Kevin Baker's book is here!

Kevin Baker's book is here!
"... an exemplary sports book..." Kirkus Reviews

Sunday, September 24, 2017

Deciphering the Girardi Sequence

This we know: The past is prelude. Stocks rise, then collapse. Taylor Swift falls in love, then blows up. You take a good dump, and a day later, your constipated again. This time of year, it may be sunny and pleasant, but out there in the Atlantic, a tropical depression is eating steroids. 

Over the last month, the Yankees have regularly interspersed short winning streaks with a loss - and sometimes a full-scale, Grade F, pungently ripened clunker. You know a Yankee clunker: Our opponent takes an early lead. We load the bases several times without scoring. Our bullpen implodes. We go three innings without a hit. They shut the door. In the ninth, we bring the tying run to the plate. He strikes out. Clunkerola. 

So the question is, based on what has happened thus far, what will the One Game Season - aka the Wild Card - serve up?

Since September 1, here is the Girardi Sequence:

Loss. Win. Blowout.  BlowoutLoss. Win. CLUNKER. Win. Blowout. Blowout.  Loss. Win. Blowout. Blowout. Blowout. Blowout. Loss. Win. Win. Blowout. Loss. Win...

Under the sequence, here is how the rest of the season, beginning today in Toronto, will unfold.

Blowout. Blowout. 
Loss. Win. Blowout. CLUNKER. Win. Blowout. 

Wild Card game... Blowout! 

Yes, as you see, we currently hold a proper trajectory entering the Nine Inning Season. But here's the rub: A loss today or tomorrow would dramatically alter the sequence, perhaps sending us into the "Selig Series" at the tail end of a mini-streak - ripe for a loss. 

The real key will be losing a clunker - I mean, an all-out shit show - to Toronto on the final weekend. We need to get the clunker out of our system. And regardless of how good it feels, we must NOT go into the Wild Card on a little mini-winning streak. We need to win the final game, but not the final three.

Next up: How long will the GOP go before the next try at health care?

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

CAN WE PLEASE STOP BENCHING GREG BIRD?

.....JUST WANT TO MAKE SURE.

Parson Tom said...

I appreciate the deep mathematic analysis that deciphered the Girardi Sequence. I worry, though, that it may be extrapolated to our ongoing streaks against specific teams. Specifically the Twins, who we beat like Buck Showalter's bullpen last time we saw them and for most of this century. Overdue for a clunker against the Twinkies? I hope not.

Alphonso said...

I just saw an omen. Chocolate cake twinkles appeared in our local grocery store.


A spice of life I first saw ( and consumed ) in Syracuse. The test markets must have gone well.

My dilemma; is this discovery a good omen or a bad one?

If I eat the entire box in one sitting is that good for the Yankees?

I need help from a twinkie.

Stang said...

Alphonso,

Eat the whole box and see what happens.

If we win, eat a box every day until we lose.

If we lose, eat a whole box of something else tomorrow.

JM said...


Garcia's performances each time through the order argue that he is not actually a starter, but a two or three inning middle reliever. But we continue to use him as a starter. That can't be a good idea in the long haul.

JJ in MA said...

Completely off topic: Jaime Garcia looks like Corey Feldman and is a mediocre at best pitcher.

Sorry, but it had to be said.

Anonymous said...

Alphonso - I don't know if I like the idea of "eating" our opponents. It's kind of like the Sin Eater from the pilot for The Night Gallery perhaps by "eating" the sugary or salty snack of the team we play we might absorb their sins.

So eating the Twinkie might give us Phil Hughes' long ball problem. Eating the Lays chemically infused and fake BBQ chips of the Astros might turns us collectively into Republicans. And, of course eating the Clam Chowdah of death would make us all total Massholes.

We need to go with our quintessential NY strengthening consumption. Eat a box of Entenmenn's Chocolate Donuts. Eat a half dozen Sabrett's Hot Dogs. Eat a Better Breakfast Every Day. Help your self at work or play.

The bottom line is, we CAN make a difference. After all, only YOU can prevent forest fires. We just need to choose carefully. Therefore choose life. (Sorry still doing the high holidays)

Doug K.

Leinstery said...

Garcia threw 60 pitches, 27 were strikes. Whereas Monty and Gray will throw a bunch of balls with strikes, I don't think I've ever seen Garcia throw strikes consistently at any point in a game. Who'd they trade for this bum?

Leinstery said...

"We're still trying to win the division" - proceeds to start Garcia and have Mitchell come in to sink them further.

Anonymous said...

Two young pitchers, one of them tearing up A-ball (a lefty, too), Leinstery.

Doug K: nice theory, but it doesn't work I can assure you: Lay's (at least, their kettle chips) does NOT turn one into a Republican - - far, far, from it; Snow's excellent NE Clam Chowder does not turn one into a beanhead bum; just like Entenmann's cherry cheese danish - - even a whole box of them - - does not turn one into a Yankee fan (especially if you already ARE one) - - and oh, for some nice, fresh NY Deli pastrami...God, I'm torturing myself! Stop, stop... OUT, Damned Spot!!

Anyway, we have 1 inning left at this point, to avoid wasting Judge's 47th AND 48th bombs. Out, out, damned sequence!!

...and, the Re-Thugs are already trying to make another attempt to repeal Obamacare: they asked Rand Baby what it would take to get his vote; he replied, "take the block-grants out of the bill" - - which, of course, would wreck their whole, damn sceme to destroy Medicaid, and give the money to the rich. They ask Murkowski daily, too - - believe me, they'll make any change they think will work - - for the next five days. LB (No J)

ranger_lp said...

You watch, Garcia on the postseason roster, Bird not on the postseason roster. Jeez.

HoraceClarke66 said...

And, once again Garcia falls juuuuuust short on his self-described quest to "go eight or nine" every time out.

I understand. I have also failed on my quest to win the lottery every day. Though I think I had a better chance.

The guys we gave up for him were the mysterious Dietrich Enns, and Zack Littell, who went 20-1 in the minors this year.

No, that's not a misprint. He went 20-1. But, you know,he doesn't throw hard or something, or he has a bad pick-off move to third base.

Alphonso said...

But we still have Ben Heller, Jonathan Holder and someone named Gallegos.

Those are the talented prospects Cashman didn't give up to get that rat dog from the Twins.

Which team, by the way, will not only defeat us in the one game, play-in, but laugh at us for taking Garcia and giving up more than a twinkie to get him,.

A lot more.

You see; incompetence is forgiven everywhere at the senior levels : Cashman is killing the Yankees, and Jerry Reese is like bubonic plague for the football Giants.

Yet, nothing happens to them, despite obvious, consistent failure.

Mediocrity prevails and continues forever.

Isiyku Abdulahi said...


I really want the world to know about this great man who brought back happiness into my life again after my husband left me and the kids 3 years ago for another women online when i contacted Dr Believe he cast a love spell for me within 48 hours my ex husband start calling me and begging for forgiveness for everything that have happened between us. I was so happy to have my family back together with love again here is the email of Dr Believe via believelovespelltemple@gmail.com a man with the great powers you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348156148821
God bless you
I am very grateful for your help in my marriage.