To Commemorate Old timers Day, An Excerpt From The Book Of Waste

Good Morning.

I was born just after the dinosaurs died out in Iowa, about 300 years ago according to Iowa's new soon to be first Lady, Michelle Bachman.

I can't hit or run.

If balls are hit to me I can still catch them.

My arm is sore, my calf hurts, and I need Tommy John surgery in my elbow and knees.

I did hit a home run once, which IIH,IIF,IIc still honors with a sidebar labeled, " Making my bones."

It should be amended to read, " Making a bone once."

I am hiding in the dugout.

I think I have been forgotten, which would be best.

I get paid a lot more than any of you do for what I once did.

Now, I do nothing, contribute nothing, think of nothing, and still get paid.

A lot.

Do you all love me?