Sunday, November 20, 2016

Official list of MLB team inquires to Yankees about Chase Headley

Chase Headley
From Seattle: "Does Chase Headley dye his hair?"

Detroit wants to know: "Is Chase Headley married or currently going out with anyone?"

From Milwaukee: "If Chase Headley could be a zoo animal, what do you think he would be?"

Colorado says: "What makes Chase Headley so - oh, wow - so, like, 'Chase Headleyish?' You know? He's like, 'Hey, I'm Chase Headley, everybody!' Which is okay, I mean - fuck me, I'm like so high right now that I could... Chase Fuckin' Headley, man! I think I just peed myself."

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

RED SOX: DOES CHASE HEADLEY SCHTOOP HIS WIFE MISSIONARY STYLE, OR SOME OTHER WAY?
CHICAGO: DOES HEADLEY LIKE CHICAGO STYLE PIZZA, OR THE THIN CRUST?
CINCINNATI: DOES HEADLEY DRINK RED CABERNET OR PINOT WHITE?

JM said...

NEW YORK: DOES HEADLEY PLAY FOR US? WHAT?

Anonymous said...

HAHA....YES....HE DOES SO LITTLE, IT'S LIKE HE'S NOT EVEN THERE.

Just Me said...

He is so quite that you never even know he is there and doing his job. Just what a club that is back page news every day needs. A low key player that just goes out and plays his best. Look up what he does, that is his states if you even care about being honest about him.

Parson Tom said...

Nobody doubts that he plays his best, tries his hardest and gives it his all. The problem is that his best ain't much.

Bottom of the list among AL 3B for Slugging pecentage and OPS. 10th out of 12 for Batting Average.

His grim walks back to the dugout after striking out more than 100 times showed a real sense of purpose. And his head-down trots back to the dugout after another weak, rally-killing grounder demonstrated great disappointment.

Headley looks like a real nice guy who is willing to do everything he can to succeed. Unfortunately, except for one year in San Diego, his career seems to be a testament to his lack of Major League talent. While I'm happy that he is providing generational wealth to his family with that amazing contract, I do believe the Yankees need to slide him into a Special Adviser role if they can't find another team looking for a bland, below-average player.

Anonymous said...

RIGHT ON POINT TOM.

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