Friday, March 6, 2015

Running out of numbers to retire, Yanks may jettison letter "C"

What is it with an Evil Empire that everything is supposed to be immortal and last forever? It's one thing to retire the jersey of Babe Ruth and Mickey Mantle. With all due respect... It's another to retire Jorge Posada's number.

Now, the team's GM wants to retire a Yankee tradition. Says the Gray Lady:

General Manager Brian Cashman reiterated on Thursday what he said on at least two occasions last season: that he would like to have the title of captain retired along with [Derek] Jeter.

The Yankees are like a cheerleader who got laid for the first time last night, and she's vowing to never love another - even though the guy has moved on. Can't Jeter give the Yankees a gift basket? He's moving to Skaneateles Lake, probably the biggest cougar watering hole in the Northeast. Will it be a blemish on his sacred memory if somebody should ever be appointed Yankee captain again? Jeter's going to be drinking lemon drops on his boat. He's not going to care.

Maybe the Yankees should vow to never win a World Series again. That way, the great teams of the late 90s won't have to share their space in Yankee mythology with anybody else. In fact, maybe that's the reason by pennywise Hal Steinbrenner's cheapness: He doesn't want to make his dad look bad by winning championships.

Listen: This isn't about Jeter. Everybody agrees he's great. (DEREK AKBAR! DEREK AKBAR!) Nobody's going to forget him, any more than we've forgotten Munson, or Mattingly, or Catfish, or any of them. But I'd hate to think the mighty New York Yankees never again field a player worthy of being called "Captain." What a sad organization that would be. Besides, all those poor guys who are wearing numbers 70 through 99 deserve a shot at something.

3 comments:

KD said...

To suggest that the NYY actually retire the CONCEPT of a Captain is so foolish and stupid that it defies words. Anybody holding such an opinion has no appreciation of the Yankee organization, its history, or its fans.

One can only conclude that Alphonso is correct: Cashman is a moron. All doubts are hereby cast aside.

Alibi Ike said...

Retire "Captain", bring in "Admiral" "General" "Field Commandant" or "Savior"

Leinstery said...

They should retire "Captain" and start using the title "Führer". I bet it'd be a hit around the league. As far as retiring Posada's number goes, I had to look that up because I thought you were joking. I don't get that. Bernie and Pettitte, eh I guess. They're no Ruth, Gherig, or even Mandela but they hold some big records.