Virtual Baseball: Happ, Du Stew Brew Crew. New Bosses for Yanks' Rehab Camp.

J.A. Happ resumed his winning ways today, and the Yanks resumed hitting behind him in Milwaukee, the city that was once in the National League, came back to the American League, and then went to the National League again, though the Yankees sometimes go there for inter-league play.

Happ breezed to a 13-4 win, throwing seven strong innings, as "El Matador," Miguel Andujar, continuing his torrid play of late, belted two long home runs and threw a runner out at third.  Kyle Higashioka, New York's starting catcher, also homered, upping his average this season to .111.

Meanwhile, Yankees creature Lonn Chaney Trost announced today that the organization would be terminating the contracts of Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil, and Dr. Drew to run the team's rehab facility in Tampa.  Dr. Oz was in fact arrested later in the day, after remarking what an "appetizing opportunity" running the facility had been, and then making a lung for Trost's neck.

Dr. Phil left without incident but remarked that, without his guidance, injured Yankees players were in danger of catching an infectious swimming pool incident, while Dr. Drew pointed to the constructive work he had done getting teams of the Yankees injured to compete in putting on beachside Hawaiian luaus.

Trost announced that the rehab camp would be completely revamped under the direction of a pair of renowned sports therapists from the Bundesliga, Drs. Behrens and Krokowski.

It will also be renamed the "Kars for Kids George M. Steinbrenner Legends Rehabilitation Campus."