Thursday, April 3, 2025

Statement on Yankeetruth Social

From our own Carl J. Weitz... 

The team may have lost the game yesterday, but there's a bright side! Most people didn't realize it, but the Yankees proclaimed "FAN LIBERATION DAY." All non-Yankees fans will be charged an additional 25% on tickets and concessions. THIS WILL QUICKLY LOWER THE PRICES WE PAY and enable Hal to spend heavily from this moment on for free agents. No more losing. We're going to be rich. MAKE THE YANKEES GREAT AGAIN!!!

Occam's Mailbox.

 

Hey Kids, William of Ockham here. Just back from hanging out with the Venerable Bede, and boy is my brain tired! 

Hey, I kid, I kid. Time to take a razor to that mailbox!

A certain Mr. Hammer from Planet Earth wonders if the Yankees are deliberately holding back the progress of Jasson Dominguez (of Planet Mars) to delay having to pay him—maybe even deliberately blowing out his throwing arm.

He wonders if the Yanks' signing of (bad) free agents over developing the kids is part of the same plot.

I feel ya, Hammer—but no need to go full conspiracy theory on us.  

At last month's NYC SABR meeting—yes, I am everywhere—Anthony McCarron (helluva nice guy, incidentally), told us that "Hal is not cheap," pointing to the Yanks' $300 million payroll.

No question: $300 million is a lot of money. But if you're so willing to spend that in the cause of winning it all...why would you possibly keep Brian Cashman in charge of it?

As you may have heard, Cashman, at 28 years and counting, is now the longest serving GM of any North American sports team who did not also own said team...with the exception of Red Auerbach, who ran the Boston Celtics for 56 years.

Auerbach—and Red, knock it off with the cigars, already—won a total of 16 NBA championships (9 while doubling as coach).

Cashman championships on teams that did not include the Core of Four? 0. That's zero, zilch, nada.

So...why would you keep this guy on if you wanted your $300 million spent wisely? Only to AVOID winning the World Series. 

No need to hatch plots to injure guys. Just leave the obedient fool in place to keep the team sort of contending, without ever winning it all. The result? Ever-increasing profit margins. 

That's all ye can know, and all ye need to know on this earth (Hey, steal from the best!). 

Incidentally, Duque? You're wrong: Hal's management is proof that there IS a God. He's just way too merciful to lesser cities.

Well, gotta step. Eternity doesn't last forever, you know—even though it probably seemed so at that Yankees game last night.

And like I always say:  Numquam ponenda eat pluralitas sine necessitate.

See ya round the ballpark.







It's Overreaction Week: Five "Meh" games, five "Meh" takeaways...

The philosopher, Aaron Boone, calls this time of year "Overreaction Week." Honestly, he's got a point. 

Five games in, any reaction is a kneejerk, and the wisest critique of the 2025 Yankees is to STFU and flush the toilet. 

We can bemoan the bottom of the batting order, as the zeroes march to and from the plate. But tonight could bring a deluge, and we'll just look more like the overreactive fools that we are.

Here's a cheap prediction: One month from now, we will be embarrassed by whatever the fuck we said this week. Fortunately, we don't know what's coming. Otherwise, we'd grab the loaded Luger.

But but BUT... in the spirit of Warner Wolf, here are five fast takeaways.

1. In the super Dodgers - now 8-0 - MLB might finally be glimpsing the Babadook. 

Entering last winter, they had the best team in baseball, which they then supplemented with the best player from Japan and the best free agent pitcher, with the highest payroll. They will steamroll the NL West - (San Diego's 7-0 is a blip) - then win the NLCS, and then the world series. And next winter, they'll do it again.

For decades now, the Yankees' vast upper level mediocrity has saved MLB from the super team that buys pennants. (When I look at Hal, I always have the same thought: There is no God.) Rather than spend on yesterday, the Dodgers build for tomorrow. The baseball world is witnessing what money and acumen can do. The Yankees did it in the 1990s, nearly 30 years ago. They didn't learn.   

2. By June, talk this talk about torpedo bats will draw chuckles and - if there is a God - embarrassment from the chatterers. To make a bat actually matter, you must hit the baseball. Therein lies the problem. 

Last night, the Yankees struck out 16 times. That's not a typo. They average 10 per game (ahead of six teams, including Boston, with 11.) Every spring, they bring in a new batting guru, with a new scheme and new philosophy - a new bullshit reason for us to think things will change. Then we watch everything coagulate into a chasm of strikeouts, walks and home runs. 

Last night, as they marched to home plate - and then back to the dugout - one conclusion rose above all others: I can't watch nine innings of these games. It's just... boring. 

3. Cody Bellinger can play CF. Last night, he handled blasts that I shudder to imagine how The Martian would have played. He turned his back to the ball, ran to the track, spun around and made it look easy. He saved Carlos Rodon from what could have been a two-inning battering. 

Thus far, in the late innings, the Yankees have been replacing The Martian in LF, due to his still-questionable fielding. They move Trent Grisham into CF, and Bellinger takes left. But make no mistake: Bellinger can hold his own.

