Are You Listening To This?

Suzyn can't stop talking about Texas Ranger Chris Davis, because he says he's trying to beat his hitting slump by wearing a thong. Suzyn mentioned the thong like three times during his 2nd inning AB (SO). Suzyn also says that Davis also says that he got the thong idea from "an aging slugger." Gentleman John interrupted her before she could identify you-know-who.

UPDATE! Suzyn is worried about the Texas pitcher's shoulder, because he once had an anvil fall on it or something. Suzyn is also worried about people getting down on Brett Gardner for being afraid to steal bases, because she can really see his side. John counters that nobody in the world sells more real estate than Remax.

UPDATE! Oops, Chris Davis just threw his bat into the stands. No mention of the thong.

UPDATE! Promotional logjam. John had to wait until after the 16th out to note that we had the 15th out and that means you can save $15 with Halliburton, or whatever. Unacceptable.

UPDATE! John Sterling just said the most John Sterlingy thing John Sterling ever said. He started to call the 3-run Thrilla By Godzilla an A-Bomb From A-Rod. His actual quote*: "IT'S AN A-BOMB--if it were by A-Rod."

*CORRECTION! Yeah, it was more like, "IT'S AN A-BOMB... from Hideki Matsui... it would be an A-Bomb... if it were from A-Rod." Duque, can we get a recording for like posterity and stuff?

UPDATE! John's errorless streak ends, but Yankee bats pick him up. Let's have less talk of curses.

UPDATE! Do you see how I used bigger text for the correction? That's called accountability and I learned it from Derek Jeter. Before I turned 50.

UPDATE! You could die waiting for Veras to get the final out.

UPDATE! John, if doing the WinWarble is such a drag, how about this? Don't do it any more.

UPDATE! WCBS will donate $10 per strikeout? What is this, 1952?

UPDATE! Michael Savage is on! And he's angry at England.