For 35 years, your blustery fans whined about John Sterling's rampant shows of favoritism during Yankee radio broadcasts, driven by Jeep.
You never got over Sterling's shtick, the home run calls and Win-Warbles, and how his voice lilted unto heaven when the Yankees had a lead. You prosecuted John and Suzyn Waldman with the vigor of Rand Paul in a Covid hearing. How dare the Yankees employ flagrant home team announcers, befouling the otherwise pristine Harding & Mazzotti Broadcast Booth! (By the way, hurt your body? Call Harding & Mazzotti!)
Well, today, the Righteous Redsocks - Curt Schilling's chosen team - can bathe in its self-sustaning acrimony, thanks to the radio team of Will Flemming and Will Middlebrooks. They did something Sterling wouldn't have touched in his entire career. They called for a Boston pitcher to "drill" a Yankee batter and pick a fight during the late stage of a 16-1 plastering.
This came about because Jazz Chisholm stole third in the eighth, with the Yankees leading 14-1. The Boston infield wasn't holding him on, and he basically jogged to third. Defensive indifference. Austin Wells was batting against Boston's Jovani Moran, and in the booth, Flemming was seething over the indignity of Chisholm's move.
"Wouldn't you sort of like to see Moran drill Wells right here?" Flemming asked.
Well, speaking on behalf of the Yankiverse, YEAH!
I mean, who wouldn't want a full-on, bench-clearing brawl! We haven't had a bonkers, bare-fisted street rumble in waaaaay too many years. I've wondered what Giancarlo Stanton has been doing in the Yankee dugout. Now I know: He's waiting for his chance to grab little Caleb Durbin and fling him like a Frisbee into the upper deck. Come on, everybody, grab the testosterone and let's do some Hegseth!
Look, I get it that Chisholm didn't need to steal third. But who cared? Certainly not Boston. They had given up, because their 4-year-old center fielder didn't get the call on a trapped line drive, so - hey - let's pick a fight! Maybe Flemming could punch out Suzyn? And if they hurt their body... well, you know who to call.
Folks, isn't that what is happening all across America?
Something goes wrong, so drill the nearest guy and let's fight.
I already know what Boston will do about Flemming's words. Nothing. Maybe he'll recant, sorta, with a winky-wink. And if the Yanks play Boston in the postseason - right now, they'd be hosting the Redsocks in a three-game wild card series - what are the odds that somebody doesn't drill Chisholm?
Yep, congrats to all you Fenway Freedom Fighters. You guys are something. See you in October.
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27 comments:
They will never NOT be the biggest, dumbest assholes on the block.
Luis Gil has been recalled from SWB and is expected to fill a bullpen role.
Yerry De Los Santos demoted in a corresponding move
Red Sox continue to show so much class.
It's low class, but still...
Hey, I'd love to see 'em drill Chisholm. That's a surefire way for him to get on base. He usually strikes out on three giant swings.
Red Sux usually resort to stupidity when they're losing. Here are some of their shenanigans: (1) use an opener, sometimes unannounced, by reporting at the last possible minute that their starter has a tummy ache, which starter then makes a miraculous recovery after one or two innings and enters the game; (2) make a last minute change to their starter just before the game; (3) use a knuckleball pitcher to throw off Yankee batters' timing for the next week or two; (4) start a beanball war by throwing at heads; (5) throw up and in and try to break the wrists or damage the hands of Yankee batters; (6) use technology to cheat by stealing signs; (7) use technology to cheat by cooking baseballs.
Yesterday, in a variation of tactic #3 above, they tried to flummax Yankee batters by pitching one of their position players. If Yankee batters couldn't hit a position player's pitching, their hope was that the Yankees would start to doubt themselves and lose confidence, perhaps go into a slump. I think the dimwits forgot how bad the Yankees are at hitting. When you have a terrible hitting team, they'll destroy terrible position player pitching. Am I right? That's how Austin Wells did a half season's worth of hitting in one inning.
