We are nearing the darkest date on the ancient Neolithic calendar, the so-called Festival of Buhner, when Druid necromancers sacrifice virgins and bring in long-toothed war horses, in the eternal quest for a harvest of gold. On this mystical date, Aug. 1, the Ghost of Brigadoon Refsnyder is said to rise from the Netherworld to lead future legions off Vanquished Yankees to wander past the shoals of Syd Thrift, across the hinterlands of Tartabull, into the valley of Sonny Gray.
Okay, why I am writing this drivel?
Well, today, nothing quite sums up the Yankees like a wagon load of prime-cut, felony-grade drivel.
Pass the word:
The Yankees are a tomato can.
The Yankees are a tomato can.
The Yankees are a tomato can.
Without Aaron Judge, they are a lower tier team, last place in the AL East and one of the sloppiest outfits in baseball. With Judge, they are - at best - capable of chasing the last, meager birth in the Wild Card.
Worst of all, we are nearing the Aug. 1 trade deadline, when Brian Cashman annually does what he once vowed never to do:
Trade the future for the past.
With the deadline two weeks away, the tomato can Yankees couldn't even beat the worst team in the National League, a squad 22 games below .500. Our hitters could not solve journeymen starters with ERAs over 6.00. Our batting order offered not one player hitting over .260. In the final game, we blew two 2-run leads against a sleep-walking fiasco - because, well, that's exactly what we are. A sleepwalking tomato can.
And yet, we're now supposed to cheer Brian Cashman's attempts to reanimate this moribund corpse, by trading away what few prospects we have, by doubling down on the very strategy that landed us here, in his smoldering dumpster?
The Yankees are here because of Cashman's bad trades, and soon we will be subjected to yet another Aug. 1 of acquiring veterans past their expiration dates - all to chase that ridiculous last wild card birth, perhaps the cheapest goal in pro sports.
A confession: Over the years, I've come to view Cashman is a tragic character, a right-minded fellow who sold his soul to run the Yankees, and who sincerely wants the team to win. Unfortunately, he works for an owner who wants to see the Yankees win, as long as it doesn't cheapen designs for that new kitchen in the boat house. Hal Steinbrenner spends up to a point: He gets the Yankees in contention, then stops. In 2009, he spent what it took to win: He brought in Mark Teixeira, CC Sabathia and AJ Burnett. It worked. Ever since, Hal has spent only what it takes to compete.
There is a huge difference.
For the last five years, the Yankees could have had Manny Machado playing 3B. In 2018, he came to New York, almost begging for a contract. His wife is from NYC; she wanted to come home. His idol, A-Rod, wanted him in Pinstripes. It was a perfect match. Over those last five years, Machado has hit 125 HRs and led the Padres nearly to Valhalla. He costs San Diego $32 million per season, and he's worth every penny. Instead, the Yankees pay Josh Donaldson $23 million for next to nothing, with DJ LeMahieu - another $15 million disappointment - filling the gaps. They might spend $35 million for an output below the Mendoza Line.
Now, they're talking about emptying the prospect tanks for Cody Bellinger, whose career was tanking before he found refuge in Chicago.
This is no time to kill the farm system for another former star. It is time to clean house, to stop the endless exchange of young for old.
The Yankees couldn't even beat the Rockies.
The Yankees are a tomato can. The Yankees are a tomato can. The Yankees are a tomato can.
53 comments:
I think we know by the end of the week if we are buyers or sellers. We all know that we should be sellers, but we don't have much to offer in the way of players...they should move Torres, at least they can get some value from him...
Thanks for the shout-out! Always beware the Ides of Buhner. It always catches up with you.
I don't like Hal (he's not his father) but he has spent $200m plus a year for the past 10yrs. The problem is the idiot spending that money. Iron Mike Stanton, Jackie D, Frank Rizzo (1 more year) Rondon, let's not get into the prior contracts.
When you have a person in charge who doesn't realize that Yankee stadium has a short right field, then he should be on the short bus out.
