Monday, September 9, 2019

Tauchman is gone

Calf strain, 6 to 8 weeks.

Kay is all upset because "Do you really want Clint Frazier defensively in left field?"

Yes. Yes, Fatboy, I do.

59 comments:

Alphonso said...

No JM, you don't.

Let Maybin play.

JM said...

Rufus, I was too drunk to see you on the TV box. I mean, I probably saw you but didn't remember it was you and don't remember if I did see you.

I need a drink.

JM said...

Maybin can't hit with that wrist. Besides, Alphonso, I've been saying for months that left is Frazier's field and Boone should never play him in right, which he did over and over until he cracked.

He played left the other day and was fine. Also nailed a guy at the plate. His defense is easily as good as Stanton's, who Kay wants back to play left. That makes no sense to me.

Alphonso said...

Wait a minute JM, we should drink together. Then, we could figure it all out. Crown Royal? Gentleman jack?

I saw the Frazier game where he played LF and threw the dude out on a rope. I also saw him take a poor angle to that ball he missed at the wall, and nearly re-concussed himself.

I agree that LF is his place. I agree that Stanton should remain inactive.

And I gather that Maybin's wrist is worse than I thought.

Losing Mike is a big deal; he hit; he played extraordinary defense, he had long at bats, and he could run. What a shame.

JM said...

Yep. This is a big loss. I'll go for a Templeton, or even Old Overholt. But I may be fine with Crown Royal. I can't recall the last time I tried it. Which means if I did try it, I liked it a lot.

If Stanton doesn't make it back, we don't have much choice. Frazier or Wade. Offense or defense.

Sophie's choice.

13bit said...

We don't want Stanton back.

JM said...

No, we don't.

Can Torres play left?

Rufus T. Firefly said...

JM,

You were not drunker than me.

As for the whiskey tasting, I'd recommend including Bulleit Rye and Blanton's bourbon. They are very tasty options, even if you prefer the others.

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

I just checked the line up. Maybin is in left. Fucking cross burning gingerists.

JM said...

Incredible.

Rufus, I know Bulleit intimately. Blanton's, no.

I'm also very well acquainted with Michter's, Rittenhouse, Redemption, and Woodford. All fine people.

Leinstery said...

I don't want to see Frazier with a glove

JM said...

Is Stanton better?

I don't remember a lot of complaints when Frazier was playing earlier in the year until that terrible game on ESPN. Maybe I've forgotten.

And he's spent time working on his defense. So what if he's not a Gold Glove, he's serviceable. And he can hit. A lot.

Who was the guy we had 20 years ago, played right when he played, nowhere near a great fielder, but hit and somehow we won a ton? And late career Beltran? Wasn't he a minus in defense? I have a vague memory... could be wrong.

JM said...

Not talking about Paulie, someone else.

Years of drinking will do this to you, kids. Be forewarned.

TheWinWarblist said...

Suzyn just said it was a tear in the calf muscle. Not just a strain. A fucking tear. He was running around in the outfield and he tore his calf?? What are they juicing with now? Fuming sulphuric acid??



Fuck you Hal.

JM said...

John and Suzyn were just discussing left field. Maybin and Wade. Stanton, to keep Encarnacion as DH, with Maybin in for defense late.

Frazier's name wasn't even mentioned. A starting outfielder earlier this year, now a benchwarmer. If he's lucky.

Why the fuck didn't they just trade the poor guy? This is torture. If he isn't in the conversation at this point, he never will be.

13bit said...

Can we just say that the "tear in the muscle" thing is fake news and dial it back a bit? I'm sure he's doing laps right now. Nothing to see here. Move along...

JM said...

And Winnie... exactly. Wtf is going on with these guys? I used to deliver furniture and paint houses when I was a youngster. Can you imagine the injuries these guys would have doing that? They tear, pull, and destroy muscles by jigging in the outfield or swinging a bat. How is that even possible?

JM said...

