If there were ever a "Huh? Whatever... " Yankee pre-Christmas acquisition, Goldschmidt brings the milk and cookies. Welcome to the Bronx Boredom, everyone...
Right now, I plan to spend March reading comic books on the can. Unless The Martian goes crazy in spring training, there will be little reason for excitement. The Yanks will field a team of players in various stages of career decline, with sharply defined ceilings and the ever-persistent auras of twilight.
Here are 10 reasons why we should not rejoice, recoil, resist, resign, retire, reawaken or re-avow... Ten Reasons Not to Give a Crap.
1. No matter how bad Goldschmidt is, he can't be worse than what the Yankees received last year from the black hole that was first base. Overall, Yank 1Bs hit .216 with 16 HRs - some of the worst production in franchise history. You have to go back to the dark days of John Mayberry (8 HR, .209 in 1982.) Beat that, Mr. Gold.
2. Well, he might not. Goldie is coming off his worst season, ever. He hit .246 with 22 HRs. Damn. I feel like I'm strapped into a moving conveyor belt, with a laser ready to split me down the middle.
"Do you expect me to cheer, Goldswinger?"
"No, Mr. Fan. I expect you to die."
3. He's 37, turns 38 in September. I'm sorry, but there is no other way to paint this: At 37, not many players get better.
4. He's cagy, wise and, apparently, a good-hearted clubhouse presence, loved by all - flushes toilets, doesn't hog the soap dish, remembers birthdays... he can turn the world on with his smile, he can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile...
5. We'll only have him for one year. If he somehow has another MVP season, the Mets will sign him.
6. Supposedly, he still flashes a solid glove. I think the Yankees plan to market the 2025 team as a "Return to Pitching and Defense." Fine, if they mean it. A good glove at 1B can save an infield. On this, Goldschmidt should deliver.
7. He's RH, which means a possible, eventual, platoon with Ben Rice. I don't see him as Wally Pipp. The Yankees have no 1B on the farms, busting fences. Maybe somebody will emerge, but right now, it's not as if Goldschmidt is holding the slot for the next Don Mattingly.
8. There is talk that Nolan Arenado, Goldschmidt's close friend, will waive his no-trade clause with the Cardinals, allowing the Yankees to acquire him. Wow. I hadn't dreamed of recreating the legendary Cards' infield of '23. (Fifth in the NL Central!) Does anyone in the Yankiverse want this?
9. Whatever happens, Goldschmidt will not generate long term hope. He's a one-year rental, and - with all due respect - he conjures visions of Troy Tulowitski and Kevin Youkilis. Over the years, Yank fans have seen our share of great players in their final incarnations. I mean, does anyone here NOT expect to end up with Mike Trout, say, two broken years from now?
10. He knows what he's getting into. Goldschmidt is no fool. He used to be certifiably great, and he must have often wondered what it would be like to play in NY, to be feted nightly by the Bleacher Creature rollcall. Well, he's gonna find out. He must understand that NYC fan-support is not automatic. Some very good players ended up with very bad final acts in NY. (See Mayberry, John.) I'm sure he'll give us everything he's got. It's just - you know - 37.
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12 comments:
We do have a kid in the minors who plays first and hit very well last year. Name of Rumfield. Goldie is an obvious stopgap, although who comes next is beyond me. Even Rumfield played third, I think, until pretty recently. But whatever.
So what's going on with Rizzo? Is he retiring? The last couple of years have been really unkind to him (along with the Yankees, who played him when he had a concussion).
The Yankees better be all about pitching and defense, because their batters have barely a 1-in-4 chance of getting on base.
The Yankees lineup might set a record for aggregate strikeouts as 2/3 of their newly constructed lineup strike out considerably higher than the MLB whiff average . Get ready to see many all stikeout innings.
Hopefully, Goldy will emulate his former Cardinal teammate, Matt Carpenter, and hit over .300 with a sizeable amount of HR.
As of know, The Riz is a free agent. No takers yet.
I immediately thought of Youkilis when I heard of the signing. Youkilis, Mayberry, Tulo, Vernon Wells, the list of washed up stars goes on and on, with the same result. My crystal ball says Goldie has minimal impact for a month, then spends the rest of the year on the IL. Optimism is not exactly my strong suit.
Is Goldschmidt on the Ellsbury List yet?
Goldschmidt posted a below average OPS+ last year for the first time in his career. He will not be better. He will be worse. Probably much worse. That includes his supposedly great fielding. They could have signed Keith Fucking Hernandez. At least Hernandez is left handed.
He is "Over The Hill" X 10.
Thank you, Duque.
This is a bad signing. Even for one year. I'd rather have Rizzo back.
I've always had Rizzo's back......
I can lend it to you if you want, JM. And don't worry about shipping costs. I'll cover first . . . . . (class mail)
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