TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT

TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT
Tonight's moon phase: WANING CRESCENT

FIFTY THOUSAND MOONS

Sunday, January 10, 2016

A 45-day double-secret probation for Aroldys Chapman could leave the Yankees "troubled" and smiling

It's A-Rold Day in NYC. The Gray Lady devotes 20 angry inches to the Yankees' "troubling trade" for Aroldys Chapman, even adding a dab of Jell-O...

... two days before the controversies surrounding Bill Cosby entered a new chapter, the Yankees acquired Aroldis Chapman...

The article starts with Cosby, then adds Ray Rice, Pete Rose, a Harvard big-brain, a political oil can, women everywhere, and then finishes with the Yankees' Star Wars Holy Trinity: Gary Cooper, Lou Gehrig and Joe Torre, the immortals who had made the franchise a beacon of morality... until they jumped into bed with Cosby and Ray Rice. Listen: Nobody is going to defend a wife-beater, nobody, but Chapman isn't going to be the first tear in the Yankee bunting.

The best line is a description of the deal...

... a trade that cost the Yankees four minor-league players, an exchange roughly equivalent to swapping a Brooklyn brownstone for a few rooms in a high-rise in Weehawken.

Huh. Chapman's a Brooklyn brownstone?

Okay... sooooooooo...

Meanwhile, at River Ave, they're wondering if morally bankrupt Evil Emp fans should hope Chapman gets Shoeless Joed for more than 45-days, because that would mean his free agency rolls over another entire year. We'd have him through 2017, and we could use him like a tube of toothpaste.

Fun fact: This would be the second time since 2014 that the Yankee brass has sought a harsh penalty for one of its players. The Randy Levine party-of-four practically begged Rug Selig to ban A-Rod for life, back when he was Yankee Public Enemy No. 1. (Though nobody ever claimed he hit women.) Says Mike at River...

At this point, there’s nothing more the Yankees or fans can do other than wait. Hoping a player is suspended more than 46 days for a domestic violence incident so you can keep him another year is kinda icky. I’m hoping Chapman’s suspension will be short so the Yankees can get 60+ high-impact innings from him, then move on next winter.

I'll take icky. The worst case scenario would be 44 days, plus no spring training. And hopefully, no more Cosby comparisons. Seriously, that is icky.

1 comment:

John M said...

How about they give him 45 days for the girlfriend abuse and tack on a day or two for the garage? That would work.

Or they could chain him to a chair and let his girlfriend go after him with a bat, but that might hurt his throwing arm.