Forget PEDs and steroids. Know why the Yanks and Redsocks play in the AL post-season so regularly? Whenever the fates conspire against them, they sip liberally from their secret restorative energy-broth elixer:The home and away series against Balt-no-more.
The O's... baseball's most aptly nicknamed team.
Thirteen years in the crapper.
Not since 1997 has the Crabcake City witnessed a playoff game. It won't this year. Thirteen years. The Britney Spears family procreates in less time. Jeffrey Maier, the kid who caught the ball in rightfield over Tony Tarasco in 1996, will soon be getting letters from AARP. Good grief, last time Baltimore was any good, the secondbaseman was Jerry Hairston SENIOR.
Thirteen years in the Burger King dumpster.
They had the first pick in a draft. They chose Ben McDonald.
Another time, they drafted third. They bypassed Derek Jeter.
They made irrelevant the entire careers of Brady Anderson and Brian Roberts. (Or is it Brian Anderson and Brady Roberts? Fukkit, because they played for Baltimore, who cares!)
They enabled Sidney Ponson to play baseball. They served as tombs for Jeff Conine, Javy Lopez, Melvin Mora and now Miguel Tejada.
Thirteen years in the Guatemalan sinkhole.
Of course, we crapped pineapples for 13 big ones, between 1981 and 1995, including one season scotched by a strike. It took Stick Michaels and Bob Watson to restore sanity and save the life legacy of George Steinbrenner.
But who would have thought Peter Angelos -- a sneaky lawyer -- could be more incompetent than George? Frankly, I feared Angelos at the start. I figured a rich lawyer had to be smart. (Then again, I also figured a guy who married into the Steinbrenners named Swindall could make a great sneaky owner, but - hey - I was wrong.)
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1 comment:
Thank you so much for the laughs.
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