4. It's hard to note all the changes in the 2025 Yankees - Soto, Bellinger, Dominguez, et al - when this team so resembles last year's disappointing finale. Yeah, they won the AL pennant, but this lineup seems to have picked up right where Game 5 left off. 

It is becoming part of Yankee lore to strikeout three or four times a game. Everybody does it. I wonder: Can Judge lead us from this fog? 

5. Okay, gotta mention Babe Volpe. He's had a week. By golly, if he can hit, say, 30 HRs - that is, keep going to RF - this could be a breakout season. Everybody else, thus far, looks the same. Volpe looks different. 

Then again, it's Overreaction Week

Wednesday, April 2, 2025

Game Thread: New York New York vs. That's Life


 What song will play at the end of the game? 

So much for the torpedo bats. And so much for expectations. The first out-of-body loss of 2025 brings a harsh Yankee reality check

Well, so much for the hopes and anticipation thing.

The great Yankee bubble of 2025 has popped. It didn't last long: three (3) games to be precise, against a measles outbreak from Milwaukee, before our bullpen blew like a tire on the Thruway.

If you're scoring the category of GAMES WE SHOULDA FUCKINANY WON, the total now stands at one (1). In the Don Zimmer Thesaurus of terse explanations, we fuckinay shoulda won. 

So, buck up and get used to it? Maybe. But the jolt will linger. For three games, we nosed the red button and received a food pellet. Last night, we nosed it and got 500 volts. The YES announcers reran Scott Brosius' world series HR, and Paul O'Neill relived his stadium tribute, but grainy videos cannot restore the last era when the Yankees ruled - an experience we probably won't see again in our lifetimes.

It happened against Arizona, which - it must never forgotten - celebrated its 2001 world series victory by mockingly playing "New York, New York" over the P.A. system, only days after the World Trade Center fell. I never need motivation to beat Arizona. I just remember them singing sarcastically with Frank. 

But but BUT... this is not about 2001. It's about last night, when the Death Barge blew a completely winnable game - an outing we assumed would be ours, until it wasn't. 

Grand slams will do that. Something about a Yankee Grand Slam Loss - it leaves a lifetime mark. Before last night, we were still mulling Freddie Freeman's blast in the 10th inning of game one, the homer that - in retrospect - sealed LA's championship march. But the list of Yankee soul-crushing HRs - from Mazeroski to Altuve, from Damon to Devers - rolls from our memories like bloody sequences from David Cronenberg films. Once seen, never forgotten. 

You could call last night a bullpen loss, and - technically - you wouldn't be wrong. But that would mean ignoring our first four batters - Goldy, Bellinger, Judge and Jazz -  who went 0-15 with nine strikeouts. So much for outlawing the torpedo bat. (If you're luxuriating in Boston's current woes, here's a Calgon Bath Oil Bead: Rafael Devers is 15 for 19 in strikeouts, he hates DH, and the Redsocks are 1-4. Ha ha.) 

Generally, an out-of-body loss in April gets pitched out with the AARP junk mail. It's too soon to suffer a mortal wound. It's one game - one that WE FUCKINAY SHOULDA WON. Get used to it. There will be about 60 more.

Tuesday, April 1, 2025


 

An Above Average Haiku Tuesday ~ April Fools - (Late) Edition !


  Fish Don't Fart Metal
  Torpedo Our Hopes and Dreams
  Its Sink or Swim, Chum!

Torpedo!

Torpedo! From the Latin Tor, meaning a book publishing company specializing in Science Fiction paperbacks, and pedo, meaning uh, let’s not go there. 

Torpedo! 

No longer the answer to a trivia question about McHale's Navy, torpedos are back. 

Hey, quick question... If the Yankees sink the Dodgers pitching staff in this year's World Series by means of their torpedo bats will any body make that connection? And will they lose their job? 

But I digress... 

People need to stop complaining about the new bats and calling it cheating. It’s not cheating. The bats are made of wood. Not some polymer or made from repurposed superballs…

Quick side story here… 

During the 1980’s I had a friend who had a friend whose father was a jobber. He had several warehouses down in Santa Ana. I got invited to go look at them for some reason that is still not clear to me and in one of them, in sacks stacked floor to ceiling were actual Wham-O superballs. Real ones with the atomic sign on them and everything.

There were so many of them that the floor of the warehouse was covered in loose ones that fell out of ripped sacks, and you could glide across the room like on ball bearings.

They guy said I could take some and, being polite, I took ten. I should have stuffed my pockets. I still have two. I gave away three and five more suffered from the fate of all superballs… the dreaded second bounce into oblivion. Gone!

He told me that the ones in the warehouse were bought from the government. Apparently the Air Force was looking into using giant bowling ball size superballs as a weapon. 

The  idea was to drop a superball into a building and let the bouncing action destroy the room without an explosion or fire. It would also limit the damage to the room in which it was dropped.

