The Yankees - winners of 27 world championships, including as recently as 2009! - look to be almost unstoppable in 2026, according to the latest ESPN Power Rankings!
Not only that, but in today's internet write-up, the Power Rankers say - get this, critics and nonbelievers: "There is an argument to rank the Yankees first, overall!"
Wow! And I mean this, sincerely: Holy crap! Plus, with an argument to be first? Pinch me. I'm getting all choky here. I didn't expect this. I made some notes, and now I can't find them. Where was I? Oh, I told myself I wouldn't cry. Now, tears streaming. OVER THE MOON! THAT'S WHERE I AM! Where do I start? Fourth? Do you know how many teams out there would give their left billiard to rank fourth? And that's us! Fourth. Right after third.
Take a bow, Mr. Cashman - and Mr. Hal, and Mr. Randy, and Mr. Boone, and all the interns, secretaries, wonks and A.I. algorithms that have accomplished this magnificent feat! Pass the word, people: The Yankees are back! And to our amigos in the far south... Numero quatro, baby!
Says the Power Rankings: The Yankees - with Cam Schlittler, Luis Gil, Will Warren, Gerrit Cole, Max Fried, Carlos Rodon and the handful of young arms who will rise up from the farm system - they're always "growing" prospects; that's why it's called a "farm" system - "might" have the best rotation in baseball!
Wow! Excuse me. Gotta catch my breath. This is wild. This is Sydney Sweeney Level, in-fucking-credible, Big News, with a capital B.N. The Yankees might have the best rotation in baseball! Who knew? Of course, there are concerns. There are always concerns, and we're not afraid to mention them. Anthony Volpe had an "off" year. Ryan McMahon didn't hit that well. And the bullpen, which - yes, it would be the first to tell you that it had problems - but, hey! FOURTH!
Those booms you're hearing? That's me, popping the buttons on my britches! They're flying off with newfound Yankee pride!
The Yankees are back, everybody! Fourth!
And soon, after some Cashman trades, I think I'm smelling THIRD!
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10 comments:
Let's see, fourth....that would mean we get into the postseason, get through the division series, and then lose the ALCS.
Gee. Didn't we do that this year?
At least we might have an interesting rotation. Maybe.
Sports reporting was always less news and journalism than hard news. Still, the opinions were interesting. Now, it's all highly purified horse shit, fake news, infotainment, regurgitated cattle feed, T&A, toxic masculinity, microphone fellatio and generalized dung, hogwash and dill weed pudding. Fuck them all.
I'm applying for my season tickets today.
Where?
For What ?
Why ?
Yesterday, Daylight Savings reminded me that :
It's astounding
Time is fleeting
Madness takes its toll
But listen closely
Not for very much longer
We’ve got to
KEEP CONTROL !
My local curling league. Great excuse to drink.
Ooh ooh ooh I'll never understand
Ooh ooh ooh complete control - lemme see your other hand!
All over the news spread fast
They're dirty, they're filthy
They ain't gonna last!
This is Joe Public speaking
I'm controlled in the body, controlled in the mind
Total
C-o-n control - that means you!
Does anybody over the age of 30 still watch ESPN?
Does anyone under 30?
Hard ons galore!
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