Today's Rivalometer

 

Hughes paints his masterpiece! 

Bard gets shellacked! 

If you hated "One Year Ago Today"--and who didn't?--this will drive you nuts. Each game day from now until the end of the world I will check the pulse of The Only Rivalry That Matters. Don't care who's up? Can't face who's down? Then stay away, because Mustang's riding this roller coaster and there's no stopping it now. Peace!

Bristol to "Sports Guy" : You suck!

I figured this would make a fellow Yankees fan's day:

Apparently, that no-talent ass clown that refers to himself as the "Sports Guy" for the four letter website got himself in hot water with his NFL picks column over this past weekend, and Bristol refused to run the column on its website, EllsburySchillingPapelbonNetwork.com.

Hopefully, he will soon be back standing behind a bar on Boylston Street in Bahhhh-stan, talking about the Red Sox and serving clam chowwww-dah to tourists in tee shirts.

*****

In other notes from the GM meetings in Dana Point, California, Yankees general manager Brian Cashman stated yesterday that it is his intent to sign not one, but two starting pitchers. Also, he makes 1B more of a priority than CF. And Joba 'Leavin' Las Vegas' Chamberlain, when not putting girls through college at local titty bars, will be a full time starter next year, limited to roughly 25-28 starts.

Phil Hughes dominated the AZ "who gives a shit league" League last night, pitching through immense pain with a lacerated fingernail to post a line of: 5 innings, 1 hit, 0 runs, 0 walks, 8 strikeouts. 59 pitches, 41 strikes.

Oh, and Ian Kennedy has been dispatched to Puerto Rico. Hopefully he never returns.

*****

Get out and vote today, People !

Phil Hughes update: He's Alive! He's Alive!

After three long weeks with no contact, Franchise Blogger Phil Hughes has reached out to his devoted minions to let them know he has not forgotten them.

Here is the message, three weeks in the making:


Hope everyone is doing well. Not too much to report lately from Tampa. I was in shock when I found out the extent of my rib injury. Not the best way to start off the season to say the least. I will post more when there is more news.

I didn’t get a chance to watch last night’s season finale. So don’t spoil it. Haha. Later


... and the followers were pleased. These comments went up almost immediately:

"young pitchers are supposed to have growing pains, even the best prospect of 2007 Mr. Phil Hughes. get well soon brother, i cant wait to see you come back in the 2nd half and making those sox/met fans who doubted you eat crow."

"Thanks for posting. It’s always great to hear from you! I know you’re going through a rough time right now, but things will definitely get better :-D PS: I think the glasses will work for you–I actually think they make a pitcher look more intimidating… just look how much more badass Edwar looks with his on"

"I can’t wait until I get to see your glasses! I got glasses recently and they take a little while to get used to but you end up liking them. It is good to see you are updating again!"

In Review... or: The Bermuda Triangle (sic)

Tonight, Joba proved mortal.
Much like when Mo blew the save against the D-Backs in 2001, the world learned that this was merely a man throwing the most dreaded pitch in MLB history... not a machine.

Tonight, Joba gave up the same amount of runs in one inning, that he had given up in his short major league career.

This is my response:

In this next shot, we have a diagram of what Joba, Hughes, and IPK (shown above) will mean to the Yankees for the next 10 years:


My preliminary analysis of this diagram leaves me to believe that it's a strong possibility that we (as in everyone) will rely on the arms of these three pitchers for many years to come. As you can see, having Joba (on that small northeast island), Hughes (on the western mainland), and Kennedy (drifting on those other islands a bit southeast of everyone else), will lead us (that cryptic symbol in the middle) to victory upon victory.

As some old guy once said:

"Veni, vidi, vici"

Oblique Strain for Hughes

Well, that's the diagnosis, anyway, so Phil Franchise is the Yankees' DL Addition of The Day. Congrats, Phil!