Couldn’t tell you how the bowling ball sized superball got into the room but hey that’s what tax dollars are for.  The plan obviously failed as any of us could have told them. You drop it on Moscow. It bounces once. Hits Prague. And then right into the Adriatic Sea. Gone!

But I digress…

Look, the Torpedo Bat is just an equipment upgrade. Like bigger infielder gloves or running shoes.

Did anybody complain when runners switched to running shoes? I mean aside from Buster Brown whose ill-fated attempt at the Bruce Jenner Buster Brown Running Shoe was a large part of why Buster Brown went out of business. 


If they stuck around they could have tried again with a line of high heels.

But I digress…

As long as the bat is made of wood and meets the height, weight, and length MLB specifications it’s fine.  Besides, there’s a downside to moving the sweet spot, in closer to the hands. The wood available for the outside pitch is reduced, affecting the velocity when going to the opposite field on an outside pitch.

And therein lies the solution for the pitcher. Don’t come inside. Work the outer half of the plate as much as possible to reduce the efficacy of the torpedo bat.

In other news…

Rafael Devers is still hitless and has struck out 15 times 19 at bats. People are blaming it on weight gain. Maybe he’s been ordering too many of the wrong kind of torpedos. 

(Don't watch this. It's stupid!) 

Or, it could be because he’s trying to suck his way off the Red Sox because they gave 3B to a guy who can actually play the position.

What does this mean for the Yankees? Well, we still haven’t overpaid for a third baseman yet and we’ve gotten third basemen from Boston before, albeit with mixed results. Boggs and Youklis. I hope this doesn’t come to pass although, I’ve heard pinstripes are slimming. 

Does the torpedo bat controversy illustrate why NYC sports teams can never succeed?

Over the first three games of 2025, Jersey boy Anthony Volpe delighted his hometown cousins with two HRs, invigorating hopes that had gone dormant for two dreary seasons.

If Volpe can hit, say, 30 HRs, it would herald a breakout year. He could become a bedrock part of the Yankee infield and an offensive weapon. He's off to a great start: Two HRs! It's not exactly Ruthian: He's one of 34 MLB hitters with two or more. So, in a perfect world, NYC would be celebrating Volpe's potential big year. Start spreadin' the news, right?

Well, no. Sadly, Volpe's output has become Exhibit A in the media's ongoing prosecution of the Yankees, a tribunal that never ends. Instead of hope for Volpe, Austin Wells and Jazz Chisholm - each of whom has two or more HRs - the tabloids have questioned whether "torpedo" bats have caused the recent surge. Last night, like trained seals, the network TV news reports weighed in: Are torpedo bats a threat to your children? Do they undermine truth, justice and the American way? 

It was as if Volpe didn't hit the HRs. His bat did.

Listen: If the KC Royals had belted 15 HRs over the weekend in Milwaukee, think we'd know about it? But in NYC, someone's gotta channel Al Pacino: "I'M OUTA ORDER? YOU'RE OUTA ORDER!"  There's always an outrage, a reason to scream. 

Listen: I'm not bemoaning "fake news." Warts and all, the feral news media remains one of the NYC's great traditions. Be it Pizza Rat or Abe Beam, there's always something to raise our blood pressure. But if you're a Yank fan - or if you follow any NY team - here we fucking go again.

The Yankees enjoy three high-scoring games, and - of course! - they must be using illegal undocumented bats. The Mets sign Juan Soto, and - of course! - they're overpaying. The Giants keep their coaches, because they cannot change. The Jets fire their coaches, because they are unstable. The Knicks and Rangers - fuckit - they're the Knicks and Rangers. Now, we can add St. John's basketball, and every glorious flop will reassure us that the media's doomsday rage was right all along.

Can't we ever have nice things? 

Must we break every toy, moments after unwrapping it?

Listen: As cynical and pessimistic Yank fans, we know what's coming: 

A market correction. Instead of 10 runs in one game, we'll score one run in 10. Volpe's third HR? It might come in May. 

Is anything less meaningful than the first weekend of a baseball season. A guy hitting .400? An opposite field HR? A new season of Tracker? Something, anything, to do with a Kardashian? Damn...  

But every year, we pour all our hopes into NY teams, and nothing changes, except - what? - the barrel of the bats? Gimme a break. Wake me at the end of April, then we'll debate Volpe's power surge.

Monday, March 31, 2025

Forget Mantle and Maris. We've got Judge and Jazz. But damn the torpedoes, hide the bats!

MLB HR leader board
Fifteen HRs in three games will grab eyeballs, and today, the grim glare of MLB is fixed upon us, wondering if the Yankees somehow hacked that primal weapon of ball fields and bedrooms, the vengeful shillelagh - the great American baseball bat. 

As a physicist, sportsman, and advocate for pure science, I feel compelled to pose the essential questions here: What the fuck? And... holy shit?

