You can't leave a bag of cocaine on the bar and expect it to go unused.
Thus, Joe Torre has one week to snort the best young arm in the Yankee system... or at least suck up a sizeable chunk... just in time for the playoffs.
The old rules, which said Joba Chamberlain had to sit one day for each inning pitched, ended Sunday. Thus, the new Joba Rules...
1. No entering game more than once. If removed from game, cannot return.
2. Pitch count is critical. Therefore, someone shall count every pitch.
3. If arm hurts, file complaints to Tanyon Sturtze.
4. "Quick! Warm up Scot Proc- I MEAN JOBA!"
5. Start touting the restorative life-benefits of Tommy John surgery. (Really! It's great! You come back stronger than ever!)
6. As long as we might win today's game, just throw. Hard.
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3 comments:
Quick, break out the T-shirt printing press.
"JABA: No Rules, Just Right"
Stand by a corner at the stadium, sell 'em for $5, run if you see a cop.
BBB
... and after printing the above, print out a new batch with:
"JOBA: No Rules, Just Right"
Then sell the first batch as a rare "error" version, upping the price to $10.
BBB
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