Monday, March 24, 2008

Questions for Cash

Honest Abe at the LoHud is taking questions for an online tribunal featuring Brian Cashman.

Here's a few:

1. When you tell a guy he’s been traded to, say, Kansas City, do you ever crack a little joke, like saying, “Hey, guess who’s in store for some great Omaha steak!”

2. Seriously, did you let Doug Menk****ch walk simply because nobody could spell his name?

3. Before you sign a free agent, to make sure he’s well grounded, do you ever try to seduce his wife?

4. Which is stupider, calling him "Jeet" or “Cappy?”

5. Based on your experience, what player is most likely to fall for old the phone call joke and yell out, “JACK MEOFF?”

6. Do you have any recordings of George ranting into your answering machine?

7. After A-Rod ditched Scott Boras, did you have an office party?

8. Do you have a fantasy baseball team?

9. Third inning, April 13, down by 5, bases loaded: Igawa time?

10. Who tells Hank he has to go outside to smoke?

6 comments:

Rama Lama Dingdong said...

Who put the bomp in the bomp shoo womp shoo womp?

BernBabyBern said...

Bottom of the ninth, tie score against Boston. Jason Giambi draws a walk. Who pinch-runs?

A. Hideki "The Speedster" Matsui
B. Morgan "Fleet Feet" Ensberg
C. Nobody. Let Jason "Blaze of Glory" Giambi run
D. Brett Gardner

BUT ... here's the trick, Brian ... you can only say "D" if you intend to keep Gardner on the roster.

We don't need 15 first basemen ... we need Gardner creating some havoc on the basepaths


(I was going to use "The Flash" as a nickname, but I thought Prince F. would have grounds to sue me if I associated the name with Morgan Ensberg)

Bary Allen said...

What? Am I back yet?

Jersey said...

I'm a Journal News (LoHud) subscriber... no, it's not a good paper. At all.

BernBabyBern said...

Don't know about the paper, because I haven't seen it in about 15 years.

Pete's Yankees blog at LoHud is excellent, though.

Dr. Fonzworth said...

Now that Brett Gardner has hit himself in the face with a foul ball, I think his ticket to the local hospital in Scranton is punched.

I saw him in game vs. Cleveland yesterday and his "run" is over. Here's the evidence:

A. He was down to a .300 average, which means he hasn't had a hit in a while.

B. I wanted to see him hit ( and do well ) , but I had a sense he would strike out. Three pitches later, that's what he did. Never got the bat on the ball.

C. He is not a hitter and never will be. Most of his hits are grounders that he beats out.

D. He will maybe get some time with the Yanks as a defensive replacement and base-stealer, but he is not destined for a starting OF slot with the Yanks.

You can make book on that.