Bobby Abreu Is Getting Desperate

In an effort to up his 'signability', Bobby Abreu had his agent construct snowmen like this all over American cities seeking Corner-OF-DHs that are scared of outfield fences and walls.

The snow sculpture featuring the smiling RFer was based on a photo submitted by El Comedulce after he signed his five year, $64 million contract with the Phillies in 2003.

So far, the Abreu Snowman has appeared in Rockport Maine, near the home of the Double-A Sea Dogs, in downtown Syracuse, the home of the Triple-A Chiefs and on the outshirts of Toledo, home to the famous Triple-A Mud Hens.

His price tag of $35-$45 million over three seasons has apparently dropped, according to his agent. This is thought to be true based not only on the effects of the economy and the recent lowball signing of former teammate Pat Burrell by the Tampa Bay Devil Dogs, but also the sign El Snowdulce is holding is fairly indicative of the trying times.

Would a one-year, $30,000 offer from the Portland Sea Dogs do the trick? Or maybe a one-year bench role from the Yankees for $10,000, plus some Jeter equipment Abreu could sell on Ebay and he could drink on Alphonso's tab at the Cantina? Would that seal the deal?