Have the Yankees found a competitive advantage? Could machine-engorged Yankee barrels bring about a new era of tape-measure self-pleasure? Did some MIT big brain find baseball's Arc of the Covenant? And if so, how long before our enemies catch up, and turn baseball into Pete Alonso at the HR derby? A month? A week? The next few days?  

Listen: Baseball history is full of system hacks. Remember Moneyball? Or when Tampa led the world in defensive over-shifts? The Rays also invented the bullpen start. The Astros used cameras and garbage cans. The Dodgers have built an underground railroad for Japanese free agents. The Mets have uncorked limitless wealth. And have the Yankees tweaked the system with bats shaped like "torpedoes?" Fifteen HRs in three games says, maybe. But before we assign asterisks to BAs, a few thoughts:

1. They were three games against Milwaukee. 

2. They were the first three games of 2025. Remember last year, when Oswaldo Cabrera mimicked like the Second Coming of Mike Schmidt? 

3. Five came against Nasty Nestor Cortes, who we figured - in returning home - would either spin a revenge masterpiece or get raked. Turned out to get the latter.

4. Several were Yankee Stadium HRs, into the right field gift shop. That's Yankee baseball, folks. (And let's see if Tampa can replicate the numbers in their mini-stadium.)

5. Aaron Judge - with 4 HRs - hasn't used the torpedo. 

6. Giancarlo used it last season, had a normal Stanton year, and it might have fucked up his elbows. 

But but BUT... in the name of Gaylord Perry, who used the spitball as a psychological  ploy - the Yankees should spread forth the notion that they have found an advantage. They should guard the torpedoes like a recipe for chicken salad. Let the world think that Anthony Volpe has turned into A-Rod, that Jazz Chisholm will hit 50, and that our routine pop flies will land in the bullpen. 

Should there be a physicist wing in Cooperstown? If a few more balls start landing in Monument Park, who knows?  

Sunday, March 30, 2025

Game Thread: Yankees vs. Milwaukee

 




Nine HRs, 20 runs: Did the Yankees just use up their full juju allotment for the next month?

Admit it: A 20-run Yankee laugher brings out the worst in us. The absolute worst.

It's why we're so deliciously reviled. To flash a Yankee cap in Bumfuck,  Alabama, is like wearing MAGA crimson to a Tesla protest. The toothless, flyover dorks see NY and think it stands for "Not You," while we relentlessly pleasure ourselves in a four-hour beatdown. They think that, as insufferable Yank fans, we should be grateful for all the winning seasons, for the Danny Tartabulls, even when everything drains into pure humiliation, as last October did. They think we have it cushy, better than we deserve, and we don't appreciate it. 

And, honestly, on a 20-run win, they're sorta right... which only infuriates them more.   

Me? I'm livid - LIVID - that Aaron Judge's late-inning double - hardest whack of the day - hit the top of the wall, denying him a 4th HR by the length of a Boone bubble gum balloon. WTF, juju gods? If Judge finishes 2025 one HR shy of the all-time record, that ball will be the reason. It should have gone out. His ticket to Cooperstown should have been punched. On any true scale of power, Judge yesterday hit four.  

So, yeah, of course I'm pissed! The  greatest Yankee slugger of our lives - look at the numbers; there can be no argument about this - nearly inscribed his name into history, along with 16 others, including Lou Gehrig, Willie Mays and Mike Schmidt. Instead, he's in the three HR category with more than 100, including Bo Bichette and Ben Rice. And we're supposed to be happy? Hoo-fucking-ray.   

Okay, let's appreciate that the Yankees scored 20 runs on 16 hits, including 9 HRs.

The joke says they faced Nasty Nestor, a secretly embedded Yankee spy. This would explain three gophers on his first three pitches. If I were a Brewers fan, I would be terrified, because most ex-Yanks, upon returning, kill us. It's something about their anger and sense of betrayal. When Cortes was listed as starter, I automatically figured he'd go seven. He managed two, with eight runs. Ouch. 

Unfortunately, Max Fried couldn't last five, to receive a courtesy win. Boone ended up dredging the bullpen with the law firm of Gomez, Headrick and Carrasco. You could argue that everyone got a chance to start 2025 - Carrasco, the vaunted reclamation project - got beaten up for three runs on five hits. Should we worry? Of course. 

Today, we'll learn whether the Yankees just used up their juju allotment for the next month. We've seen it often. They score 10, then give us a week of zeros. Maybe today will be different? Maybe today, we can decide to celebrate?

Saturday, March 29, 2025


 

Play Ball?


 

Scranton opened its season yesterday and - sorry, folks - but there's nothing much to see.

Yesterday, amid the gaiety and hoopla of Opening Day in Allentown - (fun facts: it's the third largest city in Pennsylvania and birthplace to Lil Peep) - the Scranton Railriders launched 2025 with a loss to the always-tough IronPigs of Lehigh Valley. 

Don't worry: This is not a game write-up. 

Instead, for a brief exercise in self-torture, take a long, lingering glance at the roster to the right. Focus on each name. Do you feel lost? Do you feel tired? Wanna feel old? Consider this: Brandon Leibrandt - who started yesterday for Scranton - is the 32-year-old son of Charlie Leibrandt, who once pitched for the KC Royals.

