Yankee Employee of the Month Deadline Tonight

Screw the trading deadline. I've been talking to people on the streets of London, and let me tell you, they are totally obsessed with what's happening in the Yankee Employee of the Month election.

Also, and I mean no disrespect here, all the talk about bad teeth over here is nonsense. I haven't seen any worse teeth here than you'd experience in Utica.

But getting back to the issue at hand: At last glance, Robbie Cano is leading by one measily vote over Kei "Survivor of the Trading Deadline" Igawa, while Kyle "The People's Choice" Farnsworth is trailing... BUT PICKING UP SUPPORT. This is like the delegate count at the Democratic Convention. Do you guests know that you can change your vote? You can be like Sidney Greenstreet in Casa Blanca, sitting in the back of the Casbah and counting your bowls of fruit, as the candidates seek your approval.

This is critical, because if the Curse of the Yankee Employee of the Month holds true, we ought to be looking very carefully at whom we intend to install as the next cover Yankee for this site.

And by the way, Alphonso is right: We're about to get obliterated by the Angels.

Gotta go. The Queen wants me. Can't keep Mum waiting.