Heller Hits Apple Tonight

Jane "Best Seller" Heller signs copies of her steamy, X-rated, kiss-and-tell blockbuster book, "Confessions of a She-Fan" this evening at Stan's Bar, across from the old Yankee Stadium.

Starts at 5:30 p.m. Good book. Good writer. Good beer.

NOTE ADDED BONUS: Outside chance that Alphonso, the world's most pessimistic Yankee fan, shows up to tell everybody why we'll lose to Washington tonight. If it happens, it would be the most cataclysmic encounter since Rick Moranis, possessed by Zule, met the Gatekeeper in the first Ghostbusters romp. Prepare to be slimed.