Jogging

HoraceClarke66 said...

I think you're thinking of Abreu. Who everybody got mad at because he didn't run into walls a lot. All he had instead was near-HOF career.

JM said...

I don't think it was him. Ah, well.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

JM,

That not-Paulie guy may have been good, but he definitely wasn't clutch. Especially in the fall months. Because there is no such thing as clutch.

Also, try Blanton's sometime. Has a horse stopper. Unfortunately, the Chinese have discovered it, so the price is higher than it used to be.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Suzyn and Joe Castiglione are pretty good.

And did you know the Hebrew Home is just like a college campus? Without the chemo.

Castiglione is the *only* Carmine announcer that I will listen to. Just plays it straight, even though you know he is rooting for his team.

TheWinWarblist said...

The Master is doing an inning with the Ketchups radio team, and the Ketchups' sad, sad hollow broadcaster is with Suzyn!? What sort of unholy broadcast swapping is going on!? What's next a key party between NESN and YES!? Oh gawd! Who would get O'Neill???



Fuck you Hal.

JM said...

Romie my homie?

TheWinWarblist said...

Romiy? My homey?

...

What the unholy Hebrew Home John? What the fuck??



Fuck you Hal?

JM said...

Indian Point is like a college campus. But with radiation.

TheWinWarblist said...

How is radiation not a welcome part of any college campus? I remember warming my hands over the glowing corium lava pool at homecoming! Such excitement. I miss my fingers, but still!



O' fuck you Hallllll !!

Mike Fan Cessa said...

Maple H. Newhart says "G...goodbye".

Anonymous said...

IT IS REALLY OUTRAGEOUS THE WAY THE YANKEE BRASS IS TREATING FRAZIER.

I MEAN, HE LITERALLY WAS HELPING US WIN GAMES WITH HIS CLUTCH HITS, AND HUSTLE.

THEN HE HAD THE BOSTON GAME WITH THE ERRORS ON NATIONAL TV, AND I GUESS, THE FINAL STRAW, THE INTERVIEW STARE DOWN WITH THE REPORTER.

WE SURE KNOW HOW TO MENTALLY CRUSH OUR OWN PROSPECTS.

....BUT THE REAL TRAGEDY HERE IS WE CAN REALLY USE HIS BAT FROM HERE ON IN, INCLUDING THE PLAYOFFS, AND I DON'T THINK WE ARE EVEN GOING TO CARRY HIM ON THE ROSTER.

I RATHER HAVE HIS BAT MORE THAN STANTON'S ANY DAY OF THE WEEK COME PLAYOFF TIME.

ONE WILL AT LEAST MAKE CONTACT IN A BIG SPOT, THE OTHER WON'T, AND THEY'RE BOTH SHITTY FIELDERS.

FROM HERE ON IN, GIVE ME CLINT, NOT STANTON.

Austria's Only Baseball Fan said...

Wait… wait a minute. My English is pretty good, but I did just understand that Tauchmann will be out for six to eight seeks, but that Sabathia will start in Detroit in a few days? PLEASE tell me I misunderstood this!

JM said...

Nein. You heard correct.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Winnie,

Don't dis Castiglione. Would you rather father of the year RemyMartin?

I actually think Castiglione is a pretty dang good announcer.

As for radiation, I prefer direct gamma or the slowly emitting of old friend Cobalt60.

JM,

Before Friday's game, sat at the Cask 'n Flagon (aka toy 'r us for racist townie assholes except when the Yankees are in town) next to two guys from Peekskill. They didn't have any *visible* extra appendages.

Don't forget, I used to work on nuclear reactors. When I drank a LOT more.

John and Suzyn are now advocating for CC in the bullpen. No mention of whether he will be the designated "hitter".

JM said...

The Cardinal's Appeal allows the Church in New York to do the work of Jesus.

I thought Montero was out of baseball?

JM said...