"A veteran pitcher who understands how to pitch," summarized manager Shelley Duncan, who also might make you feel ancient.

Three active Railriders - Eric Reysaleman, Jorbit Vivas and Everson Pereira - were born in this millennium. Everybody else is side-eyeing 30, either having languished in the Yankee system, or having hooked up this winter, when they realized the franchise would be going through pitchers like Lucy devouring chocolates on a deranged assembly line. 

What you don't see is Spencer Jones, the former first-round pick, who hit .250 this spring with three HRs in Tampa, and who played 122 games last year at Double A Somerset, where he hit .259. Apparently, Jones did not make the Triple A roster. Not sure why. Would it be optimism to hope that he's got the measles? 

Whatever. Either way, Jones' absence denied Yankee fans their chance to follow a legitimate top 20 franchise prospect. 

The current Railriders are a collection of journeymen, spare parts and and third-chancers, such as Vivas and Pereira. I don't mean to demean them; either could play an important role in 2025. But they are not youngsters who generate long term hope. The franchise does have a few distant stars - George Lombard Jr. and Roderick Arias top the list - but aside from Jones, Scranton might not see any of them this summer. (And let's face it: If Jones doesn't hit in Somerset, his Triple A arrival could be delayed.)

I don't mean to be negative. But it's now been about five years since the Yankees boasted a top-rated farm system, which was Brian Cashman's original long term management strategy.  Eons ago, when Cashman assumed control, he vowed that the Yankees would build up their core from the minors and supplement through free agency. 

What a joke. What a complete and utter failure. Instead, for the last 15 years, the Yankees have been consistently hogtied by horrible contracts to aging players, and here we are, watching a Triple A team that cannot even field one major impact prospect.

And by the way, it can be done. Year after year, the Dodgers and Tampa Rays maintain some of most fruitful farm systems in MLB. The Dodgers supplement with free agents. The Rays are just too cheap.

This year, we can also beware of Boston, which is stocked to the gills with young players. 

And Spencer Jones will start - gulp - in Somerset? WTF? He had 482 ABs there last year. Four hundred eighty two. He hit 17 HRs. He's going back for year II? WTF? 

Friday, March 28, 2025

A Different Kind of Opening

Per my now six year old tradition on Opening Day, I bring a photo of my dad sitting in his recliner up on my laptop and watch the game with him. 

It's a much better venue for a conversation than standing graveside talking about why Cole isn't starting, my hopes for his grandchildren and for Austin Wells. 

Not necessarily in that order. 

Of all the things I miss about his not being around, talking to him during a game is easily number one. I can't tell you how many times I still reach for the phone in the course of a year. 

He was former high school basketball coach in the Bronx and helped me to see the game inside the game and, whatever sport we watched, he always brought insight and compassion. 

For example, he didn't like booing. He believed that athletes are always giving their best. Then again he never got to see Gleyber play. So there's that. 

His favorite player was DiMaggio. 

He would have loved Judge. 

It's hard to for me to comprehend but he never got to see him play. 

Moreover, what I realized yesterday, is that by passing away seven years ago, he missed the entirety of my participation on this blog. 

He would have gotten a real kick out of reading all of us. Well except the "Fuck Boone. Fuck Brian. Fuck Hal." part. He might have felt similarly in terms of disappointment but would have expressed it differently. 

Opening Day.  The Yankees won and I got a nice visit in. Sometimes that's all you get. Sometimes that's enough. 

"Hey now!" the Drop-Off, and Soto Derangement Syndrome: Five takeaways from Day One

Undefeated, untied, and unviolated. That's where we stand: Unbeaten, unbroken, and unbuckled. And a bit unnerved.  

Five takeaways from Opening Day...

1. "Hey now!" Dave Sims, the Seattle-honed radio replacement for The Master, seemed to charm Suzyn, the most important person in the Yankiverse. Several times, she seemed utterly tickled by Sims. (Though, it apparently remains her job to rain down the incessant in-game commercials, electrified by the Jeep brand.)  

In the late innings, with a 6'8" Brewers pitcher on the mound and shadows roiling everyone's vision, Sims noted that "he's so tall that his head is in the sun," causing Suzyn to chuckle. For all their famous chemistry, I cannot recall John Sterling saying something that drew from her a belly laugh.  

Instead of Sterling's HR calls, Sims shouted his trademark, "Hey, now!" And the game ended without a Win Warble. It certainly isn't the same - it cannot be. But Sims is a pro. He seemed to win over Suzyn. That's a start.

2. The newly minted closer, Devin Williams, did not win over anybody, except maybe the cardiac unit at Mount Sinai. At one point, ESPN analyst Bill Schroeder touched a nerve, mentioning that this was a "typical" Williams save. 

