Another game, another two hits.
We've chosen to avoid the power alleys.
The broken bat blooper has wonderful alliteration.
The wormy ground ball through the infield stands alone.
We're not the Bronx Bombers, but rather the Bronx Bidets.
Hoping for a win tonight by Carl Pavano?
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Things Ron Darling and John Smoltz will not tell you about tonight's actual starting pitchers:
A.J. Burnett's career W-L percentage is virtually identical to Nolan Ryan's, and his career K/BB ratio is better than Ryan's.
Tommy Hunter is the grandson [by artificial insemination] of actor Tab Hunter, after whom the worst tasting diet soft drink in history was named, and whose film career is best remembered for his roles in "Operation Bikini," "Island of Desire," and "Lust in the Dust" [starring female impersonator Divine], and his debut performance in "Gay Casting Couch 7: The Warner Brothers and the Pool Boy."
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