The Abyss Gazes Back

FIFTY THOUSAND MOONS

Saturday, January 23, 2016

As Mets strengthen their grip on NY, the Yankees do what comes naturally: They pass on Cespedes

Wednesday, Hal Steinbrenner made a rather comical remark to reporters while entering the Bohemian Grove East conference of the Loyal Order of Illuminati, aka the MLB owners' meetings. Food Stamps suggested the Yankees might still be in on free agent Yoenis Cespedes because, "You never know with the Yankees. We've surprised people in the past." 

Quickly, cheerleader squads across the Yankiverse started projecting our lineup with Cespedes aboard - a concept that makes about as much sense as President Palin. Having passed on three aces - Price, Greinke and Cueto, none of which would cost a draft pick - arguing why we should sign Cespedes is a task worthy of a 10-part Netflix docu-series, The Making of a Malady. Clearly, the Yankees had zero interest in Cespedes, no matter how low he was willing to go to stay in Gotham.

The fact is, the Retrieval Empire has always passed on Cespedes. They passed on him as a free agent escapee from Cuba. They passed on him at numerous trade deadlines, when he was passed around like a plate of liver. Somewhere within the Yankee cortex, the Grand Nameless Scout - the ghost of Billy Conners? - sees Cespedes as the second coming of Danny Tartabull.  Why bid on him now? To add a fifth OF and force a deal with Brett Gardner?

"You never know with the Yankees? We've surprised people in the past."

What a boatload of crud. Was Hal being whimsical? He must be wearing super-comfortable Haines briefs. Maybe next time, he'll burst into song, like an episode of Glee. I'm thinking he was stoned. It was a 10 a.m. "wake and bake," and he thought he was on the Charlie Rose Show.

Wait. I take it back. There is some truth here. Around this time last year, the Yankees surprised everyone with one of the cheapest decisions in the new Millennium. We let Boston outbid us for Yoan Moncada. Hey, you never know with the Yankees.

For the record, I'm not whining that Food Stamps sat on his hands with Cespedes, though the Mets sure got him at a NY discount: $75 million over 3 years. But this winter, our wacky, madcap, irrepressible owner has done nothing to improve this team. I'd love to think there will be a better era someday, that the Yankees are truly building from the bottom, but I'm not convinced. We've heard that line for 15 years. This owner seems more interested in making money than winning. Nope... the Yankees are not the Yankees, the Mets now own New York, and most of the surprises... they are bad ones.

2 comments:

John M said...

We're the best mediocre team in New York City. You can't take that away from us. We earned that.

Anonymous said...

THAT CESPEDES SIGNING MADE ME SICK YESTERDAY. I WAS CONVINCED THAT EVEN IN THAT PUTRID DIVISION THEY ARE IN, WITHOUT THEIR 2 BEST HITTERS, (MURPHY AND CESPEDES), THE METS WOULD NOT WIN THE DIVISION...THEIR LINEUP SUCKS WITHOUT THE BOTH OF THEM, AND I DON'T CARE WHO'S PITCHING.....NOW, I DOUBT THAT....SONOFABITCH! .....FOOD STAMPS' QUOTE ABOUT "YOU NEVER KNOW WITH THE YANKEES, WE HAVE SURPRISED PEOPLE BEFORE" MAKES MY BLOOD BOIL.