Excuse me? A "typical" inning? Tying runs on second? Two hits and a walk? Are you kidding me? I cannot take another Aroldis "Houdini" Holmes - that is, the closer who always fills the bases, who always sends us to the point of madness. Nope. That's not how this guy was sold to us. He was supposed to throw "the air-bender," which nobody can hit. 

Later, the ESPN team inferred that Williams is why Owner Hal eliminated the Beard Ban. Is that a joke? For this, we went scruffy? Hey, now! 

3. In the Mets loss, Juan Soto went 1-for-3 and left a runner in scoring position. Ha ha. Fuck you, Soto. NY went 0-6 with Runners In Scoring Position. 

Looks like Soto brought with him some of last year's Yankee magic. Let the negative juju commence. 

4. Troubling was the drop off in the heart of the Yankee order. Goldy, Jazz and The Martian: 0-10 with four Ks. Of course, one game means nothing. But that bottomless hole signifies the sum of all our fears: 

That once a pitcher gets past Judge, we fall into a crevice. 

For a brand new lineup, yesterday looked quite familiar: 

We score early and then go into hibernation. We had so many opportunities to break open the game, and we did nothing. Over the last 10 years, how often has that scenario played out?

5. Nice to see Luke Weaver throw a relatively quick eighth. (One walk.) Weaver remains a mystery, almost too good to be true. There were reports out of Tampa that his mph has dropped a couple ticks. He looked good yesterday. 

The Yankees really need a setup guy. They might even need a closer.

Unbottled, unbrewed and unbuttoned. I'll take it.  

Thursday, March 27, 2025


 

Big Game Today


 

An IIHIIFIIc tradition: "Goodbye Cruel World, It's Opening Day"

 




The gods place bets with loaded dice,
And all our earthly dreams betray,
But listen to one clown's advice,
Goodbye, cruel world; it’s opening day.

The politicians scrounge for power,
With consequences we shall pay.
But somewhere, it's our finest hour,
Goodbye, cruel world; it's opening day.

Our weary age is full of war,
The daily news brings dark dismay,
So surf the dreams worth living for,
Goodbye, cruel world; it’s opening day.


-- el duque, 2008 --

The 2025 IT IS HIGH Prediction Contest Scoreboard



                                 Wins          Judge HRs    Martian BA

Hammer of God         96                   65                  .320

Rufus T. Firefly          94                   50                  .280

Doug K                       93                   52                  .281

RtotheE                      93                   63                  .260 

Parson Tom                 92                   43                  .251

PgPick                         92                   57                  .255

Mattingly’s 

      Mustache               92                   50                   .293

Hinkey Haines              91                   50                  .261

Jaraxle                         91                   47                  .266

Local Bargain 

         Jerk                     91                   49                  .278

Gary Frenay                  90                   50                  .260

Bern Baby Bern            90                   49                  .248

JM                                 89                   45                  .233

Oliver Tiberius

    Cat                            89                   45                  .269

Vampifella                     88                   50                   .225

Coplius                          88                   54                   .270 

Dick Allen                      87                   56                   .310

Carl J Weitz                   87                   56                   .283

Alphonso                       87                   43                   .238 

Kevin                             87                  57                    .275

Ken of Brooklyn           86                   51                    .223

Ranger LP                      85                   45                   .218

Acrilly                            84                   48                   .227

Mildred Lopez               84                   43                   .251

BTR999                          84                   27                   .239

Platoni                           83                    53                  .250

Der Kaiser                      82                    38                  .247

Publius                           82                    41                  .221

Scottish 

     Yankee Fan               82                    31                  .228

Above Average                81                    46                  .256

Wezil1                           80                     42                  .262

Pocono Steve                 79                    46                  .269

Chaz                              79                   39                   .267

El Duque                        78                    60                   .232

13BIT                             75                    43                  .251

Stang                              73                    75                   .199

HoraceClarke66              66                    31                  .223

Predictions taken until Noon Thursday. 


Wednesday, March 26, 2025

Wells and Rice, with respects to Robert Frost


Some say the year will end with Wells,
Some say with Rice.
From what I’ve seen of raging hells,
I see a season cold as ice.

And if we lose in autumn twice,
I think I know enough of Hal
To say that, as a DH, Rice
Is not a go
And won't suffice.

Three Reasons Why The Yankees Are Better Than Last Year

In looking at the predictions for the season I couldn't help but notice that a lot of us are in the eighties in terms of wins. I don't understand the pessimism. Okay, actually I do, but that doesn't make it so. 

The Yankees have put together a solid team. Not a great one but they did do several things to improve on last years roster and, injuries non withstanding, they should be just fine. 

Reason One:  Fewer Meltdowns

The Yankees main problem, and the one that was exposed for all to see in the fifth inning of last year's World Series game five, was...  They meltdown. 

As great as Gerrit Cole is, he is one of the most emotionally fragile pitchers I have ever seen. 

His every start is filled with dread as fans and the players live in fear of "The Error" that will cause Mr. Angry Pouty Face to appear and flush it away. 