Rufus, nuclear power is actually great. No carbon emissions, better air quality, energy independence. But when something goes wrong, holy crap, does it go wrong.

Gio Urshela the most happy fella!

JM said...

Besides, A-Rod parked a lot of A-bombs, and no bad effects.

TheWinWarblist said...

Castiglione could be a giant of the field and still not be worthy of sniffing The Master's farts!! UNWORTHY!!! UNWORTHY!!!



FYH!!!

JM said...

The ball is juiced and the seams are lower this year. So these borderline players genius Cashman found who are hitting homers like crazy...you think they do this again if MLB gets the balls back to normal? You think the Twins hit 280 homers next year?

If the ball goes back to normal, do these guys go back too? Boot, Urshela, Ford, Tauchman, Maybin... how many other players and teams come back to earth?

Just saying. And do pitchers like Tanaka immediately improve?

JM said...

Voit, not Boot

Rufus T. Firefly said...

JM,

Loved working on submarines. Met a lot of great people doing it and your tax dollars put me up in Honolulu for a year. It should be the template for electricity here (like in France), but competition with the design companies make each unit a unique design. STUPID, stupid, stupid. The navy has high skool gradumerates operating them. They can do it because they have a standard design, standard training, SOPs, etc., etc. Sort of the Southwest Airlines for nukes. I have purchase two houses within the evacuation zone of power plants (Rowe and Seabrook). I fear traffic more than them.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Winnie,

As someone who is FORCED to listen to ketchup announcers, Castiglione is by far the best of the lot.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

JM,

The baseball suits suck for making adapting to a changing ball -- A FUCKING CHANGING BALL FOR CHRIST'S SAKE -- part of the equation. Makes me want to drop a little polonium into their morning latte's.

TheWinWarblist said...

I'm getting a bit over-excited. And WHY SHOULDN'T I BE!?!?! AUSTIN ROMINE IS HITTING .275 RIGHT NOW! HE SHOULD KISS THOSE SUPER ROUNDLOWSEAMEDBASEBALLSFULLONTHELIPSWHATISGOINGONWHAWHAWHHHYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay. Okay...


...

...

Fuck you Hal? Yes? Yes. Fuck you Hal.

TheWinWarblist said...

UNWORTHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JM said...

Winnie, cut back on the meth. It'll kill ya.

And Romine. Add him to the list of suddenly terrific hitters.

TheWinWarblist said...

Meth is like mother's milk to some. Let it flow like cheap wine at a Knights of Columbus cook out!



Fuck you Hal.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Does anyone else think that Maybin looks like Boom Boom Washington?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_Hilton-Jacobs#/media/File:Welcome_Back_Kotter_Lawrence_Hilton-Jacobs_1976.jpg

JM said...

THAT'S who it is, Rufus! I knew he looked like somebody, but I couldn't figure out who.

Boom Boom Maybin.

JM said...

Cora and his stupid bullpen.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Na-na-naaahh nah

Hey, Hey, Hey.

JM said...

Socks, what, 18 and a half out?

Lololololololololol

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Little noticed, as the most happy fella reminded us, the big maple has strung together a few good starts.

13bit said...

Boston, eat shit and die.

I know, this means nothing in the grand scheme of things. I'm holding my balls in check until the last out of the World Series, IF we make it that far, but this is a good night.

Bend over and take it like a man, Boston.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

"Boston, eat shit and die."

That needs a 'motherfuckers' after it. As in:


Boston, eat shit and die, motherfuckers!

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Suzyn outed Castiglione as a former Yankees fan. I liked that :)

13bit said...

Rufus, I will accept your friendly amendment.

ranger_lp said...

Put a fork in them....

Anonymous said...

JM,

Back to "the guy we had 20 years ago, played right when he played, nowhere near a great fielder, but hit and somehow we won a ton" -- was it Shane Spencer? Or, if it was 15 years ago, it was Sheffield.

Anonymous said...

Or was it Glenallen Hill or Karim Garcia?

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