Peter Gammons’ Daily Spring Training Schedule

8 a.m. Pick up Mr. Epstein's laundry.

9-10 a.m. With red pen, note flabby writing in today’s Shaughnesssy column.

10-11 a.m. Over cream of wheat, recap entire 1967 “Impossible Dream” season to waitress.

11-noon. Ship courtesy Redsock caps, jerseys, posters to ESPN headquarters.

Noon-2 p.m. Under bridge, regale homeless man with account of 2004 “Idiots” championship season.

2-3 p.m. Visit Redsock complex, light candle in Redsock Chapel, ask Yaz for guidance in personal life.

3-4 p.m. Watch Jacoby Ellsbury work out, periodically licking lips and muttering, “Splendid... splendid...”

4-4:10 p.m. While riding in golf cart, dictate to ESPN intern story predicting stardom for Jacoby Ellsburg.

4:15-8 p.m. To waitress in cocktail bar, recap career of Pumpsie Green.

9 p.m. Drop off Mr. Epstein’s laundry for next day.

10 p.m. Check IT IS HIGH, and forgive us, because hey, he's cool and has a sense of humor and, besides, that’s what Yaz would do.