Listen: You don't wanna make my Personal Life Vendetta Shitlist.
In fact, in this world, here are the top 7 worst Personal Life Vendetta Shitlists to find yourself on:
10. Taylor Swift. (You'll get a song written about you.)
9. Fox News. (Round the clock coverage of your wart.)
8. Joe Biden. (You'll be forgotten.)
7. Peter Thiel. (You'll be labeled the Antichrist.)
6. ICE (Next stop, Somalia.)
5. Saudi Prince Bin Salman. (Bone saw.)
4. Jeffrey Epstein. (You don't wanna to be on any of his lists.)
3. Donald Trump. (You'll get indicted.)
2. Mine. (You'll get beaned.)
1. Vladimir Putin. (You'll accidentally fall out of a window.)
That said, I have one takeaway from watching my enemies this postseason:
We should thank the juju gods for not having to be humiliated again by the Dodgers.
Watching their all-star team steamroll the NL - well - let's celebrate our early exit.
I won't complain about how the Dodgers spent $313 million - $50 million more than the Yankees - on payroll, and how that number actually ignores the deferrals made on Shohei Ohtani's contract, which amounts to a cooking-of-the-books that Old George could only have fantasied.
I won't whine over how the Dodgers buy pennants, and world championships, or how their pipeline to Japan's greatest stars - three straight years, the best players went to LA - gives them a huge advantage.
Nope. I won't complain. Not a peep. For 100 years, the Yankees used their money advantage to dominate baseball. Now, it's the Dodgers. Let's just be glad we don't have to get embarrassed.
Listen: Had we gotten past Toronto, and then Seattle, we'd only have been more humiliated in the end.
The gap between the Dodgers and Yankees - hell, between the Dodgers and everyone - is long, deep and dark. Be glad we're done. They can't hurt us any more.
And if I happen to get indicted and sent to Somalia, where I fall out of a window, you know why.
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14 comments:
If you happen to fall out of a window, here's hoping it's a slider one step up from nice soft grass.
...after you lose your balance cheering the fact that HAL has mercifully sold the Yankees.
It's called Defenestration.
I propose nationwide demonstrations for Saturday, November 1, 2025. NO Dynasty Day.
Elephant in the room . . .
Just more gloom and doom . . .
Worse than Boone . . .
Or BOOM ! BOOM ! BOOM ! . . .
Shohei Ohtani !
Ohtani played an amazing game. I think they'll be talking about that one for years. Certainly longer than the flagpole homer.
And a big apology to the IIHers who might have shown up for a few beers while I'm in New York. This whole week has been a blur and today doesn't look any better.
JM - As much as I sincerely wanted to be there to partake in a tasty beverage or two with you and all of the dozens of other IIHerZ, regrettably I'm committed to attending a conference in this weekend in Lincoln, Nebraska on the long term benefits of Gopher flossing in the new age.
I hope that the blur sharpens up enough to make that happen.
Concerning your other comment – Judge's foul pole dinger was exciting and redemptive at best.
Ohtani's performance yesterday was legendary . . .
Very sorry about that, JM, but I think I speak for all of us when I say we are your disposal, and completely understand that things come up.
Good piece, Duque, though I'll quarrel with you—a little—about the Yankees' money advantage helping them for a hundred years.
Sure, the Yanks' money helped—it always does!—when competing against teams such as the Athletics, the Senators, the Browns, and usually the White Sox, teams that were barely competing at all. And yes, that's half the league.
But in the years before electronic broadcasting, at least—and for some time after radio came in—the Yanks didn't have that much of an advantage in revenue.
And even when Yawkey bought the BoSox and started spending money like it was crypto, they didn't catch up. The Yanks not only spent, they spent wisely. Getting the up-the-middle combination of Berra, Ford, and Mantle—three of the greatest players in the game—for a total of about $9,000.
The St. Louis Browns missed Berra even though he was from St. Louis. They would not shell out a $250 bonus for him. They also missed out on The Mick, when his father brought him in for a tryout. According to some accounts, they didn't even look at him. And Whitey Ford was passed up by both the Giants and the Dodgers for being too small.
The Yanks' real advantage was that they were smart. Something that has a certain relevance today...
I went to the big march today and marched. Slowly, but we covered 30+ blocks.
This week, I've done a shitload of walking. 54 miles or so starting Monday.
Perhaps I overdid it a tad.
Hoss, when is the next book coming out?
The salary cap will happen if the Dodgers win…
Bitty - you survive the day ?
Yes, thanks AA. And fuck Ohtani. I'm not bitter.
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