Fearing that the Democrats would link the end of the earth, scheduled for tomorrow, to a broadening of the debt limit, the Republican leadership today, in special session, has voted "No" on any and all ideas so pertaining.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Posted by Alphonso at 1:18 PM
An unnamed Republican Senator stated (without attribution), " I do believe the Bible guarantees that Judgement Day is May 21, but we are going to have to make an exception this time."
" With all due respect to the calculations that tomorrow is exactly the 7000th year after Noah and his flood, and my firm conviction that believers are to be transported to heaven on a golden
cloud ( with a stop-over on Jupiter because the holy do not travel on the Sabbath ), we've simply got to filibuster for the Rapture to take place on a new day, " sayeth this learned republican Senator.
The fear is that Democrats left behind on earth by, " the brides of the lamb," will use this opportunity to not only increase debt limits, but also to pass new laws on corporate contributions to lobbyists, regulate the hedge funds and banks, institute single payer health care, refinance medicare and social security, end the wars in the middle east, invest in education, repair our infrastructure, and revise the tax code so that corporations and the rich pay a fair share to fund the costs of the nation.
" Clearly," said this devout and prominent Republican ( a close friend, by the way, of both Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachman), " to allow any of those changes to happen would be far worse than the end of the earth."
Amen to that.