1. They're still on my shitlist for Sandy Koufax and Don Drysdale. I'm sorry. Maybe it's been 40 years. The grist of the gods grinds slowly, but infinitely fine. Their time has come. Suck on it, LA. YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE SWEPT US, AND THIS WAS ALWAYS COMING. NOW IT'S HERE. ARE YOU GLAD IT HAPPENED? ARE YOU CHEERING NOW?
2. Tommy Lasorda getting his picture taken with every Hollywood celebrity that ever had a lips-transplant. Was there a local law passed in Beverly Hills that required every faded star to get his or her photograph taken with Tommy Lasorda? Long time coming.
3. This will free up Don Mattingly to become manager of the Yankees after his 2 or 3 year apprentice period in Los Angeles. By then, Joe Girardi will have grown tired of winning World Series rings, so he will move on. Don will be ready and more than happy to leave the Chapter 11 Dodgers behind.
4. Another team suffering from the Curse of Manny. Thank God we never got the guy. In fact, of all the players in baseball who publicly stated they wanted to be Yankees, Manny Ramirez is the ONLY one that never got a chance. Hideki Irabu, Gary Sheffield, et al -- once George heard their sob story about wanting to become Yankees, it was just a matter of time. But not Manny. Nope. He's LA.
5. Steve Garvey. Hated the guy. Good riddance to any team that had him. (Note: Will always feel a little bad about Ron Cey, because of the beaning he took in the World Series -- it should have been Garvey.) Remember when they were actually talking about that guy having a political career someday? What's he doing now? I bet he's a sales manager for a car dealer.
6. OK, it's way before my time, but why not mention it: They betrayed Brooklyn in 1957. How they got away with it -- and even kept some of their fan base in NYC, I will never understand.
7. Somebody on their team should be good enough to sign with the Yankees on a firesale. Because they play in AAAA ball, I don't follow them. But I suppose they have a star or two that can serve as adequate backup for Russell Martin, if Gustavo Molina is hurt.
8. The Dodgers are admitting that they didn't have enough parking lot security on the night that Giants fan got mugged. A billionaire owner was cheap, because he and his wife had a falling out, and now a father of two is in a coma, and the guys who did it to him are still out there. Story of America, right? Not in my book. Make that owner run laps around the lot at 2 a.m., so he can feel the solitude. Take his team away.
9. Did I mention Sandy Koufax? IF HE'S IN THE HALL OF FAME, WHY IS ROGER MARIS NOT? Oh, you want the short answer? Roger Maris isn't in the Hall... because he was a Yankee. That's all. If he hit 61 home runs for the Kansas City Athletics... does anyone seriously think he doesn't go into the Hall first ballot? Sportswriters had a thing about the Yankees. Still do. (Watch your back, A-Rod.) But there is no greater injustice at Cooperstown -- not Pete Rose, not Barry Bonds, not nobody -- than the absence of Roger Maris. So fuck the Dodgers. They got their brief career pitcher, Sandy, into the Hall. Where's Roger? Where's Thurman? Where's Guidry? Ain't right. Fukkem. Dodgers in trouble? Boo fukking hoo.
10. Hell with them. They're not WORTH 10 reasons. I only chose ten because it's a round number. I don't want to waste my time coming up with a tenth reason. I'll save my 10 reasons for teams that matter, like the Toledo Mud Hens. Not for cheap-ass evil sexual misfit scurvy-boned bum outfits like the Dodgers.
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9 comments:
I've always been a big fan of yours El Duque and I agree with most of your points. I'm also a Yankee fan, George and I are getting along fine up here as I await my call back. Roger, Thurman, Guidry all belong....However, never denigrate the reputation of Sandy, one the greatest pitchers ever.
11. Bob Welch striking out Reggie in the '78 World Series.
I hate the Dodgers for all the same reasons, but truth is Sandy Koufax was the best pitcher I ever saw. Much better than the overrated Nolan Ryan.
Speaking of overrated, so is Vin Scully.
The guy was a great pitcher, but he didn't last long. Plus, his name was Sandy. I mean, come on. It's like his parents were thinking, 'Sure, it will be tough for a Jewish kid to make the big leagues, but just as a kicker we're going to give you a girl's name!' Yeah, really funny, Mr. Koufax.
Girls don't get in the Hall. And guys with girls' names shouldn't, either.
I mean, did Leslie Howard get in? Sure, he was an actor, not a ballplayer, but you know what I mean.
The guy was a great pitcher, but he didn't last long. Plus, his name was Sandy. I mean, come on. It's like his parents were thinking, 'Sure, it will be tough for a Jewish kid to make the big leagues, but just as a kicker we're going to give you a girl's name!' Yeah, really funny, Mr. Koufax.
Girls don't get in the Hall. And guys with girls' names shouldn't, either.
I mean, did Leslie Howard get in? Sure, he was an actor, not a ballplayer, but you know what I mean.
Kevin/Joe, for the record:
from
http://perryjgreenbaum.blogspot.com/2011/03/sandy-koufax-dodger-true-and-blue.html
Sandford Braun was born in the Borough Park section of Brooklyn, New York to Evelyn Braun (nee Lichtenstein) and Jack Braun on December 30, 1935.
When Sandy was three, his parents divorced, and his father abandoned the family. When Sandy was nine, his mother married Irving Koufax, a lawyer, and Sandy took his name.
In his new family Sandy got a sister, Edie. Of greater importance for a young boy, he grew close to his stepfather, whom he fondly considered his father and role model. As Matt Doeden wrote in Sandy Koufax: "When I speak of my father, I speak of Irving Koufax, for he has been to me everything a father could be." His father was there for the young boy and encouraged him.
kevin and John M.-
Great minds think alike.
There goes my Cooperstown campaign down the shitter.
So close, so so close.
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