Saturday, May 16, 2026

Sgt. Elias: "You're an asshole, Boone."


 He platooned the Martian.

He platooned Rice.

He platooned Oswaldo.

He platooned Stanton.

He platooned Bellinger.

He platooned Goldie.

But no matter how bad he's hitting, he never, ever, ever platoons Volpe. And pinch hit for him, if I rememer correctly, once.

Boone is an idiot.

Platooning is largely a sham.

So is Cashman.

10 comments:

AboveAverage said...

He should be Oliver Stone'd

BTR999 said...

Fudd returns

Prior to tonight’s game, the Yankees made the following roster moves:
• Placed LHP Max Fried on the 15-day injured list (retroactive to 5/14) with a left elbow bone bruise.
• Recalled RHP Elmer Rodríguez (#71) from Triple-A Scranton/Wilkes-Barre.

The Hammer of God said...

Fucking Boone left Cam Schlittler in there too long last night and damn near blew the game.

The Hammer of God said...

Has anyone ever heard of an elbow bone bruise from throwing the ball? They said his bones are colliding together when he throws. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't there a medical term for that called "arthritis"? They're saying they dodged the worst. I don't know about that. This sounds really bad. He might be done. He might have to hang it up for good.

The Hammer of God said...

Once again, this is why they needed more depth at starting pitching. Needed at least one more starter, free agent or via trade. Fuck Cashman, what an asshole.

The Hammer of God said...

Rodon pitching tonite. I think our Battlin' Bronx Bastards get bombed.

JM said...

Get yer walks here! Plenty of walks for everybody!

13bit said...

As I pointed out the other day, there are certain Yankee people whose names are anagrams.

Bednar = Brenda
Rodon = Donor
Cashman - Can Hams
Randy Levine = Lavender Yin
Schlittler - Strict Hell
Anthony Volpe - Venal Typhoon
Armed Rosario = Radio Roamers
Bellinger = Rebelling
Oswaldo Cabrera seems to break the Internet Anagram Server - no joke - although if you wait long enough, one of the things it delivers is "Aboard Earls Cow" Take that any way you want to.
Trent Grisham is a good one, coming in - among others - at
German Thirst
Garment Shirt
Smarter Night
Shattering Mr
Smarten Girth
Grants Hermit
Rehang Tits Mr
Rating The Mrs
and COUNTLESS others.

I'll stop there, but I won't stop thinking about it.
I can never hear "Bednar" again, though, without thinking "Brenda." There goes Brenda....

13bit said...

Because - when you're a longtime Yankee fan - the last 15 to 20 years have given me WAY too much time to think about stupid shit.

TheWinWarblist said...

Cam StrictHell !!