Yesterday I was on the road for the last two innings of the game.
Listening to the Master and Suzyn - you could hear their deflated anguish wrapping up this
Mile-High mind cramp of a turd.
During her post game wrap up, Suzyn was agonizing over the lost and the series in Colorado like she was reporting on a clubhouse filled with dying toddlers, half eaten by starving, mountain rats.
(or something like that)
I could almost imagine Boone mindlessly playing Russian Roulette during his post game interview.
CLICK
CLICK
CLICK
Gentlemen - The whoopee cushion is empty with this team.
They have no more farts to give.
UNWAVERING!
I cannot believe the number of articles promoting the idea that the Yankees should be buyers of any kind at the trade deadline. Sell, sell, sell, dammit. And should trading Judge even be off the table at this point?
My god, please please please be sellers, we all know this season is over,,,,, the Pineapple Express has left the station!
A huge infusion of youth is way overdue. Look, it's pretty simple: hire the best scouts, hire the best coaches, pick the best prospects you can, continually get rid of old players, and bring in new blood.
It was a stupid mistake to have Peraza wasting in the minors for over a half season. Stupid to keep Florial in the minors.
One could argue that bringing up the Martian, Austin Wells, Rortveldt, you name it, all of it, was the right thing to do from day 1 of the season.
Of course they should be "sellers" at the deadline. Sell old players who aren't effective anymore. If no one wants them, release them. When you sign older players to long contracts, you knew you were making a contract with the Piper. You might get a year or two of performance, and after that, they'll drop off a cliff. Face the consequences, pay the damned Piper and move on. How long do we have to hear about this crap?
Because it is.
All this moving guys around, playing musical outfielders and musical infielders, has reduced their effectiveness and increased injuries. Jake Bauers, playing all over the outfield, was injured during a left field stint. Cabrera should be used only at 2B and RF. He should not have to practice for six different positions. Crazy!
Aaron Boone: does this guy have anything inside of his head? Whenever it's late in the game, and there is a close call against you, and your challenge has been unused, you might as well use it. What does he save his challenge for? Why does he need to get approval from upstairs before he uses his challenge? What does he have to lose, just challenge the call before time runs out. This ain't the first time this has happened this year.
Picture Aaron Boone, jiggling his legs wildly, calling on the phone: "Mr. Cashman, can I go to the bathroom?" Cashman answers "It's MAY I go to the bathroom, MAY I GO TO THE BATHROOM!"
Like just about everything else, they're going about the Judge rehab all wrong. I saw and heard on the highlights that they've got Judge running around the outfield. Why???
In the best case scenario, he comes back as DH and runs base to base, trying to stave off toe surgery until the season is over. Judge should only be taking batting practice and running the bases a little. When he's ready, he should be the full time DH. Stanton stays in RF until he gets hurt. When Stanton gets hurt, someone else will play RF, whether McKinney or Cabrera.
Instead, these bozos will have Judge playing the outfield. And he'll stub the toe and go right back on the IL, back to square one.
Steve, the “experts” and pundits don’t watch the NYY day in and day out like we do, so they really have no idea what’s going on.
These last 2 series (Cubs/Rocks) have really stuck in my craw, especially knowing that the same approach will continue. We can’t score, but we’ve stopped running, and when we do it’s stupidity like Peraza’s baserunning gaffe yesterday. We never put on a play or hit and run. Boone sits in the dugout in a stupor, chewing his cud. Now even the Angels can put some heat on us Balt, TOR, Bos all playing well (esp Balt) and are pulling away from us. But yes, let’s continue sending out Rizzo every night even though he hasn’t homered in 2 months and looks like he might not for another 2 months, and Volpe who needs to be at AAA. Will Peraza get an opportunity or will he be Florialized? And then there’s Boone, always ready with the wrong move. Accountability? Insight? Why the analytics will be right sooner or later, right? Just ask Billy Beane. Any day now, Any year now, Any decade now…
Any moves to be made at the T/D should be done with an eye towards next year.
