Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Pirate Fans React to Hinske Trade

A quiet and reserved response surfaced today from Pirates fans all over western Pennsylvania, as  the latest Pirate deal with the Yankees was announced.


For those of you still sleeping under that bridge, 32 year old, reserve bench player, Eric Hinske, was dealt to the Yankees for two 23 year-old prospects.

Hinske was known in Pittsburgh for striking out with the bases loaded ( " better than what Cano does for the Yankees with the bases full," giggled one Pirate loyalist ), eating double cheese, double mayo burgers in between innings, and losing interest in most games by the top of the third inning.

According to one fan, " I saw Hinske actually nod off while playing third base against the Braves, about a month ago.  Lucky for him, nothing came his way. Otherwise, he would have been traded to the Yankees a month ago," he laughed, spitting out his super-sized soda.

A beautiful young woman, attired in a Roberto Clemente jersey, added:  " It's almost like the Yankees have a death wish.  Don't they know we are just dealing losers to them? 

We are trading them players who are burned out, who no one else would take for a fee, and who we know are damaged in some material way. And the Yankees keep sending us young prospects.  Are they total idiots? "

"I mean, do the Yankees have a clue?  Can you imagine,for example, drinking sewage from a well one day, and then coming back to the same well for more? 

 Don't they do any homework?  Don't they see what Boston got, what the Braves got, and what they got?

Have they no memory?  No awareness at all?

No wonder they don't win.


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