Saturday Off-Topic Yankeetorial -- The NBA has performed a miracle: For first time in U.S. history, the nation is rooting for a Dallas team

Saddle up the channel-changer, cowpokes! Something's happening behind the shed, and America is grinning like a horse doctor with his arm up a cow!

Behind that big white foreigner with the broken finger, the Dallas Whatevers have captured the U.S. sports intelligensia like no Kennedy-killing city has done since -- well -- they started drilling for oil.

From coast to coast, in the city and on the farm, from the "little bit country" to the "little bit rock'n'roll," fans are locked in on the NBA championship series, which I believe started last week - check your local listings!

Yep, it pits Dallas -- the folks who shot JFK and JR -- featuring the big white center, who may or may not speak English, against -- altogether now: booooo -- the Miami team of 7-foot gazillionaires who disrespected the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame to play for a city whose doddering voters couldn't even decipher the 2000 Presidential ballots, and who now scooter around assisted-living golf courses, talking to the painted coconuts they believe are their ex-husbands.

This follows the recent NBA re-enactment of the Texas/Oklahoma rivalry, with players from everywhere in the world except Texas and Oklahoma -- "playing their hearts out" for that Longhorn/Sooner regional pride.

Yep, gather 'round chitlns, it's the NBA playoffs, with TV announcers whose names have temporarily escaped me -- Bill Russell, maybe? -- and famous great players. Hey, is that Bob Lilly?  No matter. America loves Dallas. Didja think you'd live to see it?