Ten Quatloos for the Newcomer? Have the Yankees turned chinzy?

From the realm of Pure Speculation, which is where most sportswriters live these days, comes the intuitive sense - translated into rumor and then distilled down to raw, felony-grade conventional wisdom - that the Yankees secretly punted yesterday in the great silent canasta tournament being played for the new Japanese pitching sensation, Yu Darvish.

Is it true? Who knows? But I'm starting to speculate that the Steinbrothers have decided they do not want to be their dad - a decision with many good and bad ramifications.

I'm all for it, if it means we won't trade any more young Mark Melancons for those aging Ingrid Bergmans, because we always seem to have enough of them already, thank you. But it frightens me to think the Yankees - the mighty, high-spending team that values winning more that life itself - suddenly are collecting bottle deposits to fix that shower that drips. We are charging fans $500 a seat. That money needs to win games, fix drug tests and payoff local politicians - not to finance new boats for the Steinboys.

Listen: In 2009, the Yankees led the nation - briefly albeit - out of recesssion. We spent the house for CC Sabathia, Mark Teixiera and AJ Burnett. And it worked. We won the World Series. America seemed to rebound. But ever since, the Little Steins have pinched their nickels with the tenacity of scorpions squeezing the heads off red ants. Moreover, some trogdolytes in the Yankiverse now seem bent on judging players by the money they're paid - a dangerous, Kansas City-like mentality. Yesterday, I read some fool who wanted to compare AJ Burnett to Ed Whitson, as the worst free agent signing in our history. Folks, that is absolutely insane. We are starting to resemble the Christine O'Donnell wing of the Tea Party. Has Lyndon Larouche resurfaced to run Yankee blogs?

Sorry. Off topic there. But mark these words: The Redsocks will not stand pat. By spring, they will be vastly improved, and as much as we want to laugh at them now, they missed by an inch last year. They get to make deals that we cannot. Most GMs in baseball will only trade with the Yankees if it's a slam dunk. And those trade ideas blathered by the AJ-Burnett-is-Ed Whitson voices? You know... Nick Swisher and so-and-so for King Felix? They're from that other realm - Planet Speculation.

Yu Darvish would come to us with no cost, aside from money. Last time I looked, we have a shitload. Steinboys, you're charging $500 for a seat. You owe us more than Bartolo Colon and clam dip.