field seats...

HoraceClarke66 said...

So, NO ONE has the ingenuity to break the sprinkler system?

HoraceClarke66 said...

Love the guy in the box seats already throwing up his hands.

DickAllen said...

i'm beginning to sweat

HoraceClarke66 said...

So it's definitely mental, right?

Pocono Steve said...

How will Chapman ruin everything tonight?

13bit said...

Thnx, Win!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Well there's one!

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Step one:

DickAllen said...


shit. here we go

DickAllen said...


phew

TheWinWarblist said...

Thuuhuhuhuhuh Yankees win. So what. Fuck everybody.


Love you all.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

The ump get the assist on the last strikeout.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Well, make-up call, fine. We'll take it.

Could do without the return of The Stare, though.

Pocono Steve said...

Yeah, the stare--the I-couldn't-preserve-a-one-run-lead-if-I-had-to stare.

EDB said...

Stanton AKA Tissue Paper Mon, AKA Stiffton, is a stiff. Plain and simple. Derek Jeter exacted his revenge on Genius Cashman and is laughing every day. Now The Yankees have this giant albatross.

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