THE ABYSS GAZES BACK

FIFTY THOUSAND MOONS

Thursday, May 7, 2015

First things to do after we take over Texas, mwah-hahahahaha....

1. Free the 880,000 hostages in Austin.

2. Deprogram the super-powered, anti-human, world-threatening robot known as "Jerry Jones."

3. Forget the oil fields; secure the BBQ joints.

4. Re-install Rick Perry as governor. (He never suspects a thing.)

5. Buy Josh Hamilton a case of beer.

6. Reveal the painful truth: Pro wrestling is scripted.

7. Install Sharia Law, force women to dress like Quonset huts, and require daily prayers in mosques.

8. Make it illegal for men to drive trucks, chew tobacco and scratch their balls.

9. Steal all the cowboy hats, robbing them of their super powers.

10. Let them secede.

1 comment:

Blind Robin said...

Make Louis Gohmert attorney general.