Suzyn is hoping that Darrell Rasner gets called up. Her excitement is palpable (and kind of icky, actually.)
Maybe what's required now are some Oblique Strategies, a system of dealing with challenges, co-created by non-musician and former Roxy Music member Brian Eno, producer of U2 and the imminent Coldplay album.

They need hits, too. Couldn't hurt.

Phil Hughes and the fading fastball

If you're wondering why Phil Hughes' fastball is topping out in the low-90s instead of the mid-90s, check out Mike Pagliarulo's observation.

Hughes Startles Baseball World

The eyes of the world have focused on phenom Phil Hughes.

Last night, in Tampa, Florida, we learned why there are " several voices who believe Phil Hughes is better than Kennedy or Chamberlain."

And we aren't talking comparisons with political luminaries. Just young pitching prospects.

It is now a recorded fact that in five innings against the Phillies, Phil only gave up 3 runs.

This may become a new standard for excellence in MLB.

To my mind, it shows that Cashman made the right choice in staying away from the Johan deal. Three runs in five innings is just extraordinary.

To my eyes, this is a can't miss prospect. A shoe-in for Cooperstown.

Think of it. Only three runs for every five innings pitched. The sky is the limit.

This guy will have an ERA well under 10.00 for the 2008 season. Count on it.

Only Matt Desalvo came close to such a performance once in Spring Training ( 3 runs in four innings), before he had to have arm surgery.

Battle of the Blogs: Phil Hughes vs. Pat Neshek

It comes with the territory, I guess.

When you're a Yankee, there's a target on your uniform. Everyone wants to take you down.

Since the end of last season, it's been no different. George Mitchell, Mr. Redsock, shockingly aims the drug investigation at the Yanks, apparently unable to track down any trainers in his own locker room. The Rays (whose attendance is so bad they had the first part of their name repossessed), are vainly trying to make pests of themselves - they're the baseball equivalent of a foo-foo dog that bites annoyingly at your ankle until you're forced to kick it to the curb.

And now, we're being challenged on the Internet.

Pat Neshak of the Twins (You remember the Twins, right? The team that wanted half of our farm system for Johan Santana, then traded him to the Mets for two Happy Meal toys and a 10-percent-off coupon from Sears?) has been blogging for a while. All well and good.

But then our hero, The Franchise, Phil Hughes, started his own blog this year. And started getting a pretty big following. Hell, Phil could post that he just took a crap and he'd get 200 fawning comments under the post ("tx 4 sharng that dude-thats awsome - ur so cool U ROCKKKKK!!!!!!!)

And then he started giving stuff away. Stuff like autographed hats and baseballs and the like.

And that's when Neshak took direct aim at the Franchise.

Pat stared having his own contests, saying this: "Up on the message board is a FREE contest for a Signed Joe Mauer Debut McFarlane figure from this year's collection. I need to keep up with Phil Hughes's site...that guy will probably give away a car next!"

Well, friends, Phil didn't waste much time firing back.

He's giving away a Shelly Duncan-signed bat, video games, a signed baseball, a team-issue used shirt, even a cork from a champagne bottle used in last year's wild-card celebration.

Get ready boys. This is heating up.

Can't wait for the car giveaway.

Yankee Insider: Phil Hughes gives us a peek inside his spring training scrapbook

Wowser, wowser. We've been given EXCLUSIVE access to Phil Hughes' spring training scrapbook, with scenes TOO HOT for his blog.

Check it out:

Breakfast at the condo

Giambi and Karstens arrive in camp in "the best shape ever."

Some guy from MLB talked to the team about banned drugs.

We had some sweet birthday cake for Chase Wright

After Saturday's game, the Captain took us sailing

Curt Schilling Can Eat Phil Hughes

Word arrives through our new pal Yankees Muse that PHIL HUGHES IS BLOGGING!!! Scoops: he apparently wants to be called Phil, not Phillip!! And he likes the Chargers over the Pats and the Giants over the Packers!! This is even bigger news than Edwar Ramirez' MySpace page, which I'm starting to believe isn't really my 'friend' Edwar's at all...