Yet Again, Yanks Get Beat By Opponents' Only Real Hitter

 

Sorry, but I just can't get over this one. 

Sure, last night your New York Yankees got worked over good by both the arbiters and Brian Cashman's Amazing Legacy of Trades, the gifts that never stop giving.

Pick up Sonny Gray over Justin Verlander? Then deal Gray for (almost) literally nothing?

But you and I, we've been through that, as the poet wrote, and even with those formidable hurdles to leap, the Yanks should've pulled out last night's game.

It all started to go bad when whatever intern down in the MLB video review booth spilled the tahini sauce for his falafel all over his lap, and inexplicably called a Twin safe at first. Or whatever happened.

Unlike Gerrit "the Wilting Violet" Cole, the Yankee hurler in the box at the moment, Wandy Peralta of all people, only got his dander up and fanned the next Minnesotan with gusto.

Which led Aaron Boone to pull him. And bring in Greg Weissert to pitch to Carlos Correa, The Man Who Gave Us Muscles Rortvedt.

This alone had looming disaster written all over it, even if Michael Kay did assure us that Weissert was "the man with the magic slider."

What Weissert really was and is, of course, is the man with the 7.36 ERA, a bundle of rookie nerves who looks like someone from a Sunday beer league who bopped the real Weissert on the head on his way in from Scranton, and took his place.  

(Hmm, maybe the next Jim Carey movie??)

In any case, the Man with the Magic Slider came in, throwing each pitch with his deliberate, double-tap front step, until Correa, the only real bat in the Twins' lineup, got into the rhythm like a man in an Arthur Murray dance class, and lined that magic stuff over the left field wall.

You could see it coming. ANYBODY with any experience watching the game could see it coming.

Except, of course, for our manager, Aaron Boone, who often acts like he just wandered into a baseball stadium for the first time, after a lifetime spent in association football.

Once again, the Yankees got beat by the best hitter—really, the only hitter—in the other team's lineup. Shohei Ohtani in LA, Carlos Correa back in New York. And on and on.

Ma Boone seems like a nice guy, and it will be very unfair for him to take the only fall for this Yankees team's disastrous collapse. Cashman's head should roll, too, and HAL should be made to swallow however much cryptocurrency it takes to unload Giancarlo, etc.

But boy, even above and beyond everything put in his path by his owner and GM, Aaron Boone is the worst Yankees manager I've ever seen. Maybe the worst ever.

I can't say that for sure. There was Johnny Keane, and someone named "Fighting Harry" Wolverton whose Yankees fought enough to finish dead last. The Yanks even made Hal Chase, a man notorious for betting against his own team, manager for a year.

So maybe he's not the worst ever.

But he ain't good.