The three most terrifying words in the Yankiverse are once again being uttered: "Cashman is talking."

Last night, Brian Cashman did his annual sleepout for Covenant House, a shelter for NYC homeless youth - (a worthy cause, donate here) - which always lures Gammonites like peanut butter on a mousetrap. The event regularly assures terrifies Yank fans, with Cashman suggesting that all is collaping hunky dory, and everything is going straight to Hell according to plan. For example...

* The decision to give Trent Grishman a $22 million one-year qualifying offer, which Grish quickly snatched-up and devoured - was actually Cashman's hope, sorta like how Trump secretly wanted to wallpaper Congress with Epstein's babysitter list. Says Cashman, the Yankees have eliminated their void in CF, and now can turn to signing Cody Bellinger and/or Kyle Tucker. 

Yeah, right. What a crock. We all know Owner Hal's financial plans will be severely compromised by Grisham's decision, and that another expensive outfielder looks extremely unlikely. But at least for one night, in the good graces of charity, let's pretend we're on the right track. Cashman says he is "talking" to agents. Woopie...

* The Yankees supposedly have an outside shot at trading for Tarik Skubal, whom the Tigers might trade this winter, rather than eventually deal with Scott Boras and a billion dollar contract. The most likely suitors - according to Jim Bowden of The Athletic - include the Dodgers, Mets, Mariners, Redsocks and - gulp - Yankees. 

Bowden suggests Cashman could offer a package of Spencer Jones, Will Warren, Carlos Lagrange and Bryce Cunningham, two minor league arms who do not rhyme with "Hitler." I wonder about that. Seems to me that Detroit would want far more than Will Warren and a basket of fries, and those competing teams all have far more trade chips.  

Also, there is the long term question. Skubal is a West Coast boy - born in California, schooled in Arizona, college in Seattle - and if the Yankees did somehow outbid everyone in a trade package, they would then face another Juan Soto season - that is, a star in his walk year, where every game is processed through the prism of his impending free agency. Honestly, I hope we avoid another Soto. Yankee fans gave that asshole their unbridled love, and he pissed on it for a luxury box. Never again.  

One other aspect of Bowden's speculative story rouses this old fern. He suggests that Jones is more highly coveted than we may be thinking. The crowd in this dive bar, which includes me, has a tendency to obsess over strikeouts, which are Jones' weakness. Bowden calls him "an enticing blend of power and speed," as evidenced by 35 HRs and 29 SBs last year. He's also described as a better-than-average defensive corner OF.  

So, here's one last skinny on Cashman. What if Jones goes somewhere and becomes a superstar? What if Cashman trades away - gulp - the next Aaron Judge? That would become his legacy, and it would overwhelm a hundred nights of sleeping on the sidewalk. Yeah, it's a longshot. But I don't think Cashman dares pull the trigger. And, honestly, I hope he doesn't.