This year’s over even if we sleaze into the final WC. This team’s flaws will only be magnified in the Post.
And how is YOUR day going?
My day is going great - thanks for asking BTR999
First trade should be the intern GM for a game used jockstrap. Then refuse delivery of the jockstrap.
"During her post game wrap up, Suzyn was agonizing over the lost and the series in Colorado like she was reporting on a clubhouse filled with dying toddlers, half eaten by starving, mountain rats."
AA--fantastic sentence. But I was under the impression that the clubhouse really was filled with dying toddlers, half eaten by starving mountain rats.
Now watch, we'll beat up on the Angels. No logic. There's no predicting baseball, beyond the fact that we suck without Judge and at this point, probably with him.
Thanks, JM.
Perhaps Suzyn wasn’t aware.
And;
CLICK
CLICK
CLICK
Brian Cashman, Phone home. Your days are numbered.
From our Brother-In-Arms, Neil Keefe:
“… In the last two weeks, the Yankees have had a third player in eight seasons suspended for domestic violence, went 3-3 on a road trip against the last-place A’s and last-place Cardinals, lost a home series to the Cubs, disgraced the iconic Yankees uniform with a Starr Insurance jersey sleeve advertisement, fell to last place in the AL East, fell out of a playoff spot, fired their hitting coach and hired Aaron Boone’s friend of 30 years with no coaching experience for the position and now lost two of three to the worst team in the NL.”
I think that about sums it up.
Mantle was injured in 1965 and he was basically the only post holding up the tent. The Yankees folded, finished sixth.
In 1966, our last last place experience, the Yanks were 43-51 after 94 games, having lost the first of four against....
CALIFORNIA!!!!!
Our current record is basically the flip of that, 50-44. So we're seven games better.
Mantle had a 3.6 WAR that sad year. I don't think we'll have anyone approaching that mark this year.
By the way, he made $100k in '66 and Whitey made $61k.
I tried to explain to some family members who are also Dde-hard Yankee fans, why I am rooting for them to lose cuz they must burn before the Phoenix can rise.
Yet strangely it still pains me when they lose, in those moments when intellect has not yet subsumed emotion.
I told them it is like when you really had to punish your children when they were little. It hurt but you had to do it. You accepted the emotional pain of seeing your child "suffering" because you knew that it would be better for them as their lives progressed.
Even in explaining it out loud gave it clarity. I don't know how else to explain it.
So continues to lose my sons.
The late night CA games will be too late for me to watch, except for maybe the first halves.
Fine by me. Might not even bother with the early innings the way things are going.
Seems like a normal time for a game to me, JM.
Guess you got sprung from Palm Springs
For those who still "Don't Stop Thinking About Tomorrow', the Yanks have signed their first two draft picks.
Contract details have not yet been released.
Th 2nd pick (Rd.3) is scheduled to have TJ surgery July 24TH.
Just kidding. but I bet some of youse guys believed it.
Archie,
These kids of yours need to feel the wrath of the switch. They have turned into unappreciative little fucking brats. Keel-hauling might be appropriate also.
Shit, just get rid of the nitwit owner and his sycophant intern.
Rufus, my mom was an artist with the switch. She could have had me rooting for Yaz, with enthusiasm....
But, all this talk of the "Future". With all due respect intended. What future are we waiting for? The Martian seems to have been hammered into the orbit of Uranus. Every starter becomes, at best, a decent bullpen arm. Highly anticipated up the middle talent become praised "versatile" utility men. Let Cashman trade them all, maybe he gets fired. I'm now convinced that this team goes nowhere until Hal cleans house. BTW, I have said it before, but Rizzo wrecked his neck months back. We can't replace him this year.
Rizzo was clearly concussed during that injury at first base and has yet to recover from it.
He stumbled around like a boxer out on his feet before he dropped down to one knee.