Add Rodon to this dynamic and almost two fifths of the starting rotation's games were played in a state of mental exhaustion. 

Players get tight. Volpe plays tight, especially in the later innings. Gleyber was just a Gleyber away from Gleyberizing both in the field and on the base paths. 

The Yankees were so meltdown prone they were AFRAID to play Jasson over a guy who couldn't hit a pinata at a four year old's birthday party, because an error in the field could and did spell doom. 

Sadly it was Judge. But once that ball dropped and Mr. Angry Pouty Face showed up, the game and the series was over. 

Replacing Cole with Fried will be a net positive. Not as good as having them both, but they aren't going to have them both, so I'd rather have Fried. 

Want proof?  

In one of Fried's starts this spring the Yankee infield, botched grounders, threw wild, and failed to make an easy inning ending DP on a ground ball, pretty much all in a row.  What did he do? He didn't whine, he didn't pout, he just got another ground ball. And then another ground ball. And then another ground ball. 

This had the effect of cooling everyone out. No explosion. No tension. No meltdown. 

Yes, they still have Rodon but I have to believe that it's going to be a calmer environment this year especially since... 

Reason Two: No Holmes

We all know why. (Cough. Thirteen. Blown. Saves.)  The Yankees have the lead. Could be a couple of runs. Time to RELAX and put the game to bed. But they can't. Couple of hits. Couple of walks. Volpe bounces one. Give up another hit. Gleyber Gleybers. Boom! Thirteen. Blown. Saves. 

Reason Three:  No Gleyber. 

Allow me to add to the above.  Gleyber fails to cut off the throw. Gleyber slow on the DP. Gleyber kills Yankee rally with bad baserunning etc. 

---

There are other reasons I believe that they are better this year but these three are huge. 

And for those who say the rotation is our doom, I would point out that Gil was great early but then hurt, and marginal upon return, and he will be back. The bullpen is better. Infield defense better. Judge back in right. Better CF as well. 

93 Wins. 

The 2025 Yankee batting order... Honestly, we've seen better and worse

 






Austin Wells C
Aaron Judge RF
Cody Bellinger CF
Paul Goldschmidt 1B
Jazz Chisholm 2B
Anthony Volpe SS
Ben Rice DH 
Jasson Dominguez LF
Oswaldo Cabrera 3B 
Carlos Rodon P

If you haven't done it yet, add your 2025 predictions in the comments.

Number of Yankee wins.
Number of Aaron Judge HRs.
Jasson Dominguez batting average.

Deadline: Noon Thursday.

May the best fan win



Tuesday, March 25, 2025

An Above Average Haiku Tuesday ~ The 25th Day, of the 3rd Month, in the 25th Year, Edition !

  Look into HIS eyes . . .    

  Hear his words, TRUST his message . . .  

  LOVE . . . BRIAN CA$HMAN !  



 

It's time to project our projections for 2025. Here are mine. Read them and weep


The IT IS HIGH 2025 PREDICTION CONTEST is now underway. 

Say your sooths, eject your projections, prognosticate your progs, and predict away!   

1. The number of Yankee regular season victories. 

2. The number of Aaron Judge HR. (1st tie-breaker)

3. The final batting average of Jasson Dominguez. (2nd tie-breaker.)

Post them in the comments before Thursday at noon. (Those of you who already have voted; you have until then to amend your predictions - but, please, don't drive me nuts.) 

Meanwhile, it's time for me to put up or shut up. Since I can't shut up, I must put up. And you must put up with me putting up. Ah, wordplay! It's like dining with M.C Escher. 

"You're right, M.C., I should never say never. I tell myself to never say never. It never works. I always end up saying never. I should never say always, but I never do. Whenever I say never, I always think, that’s it, never again! It always never works."

I could go on. (Escher would, forever.) Here are 10 Bold Timid Predictions for 2025.

1. The Yankees will finish fourth in the AL East.

Why do I feel this way? Boston is on the verge of one of its every-fifth-years uprisings.  Baltimore is coming of age. Tampa will play before sell-out crowds. That leaves Toronto, which will be gnarled up with the USA/Canada bullshit; the Jays will finish last, behind us. Yes, we will beat Toronto. Hooray. 

2. The Yankees will win 78 games.

Why do I feel this way? Depth. We have none. We enter 2025 with our utility man, Oswaldo Cabrera, playing 3B, and our Scranton call-up, Ben Rice, as DH. Our fifth starter is Carlos Carrasco. Why kid ourselves? The injuries won't suddenly cease. The next wave - and there will be one - will mean replacing starters with Triple A lug nuts. This current lineup might win 85 games. The replacement lineup will not be 
 a .500 team.

3. Aaron Judge will hit 60 HRs.

Why do I feel this way? Giancarlo Stanton is gone. If he returns in, say, July or August, it won't be for long. His absence will free up Judge to DH whenever necessary. I think he'll thrive in that role. Also, after mid-August, there won't be much to watch, aside from Judge chasing his own HR record. He will be our source of pride. When Met fans claim Juan Soto is better, we will shut their mouths with our bare hands.

