Dr. Tadeusz Kawecki, an evolutionary biologist at the University of Fribourg, and like-minded scientists (seated on the left), have recently released a study to MLB which attempts to explain why baseball fans learn, and why the the learning abilities of fans of certain teams have evolved more slowly than others.
" Learning is widespread in the animal kingdom. Even the microscopic vinegar worm, Caenorhadits elegans, can learn despite having just 302 neurons," the report states.
Similarly, learning is endemic amongst baseball fans. The study first examined the bottom of the food chain.
"Contrary to popular opinion, Red Sox fans are not just little robots doing everything by instinct," the report boldly advises on page 23.
"The DNA of a typical Red Sox fanatic, for example, clearly proved that they can learn to associate certain odors with food."
In a second set of experiments, the report concludes that young male Red Sox fans waste a lot of time trying to court unreceptive females.
" It takes time to learn the signs of a receptive fly. "
You can look it up.
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