KARDASHIAN NEWS NETWORK _ In a rare public appearance Thursday, Kim Kardashian's cleavage was brutally flower-bombed, apparently by a jubilant but drug-addled former New York Yankee, who in reliving a walk-off 2009 victory, mistook her busom for the face of centerfielder Melky Cabrera.
Kardashian's cleavage was visiting New York to speak on behalf of its humanitarian campaign for humanitarianism, when former Yankee pitcher AJ Burnett - half-blinded by a spring bunting incident - leaped onto the stage, confronted the two breasts and yelled, "Way to go, Melky!" He then tossed a bag of flower - he had no access to cream pie - into the famous cleavage.
Bodyguards hustled the cleavage into a bulletproof bra, where it could be secured, as well as lifted and separated. Burnett is now said to be at Rikers Island, collaborating with co-trustee Louise Meanwell on an unauthorized biography of Yankee GM Brian Cashman.
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