Uh-oh, MLB has an image problem, because it's not a Yankee charged with PEDs

Bud Selig's Department of Homeland Security intends to doublecheck Ryan Braun's day-glow plasma. The theory: Braun must have been bitten by a radioactive dung beetle, because a fine young Milwaukee Brewer such as he would never inject artificial man juice into his pride-swollen gonads. Only Yankees do that. Right? Braun is Bernie Brewer, a cog in the Old Milwaukee feel-good campaign, who takes the field each day in the great shadow of the famous Bud Selig statue.

Yep, MLB has a serious PR problem: It's not a Yankee.

If only it were Arod or Swish, or anybody - Kei Igawa would have earned his pay just for swapping pee - then MLB could do what it always does: Blame the Yankees.

Consider the Angels and Marlins dollar drop last week. The problem was simple: It wasn't the Yankees. It was teams that spent the last 10 years (or in the Marlins' case, their entire existence) blaming the Yankees for putting money in players' pockets and ruining the owners' chances to keep salaries low. Now we've got a pristine National League cover-boy caught with his hand in the testicles jar.

Other teams -- being Yankees. What will Bud do?

I propose a solution:

TRADE RYAN BRAUN TO THE YANKEES.

WE'LL GIVE THEM A PROSPECT AND CASH. (MONEY THAT IS, NOT THE GM). THUS, MLB KEEPS ITS SANCTIMONIOUS IMAGE AS THE ONE OPERATING PRO SPORT IN AMERICA THAT DOESN'T HAVE WORK-STOPPAGES OR RETIREES WHO CAN'T DO CROSSWORD PUZZLES.

TRADE BRAUN TO THE YANKEES, AND WHILE WE'RE AT IT, LET THE YANKEES BUY YU DARVISH, OR SOMEBODY, PRINCE FIELDER MAYBE... JUST TO KEEP ALL THAT SELF-RIGHTEOUS INDIGNATION BACK UNDER THE CAPS OF THE OTHER OWNERS.

MAKE BRAUN A YANKEE.
BECAUSE BASEBALL NEEDS VILLAINS.