Tactic #3 is used in real life by many desperados, soldiers and warriors in battle, and even the humble porcupine. If you're about to be killed, you try to drag your killer down to hell with you, or at least give your killer something to remember you by for the rest of his life, usually by planting your blade inside of him. (From "The Trooper" by Iron Maiden: "You'll take my life, but I'll take yours too/You fire your musket, but I'll run you through")
In the animal kingdom, hungry mountain lions have been known to kill and eat porcupines. But that's just slow death. Even if one of those quills gets into the mountain lion's stomach, it will embed itself in the intestinal tract and cause an infection that ultimately results in a very painful, horrible death. And the porcupine will have its revenge, even if it's from beyond the grave.
I have always felt a deep sympathy for Red Sox fans...
If you know any send them a mental hug today....
It must be tough.....
That deep, unexpressed, debilitating pain....
I sincerely sympathize.
So now off to La-La Land to play the Hell's Angels motorcycle gang. Tonight's starter for the Halos, Walbert Urena. I don't know about you guys, but I think this guy really should file a name change application. Do you want your name to bring up an association with a urinal on a bathroom wall?
The Yankee always struggle against the Fallen Angels, even if they've fallen, (and can't get up). So look for the winged demons to win two of three or maybe even sweep.
Yes, I know I predicted doom and gloom against the Red Sux, and it turned out pretty well. But the double dip certainly helped the Yankees. The 1-0 Cam Schlittler game helped. That was a series that really could've gone the other way. We got lucky, in my opinion.
I'd like to kick 'em in their nuts.
'Fraid I've got musicosis. As defined by David Lee Roth, it's when you can't get a tune out of yer head. Here's The Rolling Stones again, with "Doom and Gloom":
I had a dream last night that I was piloting a plane
And all the passengers were drunk and insane
I crash landed in a Louisiana swamp
Shot up a horde of zombies, but I come out on top
What's it all about?
Guess it just reflects my mood
Sitting in the dirt
Feeling kind of hurt
All I hear is ... doom and gloom
And all is darkness ... in my room
I gotta see that new movie, "The Dog Stars"!
It pleases me to no end that all of New England is boiling over the No Catch call. You can't believe the outrage spewing forth from these twat waffles.
I friggin' love it.
That works, too.
The score was 7-1 at the time, not 14-1, which makes the Flemming comments even more egregious.
You have my blessing
All the Boston frothing over that call—in a game they lost, 16-1—is ridiculous. Particularly considering the fact that the replay clearly shows Pouty Rafaela dragging the ball along the turf.
Yankees have claimed right-handed reliever John Schreiber from the Royals
He has a 3.65 ERA in 49.1 IP this season
Scranton shuttle frequent flyer?
Racist townie assholes.
There are some legitimate human beings that are carmines fans. But they're few and far between and I actually pity *them*.
I hope they all get ulcers from the seething hatred.
Then find out that the neighbors dog fcked their mother and that’s how they were conceived.
Other than that, I wish them the best while they experience all of Dante's circles of hell.
Fun Dante fact (yeah, bet you never thought you'd see that written out):
Dante is entombed in the same church as Macchiavelli, Michaelangelo, Marconi, Galileo
Wow, I gotta go see that place sometime!
I just looked up the fact that Dante is not actually there, but there is very large monument sculpture for him there. There's other guys in the floor there, too, who I forget.
Better than the domo if you're visiting Florence. Aka Disneyland for the Renaissance. Good food too in Florence (Firenze), but don't expect red sauce (or "red gravy" in some hoods). They are NORTHERN Italian, not the riffraff from Naples/Sicily. Or so they say.
Other fun facts: spaghetti from Asia (earlier) and tomatoes from the America's (later)
Rays just loaded the bases with no outs against the Metsies, and pulled off a Yankee: no runs! The Queens team leads, 1-0, after 5.
I think I want to see "Coyote vs. Acme"
They always played on the same team. Unless you think acme was subversive.
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