4. The Martian will hit .232. 

Why do I feel this way? Dunno. But .232 is the exact point where you wonder if 30 HRs is worth 150 strikeouts. That's how Jasson Dominguez's rookie year will unfold. He can close his eyes and walk into 30 HRs, but the Ks will pile up. I think The Martian will have a fine career - at his peak, an all-star - but he will never be Mike Trout. I hope Yank fans can accept this. And God help JD if he starts slowly, because the crowds - rabid for hope - will start calling for Spencer Jones. We might end up crushing two prospects in one year.

5. Max Fried will win 18 games.

Why do I feel this way? He's a lot like Gerrit Cole. He's cagey. He's wily. He knows his craft. Between now and the end of his eight-year contract, he'll miss a season due to injuries. They all do. But this will be his best year with the Yankees. He will be one of our few sources of pride. And whenever he pitches, in the backs of our heads, we'll wonder: Where the fuck would we be without him?

6. Cody Bellinger and Paul Goldschmidt will hit - until they're hurt. 

Why do I feel this way? Well, why WOULDN'T I feel this way? Why would any self-respecting Yankee fan NOT expect them to go down? Seriously, when you ask these questions, do you know that you look like a fool? 

7. The depth - or lack of it - will kill us. 

Why do I feel this way?  Good grief, I already said this. Did you even read the top part of this post? And this is not a bold prediction. It's a diddly shit prediction. We all know the Yankees play well until the gonads tweak. That's where depth comes in. If we have a Cameron Maybin or Matt Carpenter, we make the playoffs. If we have, um, J.C. Escarra? - well - I dunno. 

8. The bullpen will be strong until Boone kills it.

Why do I feel this way?  Because of fucking history, that's why! Boone kills bullpens the way Elon Musk kills retirement plans. You think he'll suddenly change? Why would you feel this way? We all know what will happen. First to go will be Luke Weaver, last year's miracle baby. Boone will use him up like a car battery in a blizzard. Once he's gone, he'll move to the next pitcher, then the next, then the next. We're managed by Agatha Christie. 

9. Anthony Volpe will have a quietly successful season. 

Why do I feel this way? Fans wonder if he'll hit for power (20 HRs) or average (.255.) I say he'll do both. Trouble is, he won't be Bobby Witt Jr. He won't be Francisco Lindor. He might not be Jackson Holliday or Boston's looming stud. This is a world ruled by superhuman shortstops, and Volpe won't be one. I hope that doesn't destroy him.

10. You Know Who will hit well for the Mets - until he gets injured. Yes, the Yankee tweaks taint will follow Long Gone Juan. And when he is in the ice bath, that'll be a fuck of a lot of money circling the drain. Too much money for fans or Gammonites to accept. 

I honestly think he outsmarted himself by chasing every last thin dime. Met fans will cheer him - they just want us to grouse - but the rest of humanity will see through his wondrous smile. And when he goes down, good luck, Mets!

And good luck to you all. Now... put up or shut up. 

Monday, March 24, 2025

To understand Yankee history, we need Gordon Lightfoot

A devious friend (Met fan, of course) visited a nautical history museum recently and sent these phone pics. They tell a story I've never heard, a haunted legend of the Great Lakes.. the tale of the Henry Steinbrenner. 

Sherman, set the Wayback to spring of 1953...

Note: To my knowledge, nobody called her "Hank," or "The Yankee Clipper." Steinbrenner was a Clevelander with no affiliation to the Bronx. Nor was there ever a ship to be named "Hal." 


All four Henry Steinbrenners went down, in one way or another. But the end of the line came on May 11, 1953. 

The weather started getting rough, the tiny ship was tossed. If not for the courage of the fearless crew, the Henry would be lost. 


Facing 80-mph winds, with conditions deteriorating, the crew abandoned ship and climbed into life rafts. Many didn't make it.


For decades, nobody knew the wreck's location. It was believed to be somewhere off the coast of Michigan. 

In fact, according to my friend, the wreck was found on Oct. 31, 2024, in the fifth inning of game five. He added his comment to the exhibit.


The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down, of the big lake they call "Gitche Gumee." Superior, they said, never gives up her dead, when the gales of November come early.

On that note, tomorrow, we'll start taking predictions for the annual IT IS HIGH Yankee win-total for 2025 - our 'bragging rights" contest for fan supremacy. I believe we will add a physical prize, donated by commentator Carl J. Weitz. We're working on it. 

Along with the number of Yankee wins in 2025, this year's tie-breaker predictions will be: 

The number of HRs Aaron Judge hits. 

And the final batting average of "The Martian," Jasson Dominguez. 

Get out the windsock. Check your tea leaves. And, as a wizened cook surely said, when at 7 p.m., the main hatchway gave in: "Fellas, it's been good to know ya."

Final note: I guess something needs to be said. But I don't think there are words to describe our feelings over the death of Brett Gardner's son this weekend. Hearts broken.