(and how are you able to be out in the daylight, Kevin? are you a Daywalker like Blade?)
I agree and go further, Hal should clean house of everyone from the coaches and trainers to the top of the organization (Levine, Trost, Cashman). Then he should hand over the keys to the kingdom to someone else and walk away. Entitled incompetence and mediocrity is a disease that rots from the top down. Hal is an incompetent, disinterested trust funder and everyone else he put in charge of with the organization is made from the same cloth. This is Hal's mess. I want to walk through their offices and see nothing but empty desks, with the keys held by security for the next owners.
Until then, at best the Yankees are just rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. At worst (and usually) young and talented will be traded for old and busted, with the hope of making a wild card berth and perpetuating the fraud for another season. Nobody in the decision-making ranks knows how to play baseball or cares.
I...I find myself agreeing with you EBD. Hal is the base problem. Boone is a stooge, Cashhat is a stooge, both equally inept. But with in HAL's business model they're perfectly competent.
What I think, I think they all get together after the season is over, Trost, Levine, HAL, all of them, likely mid-December, someplace warm. Annual business meeting to assess the state of the team. Some of you are business people, my wife is a business person, you know what I mean. The annual meeting.
They go over the goals set last year. Only the goals are financially driven - profits, team worth, that sort of thing. Not baseball goals. And every year they meet their goals. Team value is up, revenues are up, everybody making money. Bonuses, cigars, major awards, booze and hookers for those interested. Lots of bac-slapping. Why shake things up when we're all fucking the fatted calf?
So JD might miss the rest of the season. I’m glad about this, but this is too convenient…I think you know what I mean…
Glad someone else reads the Guardian here.
And YES - the Steinbrenners should sell the team.
I agree.
Ok folks Peraza starts leading off…good juju from everyone…
So I asked the Magic 8-Ball if Ohtani will homer off Severino tonight.
Answer: You May Rely On It.
how any times, 999?
Sure glad that David Cone is in da house
A/A. “Reply Hazy”
Pereza must have attended The Gleyber Torres School of Baserunning.
Let’s see Sevy lose the lead we DON’T have…
Man, Rizzo’s killing us
Would you rather listen to Justin Shakil? Really?
EBD just put a smile on my face. 🤣
Boone has to be looking to get Sevy out of there. Almost fifty pitches. Time to manage.
Rizzo struck out on a ball well down and out of the strike zone. That’s got nothing to do with a bad neck. That’s an aging hitter guessing. He should be job 1 for Casey, who needs to find a way to make him quicker to the ball. Good luck with that
Ohtani straight up for Stanton
King got crowned again.
You know, it’s amazing how often the Yankees allow the opposition’s big hitter to beat us. It’s never a thought to simply pitch around them. When they issued the IBB earlier to Ohtani, it worked. There never seems to be any plan, or really any thought process at all emanating from the coaches or Boone. They’re just….there. Boone is the worst of all. It’s like his head is there just to keep his ears apart.
These teams are like two chronic patients fighting over jello.
More x inning offensive failure, because they simply can’t make contact with such big swings. This is your challenge Casey. Don’t look for help from boone.. you’re on your own.
Another game, another loss. As Boone likes to say it’s all in front of us.
Welp, time for the EC contingent to hit the hay.
Good Night!😴
Click
There is a bright spot amidst all this blight: according to an article in the always reliable ESPN website, it appears that Donaldson might be done for the year.
You take your good news wherever you can find it.
It’s Brian’s team…
Someone please tell me why reporters ever make references to "bat flips". The NY Post headline caught my attention, referring to an "epic" bat flip following Ohtani's home run. Yes, I am sore loser and just not in the mood, but right now I can think of a few uses for that bat... "Epic". Fckngamzng.
For those that care, YGY reports that Frankie goes to Montas’ rehab program has been shut down and he is out for the year. The team has no financial obligation to him past this year.
You insulted cans of tomatoes everywhere.
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